I went to bed early and stayed there, no excuses. Ron was complaining about the litter box in his room, it was pissy, I said I will get it tomorrow and went back to sleep. I woke up a couple of times, once I was really craving a nice cold drink and got into that gallon of Orange Juice in the fridge... went back to bed.
Ron's alarm went off at 8. I brushed my teeth, scraped my hair back, fed the cats, did their water, helped him with some accounting. Then I did the litter boxes, his was kind of pissy. Spotty and Biscuit got out in the garage when I got some litter to refill Ron's box. I don't have the energy to chase them.
Someone threw up in my bed in the middle of the night, but the opposite side from where I was sleeping, I will have to wash that today.
I took a lot of Vitamin C yesterday, today I am taking oregano oil and probiotics. They say a lot of your immune system is in your gut so why not stock it with soldiers? Seems logical and it won't hurt if I'm wrong.
Ron isn't sick, thank God. He gets pretty needy when he is sick, which is fine most times but not when I, myself, am sick. The worst he ever was outside of medical things/the accident he flew out to see his parents in '99.
He had been smoking a lot of pot at home. When he got there he was drinking with his brother and had a tobacco smoke. We flew back to CA with a woman who seemed very ill, and sure enough a few days later Ron got it.
I was sick every winter growing up so I like to think I am immune to a lot of what's out there. He kept smoking even sick and the flu progressed to pneumonia.
And this is who he used to be, he was very sick, coughing up blood and ick, running a fever, miserable. The hospital our HMO used was about a mile away. He got an appointment, and he wouldn't take a cab to go because he didn't want to get the driver sick. That's who he used to be, a very considerate man. So he walked, with pneumonia, a mile to and from the hospital.
When we got there they examined Ron and said he had pneumonia, gave him a script, and said if the hospital wasn't so full they would admit him. But, the doctor said, he figured I could take good care of Ron, and I did.
He spent Y2K sick in bed, he actually got up at midnight to have some more pot, and coughed for 10 minutes after. I was glad when he used it all up because it was killing him.
Not that the alcohol is any better!
My hemp oil gummies seem to be helping with my headaches, it is a nice alternative. I don't have any other affects than the headache mitigation. We are getting a "head shop" opening nearby (walking distance) so I can get more supplies there in the summer when it would be impossible to ship a gummy product.
I am always up for a realistic natural alternative. Headache pills are hard on the liver and kidneys and cause rebound headaches. The hemp just works without the bad side effects. Nice. And a reasonable cost, as well.
I have a lot of anxiety all the time so I don't really notice a mitigation but between my life (!!), my illness (!!), and my caffeine usage (!!!) I wouldn't expect to.
I have talked to Ron about retiring from the program. He said he wants to keep working. But he was tempted.
If he was on board with retiring he would be very supportive of me getting my own job and that would make separation a lot easier. But I don't push it.
I am not hungry, I never am when I'm sick, so I'm not eating. When I do get an appetite I will do a lot of protein.
I am sure I caught this going out somewhere, probably Walmart. I doubt I caught it from any of my Uber drivers because they were all healthy. Probably got it on paratransit, it's a petri dish.
Which leads to the question, do I hole up at home for the next couple months or do I do out anyway risking I might get sick again? It is very uncommon for me to get colds/flu.
I am thinking my immune system is pretty robust and I will keep going out. I need to for my sanity.
I take Spotty to get neutered at 1:45. They are going to examine him today, fast him tonight (I don't like to keep water from Biscuit), and neuter him tomorrow. Then I pick him up on Friday.
It is hard fasting one cat in my house because they all fast, I want Biscuit in particular to have access to his food and water. That is very important for his health.
Ron is working on the report. If I asked him if he wanted to retire right now he would say yes! It is a lot for him.
I still feel pretty groggy and woke up with a moderate headache but I am better than yesterday. Hopefully I will fight this off pretty quick.
That's it for now.
9 comments:
Why would Ron retire from the program when you do all the work while he almost never goes in? That's laughable.
Of COURSE he wants to keep “working”. He barely has to/can do any work since he has an employee (you) to do all of it. And he gets most of the income.
He has talked about leaving. The other vendor is very vested in having us stay so we would see. He knows a new vendor would demand a lot of concessions he is not willing to give, and he has flat out mentioned he would not share the stockroom with another vendor.
But Ron does have a pretty cushy setup here.
Correction he has threatened you about leaving, that is quite different than his actually retiring. And the other posters are right he does none of the work for the majority of the pay so really the only reason he would quit is so he could spend more time getting drunk and blacking out.
And that is the primary reason I would likely leave if he retires. I am not busting my ass every day working for someone while he blacks out every day.
Can you imagine what I would come home to, every day? Horrors.
Well he is going to retire eventually and then what? What happened to being in it for the long haul?
I must be thick today; in the business for the long haul? Or the marriage?
I don't see how anyone can read the blog "on the regular" and question why I might want to leave.
If he is bad now having to sober up now and then to work, imagine how bad it can get with him being drunk 24/7. And it is pretty bad as it is.
You already said you won't leave no matter what. So why ask him about his retirement when you know without that job you will stay and his drinking will get worse. He should never retire unless he has to go into a nursing home or hospice.
I am leaning more towards looking at leaving... he is just impossible at times and will rot his brain eventually with the alcohol, break a hip, something and I won't be able to care for him. Or he will become so toxic I will have to flee. I am not sure what the tipping point but I am starting to see there will be one.
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