Thursday, November 7, 2019

Early Thursday

I tried to get a good night's sleep last night but it just doesn't seem fated. 

Example: Ron woke me up at 2 being obnoxious. 

I got up at 6 when my alarm went off to take my antibiotic.  I had a headache so I took my headache pills instead of my ibuprofen.  So far I am OK on headache and dental pain. 

Ron was already up, he was drinking.  When he is sober and in a listening mood I will suggest that having a whole bottle of vodka is not a challenge, he does not need to see how much he can finish.  If he had someone pouring shots (not me!) he would be shocked how much he drinks.  I estimate about 16 shots a day. 

16 servings a day.  That is a lot.  At one point I mentioned two facts about my mother to Ron, she died with a cheap 2 liter bottle of vodka on the nightstand, and she drank about a fifth a day. 

Ron brags about it, that he's the same.  Like it's a contest.  My mother had a miserable life, why would you want to emulate that?  Then he gets angry when I won't "help" him with alcohol and blames my mother for it.  And I tell him, again and again, I have very few bad memories of my mother drinking, but I have hundreds of you.  It is not her, it's you.  YOUR bad behavior drives my decision not to help.  Then he starts cursing me out. 

Speaking of cursing I am very frustrated with a woman at work.  She is one of those "feed the feral but don't do a TNR"  "Oh, another one got run over... my dog killed one, so sad..." doesn't see her own hand in this.  I have given her information for places that do TNR. 

TNR, if you are wondering is where you catch an unsocialized cat, fix it, and return it to the place you got it, and someone agrees to feed it and keep an eye on it, provide water and shelter, etc.  It is a good experience for both cat and caregiver.  But she just wants to put out big bowls of food and milk (! cats hate milk!  It makes them sick!) every day, watch them run around, and do nothing else.  They are breeding like mad and dying off at an alarming rate.  She told me about the latest one dying, looking for sympathy, and I just asked when she planned to contact the TNR people.  She stepped back "Oh, I will, someday, just not right now".  In the meantime the cats keep suffering and dying.  I think she likes to see the kittens run around but doesn't care enough to get the parents fixed. 

She wants cute little babies!  Every day!  But doesn't want to be responsible before they reach a breeding age.  I just decided I am going to have a talk with her.  She is able bodied, so is her husband.  They both have vehicles.  They have animal traps.  There is no excuse.  I am going to tell her to call Animal Control and have them get ALL the cats if she will not do a TNR, because it is kinder to be put down at the shelter than dying in the street. 

It would be a lot more humane.  But I doubt she will do it because she likes the kittens, but not enough to catch, tame, find them homes, no she just wants cute little kittens running around and waiting for the food bowl. 

SUPER FRUSTRATING. 

I can see why they pass ordinances making it a crime to feed stray cats.  With people like her they do so much harm to the animal rescue movements, irresponsible at best.  And not loving to the cats. 

You will notice MY cats got fixed the minute they came in the door; in Cleo's case BEFORE I even brought her in the house.  I can care for them properly, food, water, litter, good places to hang out, toys, etc.  That is very important to me to be a good pet provider. 

Enough about that.  So I cleaned the litter box, etc.  Ron didn't want me to look at his leg and was doing his 'angry victim" routine where he screams at God.  It would suck a lot more to be him in another country, all he could do is beg.  Here he has a pretty good life, pets, a loving wife, a good place to live, a job, transportation, medical care, great things to eat, etc. 

I have to tell you about the precooked hamburger.  I read about them online and they sounded interesting.  So I bought a package and some whole wheat buns.  I heated one up with some BBQ sauce on it, cheese, bacon (precooked also).  It smelled so good Ron wanted a bite and then he ate the whole thing, which is great because he does not get enough protein.  They are really good and easy to fix, lots of protein and red meat.  Good for both of us. 

I got more on my last order, more buns.  They didn't have the cheese but I will probably do another order today. 

Ron is pretty agitated today.  I got him to bed and normally he goes to sleep.  This time he has been agitated, keeps trying to get out of bed, yelling for me "nevermind", etc.  Very frustrating.  I am just glad I am not trying to sleep because he wouldn't "allow" it. 

And you don't know how that pisses me off, when he does that "You don't get to sleep tonight" routine. 

I am out of soda, I drank my last one this morning.  The plan is to only drink them at work.  I have some good iced tea (diet) I can drink in the morning.  I will be doing caffeine for a while but phasing out of soda.. then cutting back on the caffeine.  Do I think I will be "done" with caffeine?  Not by a long shot.  But I think it is better (for my teeth, if nothing else) to just take a caffeine tablet than drink a soda. 

