Monday

A classic example, long day: 1 PM "I am going to take a nap"  Ron: "OK". 

Remember I got up at 2 AM to fix and stock HIS vending machines, take HIM to the doctor, get HIM money from the bank, etc. 

Ron sits in the kitchen drinking, I can hear him but he appears to be "trying" to be quiet so I don't complain, then he gets out his phone and starts making "stupid" phone calls to the supervisor.  The goal is really to say OFF her radar, I would say. 

He has a couple of very loud conversations, calls something automated and makes a bunch of loud touch tone noises, etc.  I finally got up as he decided he was finished. 

I told him I was awake now, not to worry about waking me up.  Implied, because he already had.  He went ballistic, screaming at me, cursing me out, etc.  Saying I am demanding unreasonable sleep hours. 

I reminded him I got up at 2 AM to fix, and stock, your vending machines.  That didn't matter, what mattered was "God stuck us together" etc.  But if I told him I wanted to leave he would have a fit and say it was a sin to break up a marriage. 

He got so angry he turned off his phone - I told him don't bother with that, I'm already awake.  He turned it on again and dialed something, punched some buttons angrily. 

Then he spitefully told me I had made a trip for you to go to Walmart tomorrow, but I cancelled it.  Like I WANTED to go with him!  All he would do is complain the whole time and make it miserable, wouldn't "give" me enough time, etc.  If he had asked I would have said absolutely do not make a trip to Walmart.

He is used to being "the transportation master" and deciding where I go, when, and for how long.  Making me beg for trips please sir may I... or making me spend hours on the bus one way...Now I can say fork it and go when and how I want... he hates that.  And that is one reason I would always live where I have independent transport, no matter who I married. 

Anyway, some of my neighbors decided to have a party last night, I didn't get to sleep until late, and then I had to get up at 2.  I took my shower, got ready, got Ron ready. 

I knew there was a cold front coming but I opted not to bring the jackets, as we already had a lot of stuff.  I had money with us to go to the bank later. 

We went to work, I went straightaway to fixing the machine that wasn't working, God let me get it pretty easily, it was working when I left.  That is a third of our income right there. 

All I got was Ron bitching and literally shouting at God all day about Him being "unfair" and "slow to come back".  Ron has a ferocious depression but is so abusive I am at the point of not caring, just wanting to flee.  So I didn't even get a "Thank you" for saving him time, sales, goodwill, and a $75 service call. 

You're welcome.

The ride was late to go to the doctor, the sandwich guy was playing head games, etc.  But we got to the office an hour early which is better than an hour late. 

Ron was in a fair amount of pain and had been yelling with it, at times.  Cold fronts are bad for him as they expand his joints.  Short version of what I understand. 

Doc saw him, keeping Ron at the same dose.  I asked for more magnets and Ron is not yelling any more so a good call.  Doc applied them and we waited on our ride to go to the bank, another hour. 

I went to the gas station and got myself some snacks.  The driver was "dumb" and "couldn't find us" even though we had very clear landmarks in the trip notes, driving around in circles across the street, etc.  No other driver has ever had that kind of trouble finding the address.  It just isn't that hard.  Then, when she picked us up, she wanted to complain about the difficulty for 10 minutes, mentions we were an added trip, "They took my regular off of me".  Ah, the hostility explained.  I get she has issues with management, don't take it out on the customers. 

I have never done that no matter how Ron has treated me.  One time, at work, MANY years ago, he slapped me.  I took one step away, turned around, and slapped him back, saying "You will not hit me"  He has never done it again.  And a couple minutes later a customer needed help and he got it with a good attitude, because it wasn't his fault Ron was a jackass. 

At least it was a straight ride.  This branch has a lack of tellers, only one working the window when we showed up, a line of about 20 customers, and no business line.  That is pitiful. 

We had to wait forever in line.  Ron was in better spirits with the magnets working.  I cashed in the money and got the rest of my pay, gave Ron his cut, and we called Arturo, who was only a couple miles away. 

If Ron wants to be greedy with the money that is on him.  I agreed to what I got, so I am OK with that, but not happy, and not forgetting, he played games with my pay this time.  Like I said in the comment earlier the bill changer generates a lot of money and I have the only key, so worst case I would just take my pay out of that.  But I don't think he is that stupid. 

We came home, I fed the cats, and attempted to take a nap.  We all know how that ended.  Ron seems bright and perky drinking in the kitchen even though I know he did not get much sleep last night, either.  He is probably afraid to go to sleep, worried I will play some sick "wakeup" game when he is out.  I wouldn't do that - if he wants to be a jackass that is on him. 

I need to hash out my budget.  I have $80 in auto pays coming out and I need to repay my savings $100.  I am just debating do I go to the bank today, once I figure out what I'm depositing, or do I wait and do it tomorrow when I am fresher.  I am leaning towards tomorrow. 

Biscuit is next to my foot, licking his privates.  He's a good boy. 

I did manage to stock all "my" machines well enough we are good for a couple of days off.  I am still just so sick and angry Ron is so hateful, angry, and unappreciative.  I have talked to him about wet brain.  I suggested strongly we get it diagnosed and explained the treatment.  He is not interested.  He is just going to keep declining, crapping on me, etc. and then after I am gone he's going to fall one day, end up in the ER, get diagnosed that way, and it all could have been prevented.  Then he will be free to have a wonderful life without me, which he thinks is possible. 

Great, I think he just passed out in the kitchen.  AGH.