Ron's nephew contacted me again wanting "the death certificate the funeral home can do it not the state one". There is only one death certificate per my aunt. She is married to a Yale lawyer, I'm going to believe her.
I told him they don't have cause of death. And then I told him to call my aunt I don't envy her that one. He abruptly ended the conversation. I think all his sincerity has just been a ploy to get the money. He keeps saying "he wants it to go to me" but then says the policy names his mother the beneficiary.
Ron's sister is a very selfish, greedy, woman. Her last in person interaction she went into his hospital room at night screaming at him, as Ron begged her to stop, because Ron had told his Dad he wanted to go home with me, and had told his brother to treat me with "the respect due Ron's wife". Neither of them ever managed that, let me tell you! No way is she going to hand over a thousand dollars to me. Assuming the policy is even valid.
I texted my aunt giving her a heads up. I also asked her not to divulge the name of the crematory as I don't want the (family name)'s meddling with that. They can get the certificate on their own from the state when the official cause of death is found. They don't "need" the money. They had no idea Ron died until his nephew found out on Facebook. They only care about the money, I doubt they have shed a tear. And probably plenty of finger pointing in my direction as well. They never liked me.
Ron wanted 2 things from them: treat Heather with respect and call me now and then. The last time Ron talked to his sister on the phone she asked him why he was "talking funny" very derisive and Ron reminded her he had a stroke that affected his speech. They all blocked his number so he stopped calling some years back. I told him I found it very upsetting watching him try to call and then get depressed. But when we called his mother some years back on my (new) cell phone she picked right up. When she found out it was Ron she said she had to go, hung up, and they no longer answered my number either.
They treated him horribly and that made him so sad. Now picking at the carcass. Ron would be furious.
Ron would also want me to forgive them and I do. I left a final message for the nephew he can deal with my aunt from now on, if he wants to get me the photos he has the address to drop on the porch or mail them. And I unfriended him. It is obvious he is trying to use me to get a payoff. Ron wouldn't want him jerking me around (I didn't say that).
I can't have (family name) jerking me around in my worst hour. I don't need it. They don't give a crap about me. Never have. They resented me. They are not out for my best interest now. They play sick games. Ron is dead. I don't have to suck up to them anymore.
And I won't I need supportive people in my life, those who are going to love me and hold me up to God in their prayers. NOT getting that from the (family name)'s.
I forgive them they did have a hard time coming up, but I don't have to sign up for abuse either. And I won't. If I get the pictures, great, but it is apparent they are being used as a bargaining chip and Ron would not want me to play.
He talked to this nephew a few days before he died and when he hung up he said (translation to socially acceptable phrase Blogger will permit) "He's ignorant". Ron was NOT impressed.
Edit, the nephew left me an irate message on Facebook when he found out I had unfriended him. I can't help but feel like I made the right call. I am the widow - Ron hadn't even spoken to this guy in decades. I am grieving. I deserve better than to be jerked around by greedy people looking to profit off Ron's death. I'm sorry I put anything on Facebook or even accepted his "friend" request to begin with.
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