Wednesday, September 11, 2019

We finally got it finished.

It was ugly but we got it done. 

Ron feels I am asking for more than he can give. 
He refuses to get an evaluation.  Like my aunt said, it's not like they could fix him. 
Can't write a lot because management could read it.  But: scary.  I feel like we have been through enough already. 

At least I got the union on Roy's ass - he's the man who ran over Ron.  Now he will leave us alone or I will file (as instructed) a formal complaint with our police force.  But he doesn't want to lose his cushy day job so I doubt he will be a problem anymore. 

Yes, I know all that comes from guilt but that is his problem, not mine.  I didn't run a red light recklessly jabbering on a cell phone.  He did.  He should feel guilty, if he knew the HALF of what I've been through he would be aghast.  Not to mention Ron in agonizing daily pain and lost most of his mobility.  So I am glad I did that because days like today when Ron's telling me he has brain damage and is doing his best... heartbreaking. 

He is back on the computer.  I hope he doesn't want to change any numbers. 

Now that I am a little bit out I can laugh about it.  So I log onto the site because Ron says he will "be right there".  And it won't let me log in until I change the password.  So I have to figure out a new password, caps, lower case, punctuation/symbols, longish, and something I can remember.  I had a little trouble with that. 

Then I'm in.  Good.  Now I can start work.  But Ron didn't have the expenses, took forever hauling them out.  I had to wait, not very patiently, for quite a while. 

We finally get the report part done, all the information input.  Now I have to make the payment.  So I click on that. 

Sometimes I feel the Holy Spirit is working in my life, this time I clearly heard "Do you have enough in the account?"  I don't know because Ron's bank won't email like mine.  So I had to wait again while he got on the phone and did that... took forever "It kept yapping at me".  NOT enough money to cover our fee, so had to do a transfer. 

I had input all the information and went to submit it and it said my session had expired.  Son of a .... yelled at Ron a little over that... we figured we had to do it again.  There are a lot of numbers in a bank account.  Especially when you have to enter it twice.  Got that... Ron is almost in tears by now headed for his vodka...I am about to throw something.  Got a confirmation page so that is done, also got the email. 

Ron felt better when Cleo came over for treats, and let him pet her a few times.  She was jumpy but she allowed it.  I still don't know how I'm getting her to the vet tomorrow.  It is going to be interesting.  I hope I can get her loaded. 

At best she will be pissed at me and I might get sliced up.  At worst I won't be able to get her.  But that is borrowing trouble.  I know what she likes to eat and I can use that for bait in the trap or a carrier. 

It would be a little embarrassing bringing her in the trap again. 

8 comments:

Anonymous said...

He needs to go to the doctor regardless of if he can be fixed. Both of you should be going to a primary care doctor regularly which you don’t. Ron only sees the pain(druggsss) doc it seems.

Anonymous said...

Get Ron checked out ASAP. They maybe could fix him or do something and at least you know what’s happening and have expectations.

You need to do it.

Heather Knits said...

@ checked out it is doubtful they could do much. He had head injury dementia after the accident already, family history, heavy drinking. He is not going to stop drinking which is about the only thing I think would help.

I will ask about getting a checkup, more times, when he is relaxed or if he expresses anything about this. But he is convinced he is OK since he made a new directory on his hard drive.

Heather Knits said...

@ drugs, there is so much going on with Ron right now that I know of: vitamin deficiency anemia, back issues, etc. The horrible doctor who shouted at him is no longer with the practice, though. Ron is just not compliant with directions (as is his right) so I think it would be a pretty big waste of time and money.

I at least get comprehensive blood work every year so I know I am OK.

Anonymous said...

You just don’t want anyone nosing around in your life like you’ve said in the past, and well that could come back to bite you. What if he has cancer, what if you have cancer? Neither of you see a primary care doctor on a regular basis to know anything that’s going on with you and you constantly self treat and self medicate and guess at everything and you’re not qualified to do so (y’all are disabled and have major brain damage remember? Good enough reason to be seen regularly). And don’t give me the “well the doctor left the practice”. Find another one.

Anonymous said...

Heather, even if they can't treat him it is worth it to know... is this Alzheimer's? Or is it drinking? Or is it just age? You NEED to know.

Heather Knits said...

He is very stubborn, and in massive denial. I admit there is some sort of problem and I will start working on my resume, have him show me how he does the report, etc. According to our consultant there was a vendor with dementia running a place for a while. I believe the powers that be said he was OK to run as long as he showed up, met with his consultant regularly, and filed his reports on time.

I would absolutely forget my current position and get another job, if I didn't think he would stay home drinking all day.

Heather Knits said...

Sorry I wasn't clear: IMO it is a good thing the doctor left the practice, he was, in my opinion, horrible. He would get very angry and shout at Ron, which wasn't professional. The practice is a meat grinder and goes through new doctors regularly. I honestly think anyone could help him.

It is not really a reluctance to let people in my home so much as it is a reluctance to go through a bunch of medical hoops, high copays, etc. And his medical history!

All our functions are normal so I am not worried about cancer, plus, like I said, I had blood tests this spring, they came back fantastic. And they were comprehensive, even my doctor said my lithium level was "pefect". Lithium is good enough for the immune system they use it on chemo patients.

Ron also had blood tests which indicated the ongoing anemia because he won't take the b-12 shot, iron pills, or folic acid. He won't eat enough protein, either. Other than that fine...so his problems are his fault. He doesn't have any genetic conditions causing the blood clots. He refuses to take the anticoagulant as well.

He won't do anything the doctors tell him to do; I really don't see the point of taking him to a doctor so he can continue to defy them. I ask periodically and he says no. If he can pay his own taxes and run the business I think he can make his own decisions.

I am healthy, take my vitamins, get enough protein and sleep, have activities outside of caring for Ron, overall pretty happy. So I am not worried about me. I believe I am coming up on menopause but that will be a good thing in my eyes.