Next up Ron has asked for split pea with ham I will do that soon. Headache is gone now, and I had to put more salt in the veggie soup but it looks good.
Ron got into the caramel nut bars I left out for him, they have 10 grams protein each and he really enjoyed it. I will not tell him it is healthy, of course. I will act slightly disapproving.
Re: my marriage what I have works for me. You don't have to understand but it does. Yes, I get frustrated, especially when he is drinking but overall I am pretty happy most of the time. I feel respected most of the time and Ron basically said the same yesterday.
Unfortunately some of you have a tendency to take certain things out of context and amplify them. For instance, Ron missing the urinal on occasion. He was being sarcastic when he told me he was doing it on purpose. Yes, some dribbled on the floor but not the huge lakes that were being made out to be. He doesn't even urinate that often, I am always yelling at him to drink more water. And the fix was easy enough, get rid of the carpet and put a doormat. That has solved the problem. That is only something we can do as homeowners can you imagine a landlord finding that? OOoh. So that was fixed. Do I honestly care if he misses a little now and then? No, it is not done maliciously and he is old and feeble. The last thing he needs is someone flogging him over something he can't control. It is easy enough to say "Take him to the toilet" but it is very hard for him to get into and out of his wheelchair. There are other things I don't talk about and that is OK too.
I knew going into it: I was marrying an older man, he would decline. I was OK with that back in 1992. I was OK with it when we got legally married in 2003 (about the only good thing to come out of 2003). I married a man in a wheelchair I had a pretty good idea what to expect. I am OK with it now. Things are at a point I can handle the issues myself and we are both happy for that. I had very clear eyes I knew he would deteriorate especially after the accident.
It is sad for me to look back he was in such good shape up until the accident, he made a really good recovery, but then his back and he's back in a wheelchair and very limited. I don't expect another improvement he is over 60. At some point I will talk to him about doing therapy to maintain the function he has - I have a book of exercises we can do at home. That would be a good idea a few times a week IF he is up for it. I honestly think he could go either way. I don't believe he will ever get on the exercise bike again.
And I want to try the "Ron washes his legs and feet while sitting on the edge of the tub" thing. I think that will help a lot if we can do that. He doesn't like me to wash his legs due to the nerve disease. It is painful for him; I don't want to cause him pain.
That's it for now.
10 comments:
When Ron passes you will see just how unhappy you wrre living like this.
So Ron didn't intentionally piss on the floor in front of the plumbers and offer you up for sex with them for a reduction in the bill and then blast porn from his talking book?
He also didn't have the cops called on him that day because he was so out of control?
He will never do physical therapy ever. You have said this b--shit numerous times. And if his cognitive condition is what you are blaming on his losing thugs you should get POA over him since he is mentally incompetent.
So you think a man who is unable to straighten himself because of pain is going to be able to do leg exercises. You really are in denial. Yes get rid of the exercise bike it is just taking up space in the house and neither ron nor you will ever use it. Just like all that money you invested in turning the garage into a home gym and that lasted like 3 months and no you use none of it. Just more manic buying and wasteful spending. You could sell the bike on craigs list for $20.00 but I know you like to just give stuff away since you have so much money.
He ought to be able to do the exercises they taught at the rehab hospital.
I will get back to using the bike but he won't. I had the home gym in the garage for 20 years. I had the kettlebells for a few months and still do. I got rid of the stuff I had 20 years.
I have room for the bike so keeping it, and the kettlebells will get moved into the orange room after we finish Ron's room (I am keeping the orange room vacant so I can move his crap in there during the repairs).
You don't lose things? I do I couldn't find my flip flops for 10 minutes today.
I called the ambulance because I wanted him evaluated, they sent police against my wishes. But he did behave at the end of it so it worked out. He was very drunk that day.
NO he did not urinate on the floor he did make some inappropriate jokes and played XXX scenes from his talking books because he thought it was "funny". But I don't think the social worker is interested in him being tasteless.
How can an immobile man lose something in his room. Maybe it’s under his bed or stuck next to the bed and the wall. So instead of buying a new one spend the time to look there? Remember he was stuffing urjnals or something under his bed.
Also maybe you lost all those items that the storage company allegedly stole.
That's why I want to pull out all the garbage, he has a lot of broken junk, trash, etc., get that tossed and sort through what is left. I venture we could get him down by 90%. That all has to go before a home visit anyway.
"You don't lose things? I do I couldn't find my flip flops for 10 minutes today. " Sure people lose things. BUT ron loses things ALL the time because he is drunk. NOT because he has a head injury. Why must you try and make up stuff about the reason he loses stuff? This is the same reason he breaks stuff. Because he is drunk. It is just the reality of what you are living with.
Why would you let trash pile up in his room? You are the sighted one. If you see garbage pick it up and throw it out. I don't understand letting someone live in a room filled with trash and broken items.
He has a hard time letting some things go. He could have a big hoarding issue if he were more mobile and sighted.
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