I detest coffee.  I never really got into it, it upset my stomach, digestive issues with that, then I worked at a coffee shop in '97.  It was a tiny place, about the size of my house.  She used to sell the blandest soups and terrible pastries she made herself.  The job was OK but I had a problem with the male owner forcing me to drink several large cups of coffee a day, I couldn't sleep at night, very jittery.  The female owner used to bring her large dog into the facility after closing and it would hang out behind the counter.  That is against EVERY health law.  It got worse, she accused me of stealing her terrible pastries and I denied it.. a week later she said she figured out THE DOG was getting into the bin and eating the pastries.  Yuck! 

Happy to quit that job.  So I don't do coffee.  I will drink hot tea on occasion but not very often these days.  I do have an electric kettle but that is found more often making me a cup of noodles. 

Well, Ron is finally quiet now.  I guess I had to tell him I wasn't coming the next time he called. 

The cats are good, I did their boxes this morning, fed them wet and dry.  I need to take a shower but I will likely not be taking a nap for a while.  I need to see what Walmart has for delivery as I do agree I need to cover Ron's "owie" without irritating it further. 

I guess I will go do the shop now. 

Biscuit came by to remind me to tell you he was utterly awesome last night with the snuggles, petting, massage, and purring.  He is a family favorite.  He's a very lovable cat. 

Even Cleo is liking me better now which is important as I need to be able to handle her and get her to come when called.  I heard one of the tom cats outside my window a while ago meowing but it walked off, probably after urinating on my siding. 

I am so blessed Spotty has been a good boy with not being neutered yet.  He only uses his box and normal cat behavior.  He has a little "stud tail" - a little greasy at the base of his tail, but nothing else.  That gives me time to save up for his procedure. 

My aunt set a very clear, good, boundary, recently and said she would be happy to help me take my cats to the vet but no farther, so a spay clinic is out.  My vet has done a good job on everyone, including Biscuit. 

I just need to figure out if I want to put the extra money into paying off the credit card or Spotty... I could do both but it will take a minute, a minute I seem to have, happily. 

What a morning and it's barely 9. 

11 comments:

Anonymous said...

Remember when you claimed if he wouldn’t let you sleep that was when you would leave?

Ron can do anything and you won’t go. Anything.

It’s frustrating as a reader who cares about you that you let yourself get lorded over by this horrible man.

Get away from him.

Your family stunk but he’s awful too. Normal relationships aren’t like this. You are throwing your life away for a man who doesn’t even care about you.

Anonymous said...

Any chance he is getting infected? 14 comments yesterday about his leg but you don't mention it today. My dad was hospitalized for a wound infection and then had to go to rehab where he had "daily" IV antibiotics for a long time. His infection made him out of his mind, too.

Anonymous said...

just looked up how many shots in a fifth = 16!
So, a fifth a day. He should be proud of himself.

Anonymous said...

I looked back through your blog. Ron got burned on October 14. That's almost a MONTH ago!
I know how you can lose track of time but it's getting serious. I don't think his wound should still be open. You're the caregiver and you always document everything to protect yourself. At least call a Dr. for advice so you protect yourself if it goes bad.

Heather Knits said...

Well, no discharge, the open part is closing with new skin (sort of reminds me of the road rash after his accident, healed from the outside in). The bandaged skin is irritated but I think it just needs fresh air. I decided to keep doing the betadine and leave it open.

I am really tempted to put up an image but that would be too ick for Blogger, I think.

Anonymous said...

Protect yourself

Anonymous said...

Suddenly there is no discharge?

Anonymous said...

if the wound is red, do what the hospitals do and mark the edges with felt marker to see if it stays within the lines or spreads.

Heather Knits said...

There has been very little discharge the last few days..I am not worried about the main body of the wound, which is closing, so much as the skin under the bandage is pretty angry looking and some of it stuck to the bandage and came off last night. Not much but enough to bleed. Ron also protested for the first time as the removal was painful, so no more bandage. That worries me, how long will that be healing?

But the main scab it you will is looking pretty good.

Anonymous said...

What time are you taking him to the doctor?

Heather Knits said...

I just checked it, it is looking better. All the red-purple irritation from the bandage is greatly reduced and just a little left now, will leave it naked. I swabbed everything in Betadine.