Friday morning

Blogger is acting up I hope I can still post.  

Last night went OK.  I don't have the tools I need to do my job which is frustrating, especially since I work for a massive corporation with nearly infinite resources.  But I do what I can.  

I got home OK, Mom and Dad were fine, which is a big relief after the COVID exposure last week.  I guess the shots did work.  Dad is not in great health so happy to see he is spry.  When I call late (after 8 PM) he always falls asleep during the conversation but that is OK, he starts off fine and I am not going to force him to stay awake.  We said our I love yous and know each other is OK that is what matters.  

We did not start off so well.  I was a complete Daddy's girl but felt totally cast aside when he remarried.  Suddenly he never had time for me.  I rebelled as a teenager, running off with the most unsuitable man possible.  I had a lot of anger at Dad for various things for some years but managed to forgive him after Ron's accident.  So we got through all that.  

Of course my illness did not help.  I know sometimes when I was a teen I was acting out and I could see Dad remembering my mother and thinking "Here we go again".  Poor Dad!  Poor Heather!  

I still haven't figured out what I'm doing with my diet.  I would like to go lower carb.  No more donuts.  Figure out new convenience foods.  Do some more cooking, etc.  I haven't hashed out the details on that yet but I think I will get a frozen chub of sausage today before work and stick it in my insulated tote bag.  I can definitely eat that no matter what I do.  

Some foods I would like to eat: non starchy vegetables.  Corn tortillas (I like them with cheese), Cheese.  Meat.  Beans.  Food I would not like to eat: bread, flour items like donuts.  Sugar.  Chips.  Cookies.  I may just stick with that for my meal plan, it is not "low" carb but better for me.  I just can't remember what I was eating last year when I lost all the weight.  

I am not concerned with looking hot.  I don't have a man in my life and I'm not looking (still plan to wait at least 4 more years).  I am concerned with my joints.  There are a fair amount of heavy, middle aged, women at work and they all limp around like they just got kicked.  I don't want that to be me, I want healthy joints.  Which means getting off the extra weight.  Ron compared it to dog food.  How hard would it be to lug a 40 pound sack of dog food everywhere you went?  It would be awful.  How nice would it be to put it down?  So I'm mainly on that.  I would like to lose some flab - for me - just for vanity of course and get into a clothing size that does not have a "W" on it as well.  Also flour and white sugar aggravate joint pain.  I have noticed my legs hurt when I eat the donuts, for instance.  So some good reasons to do this.  

I may work out some on my days off we will see.  I think I will take the "something is better than nothing" approach on that.  I can't go running or whatever on a day I'm on my feet for 11 hours but I can do the bike and some kettlebells on my day off.  

I'm going to come back to this before I leave for the day.  Called my aunt, that was nice.  It is always good to hear from her.  

 I think it may work better to call in the morning with her now.  

So I am all ready to go.  "Keys badge phone" now is lunch, stun gun, candy for drivers, bottle of water for me (I put a little salt in it because I lose salt easily taking lithium), keys, money for me, money for drivers, spare change, and my bus pass.  I am wearing my trusty pair of jeans I got at the thrift store with good pockets so I know they won't be falling off, and I put yesterday's pair out by the garage and I will put them up on my day off.  I hope I never have to wear them again.  

Not sure what I am doing for my lunch I brought a lunchable though.  I can always have that on my break.  

So far when my aunt comes we will go get my blood test, go to eyeglass shop and get my tune up, and then hopefully breakfast and then the thrift store.  We will see.  I love going to thrift stores but not easy riding the bus.  When I lived in CA I was in a smaller town and it was very centrally located, transportation hub just blocks from our apartment, two grocery stores, thrift store, post office, bank, everything I needed in walking distance.  It was great.  I do miss that.  

But I really feel Jesus is taking me back pretty soon so if I stop posting the same time millions disappear you will know what happened.  My faith is in Him.  Life would be so awful without Him.  My faith is the only thing that kept me going the last several years and after Ron's death.  Then wondering what exactly killed him for months after - it was 6 months before I got a cause of death.  

On that note I am going to order more tracts.