Taken away

I don't know how I feel about this so I will just put it out there. 

My birth mother had a lot of pets, and, I believe, did not manage them properly.  So when child services told her to walk away or face charges she walked... not sure what happened to the pets.  My sister took care of one, found it another home. 

But my Dad had a very strong no pet policy when he met my stepmother.  He forced her to give up her cats (3 I believe) before she moved in.  And she was in a tough spot, she worked full time, had 3 kids, no support from her ex, living in a terrible neighborhood.  Here's Dad in a nice house offering her a stay at home life, but she has to give up the cats. 

I cannot say what I would do in that situation.  For a long time I didn't think much of her for giving them up but she had a small kid and two tweens.  I am sure she was thinking she had to do what was best for the human kids. 

She later told me giving up the cats was her big regret in life, and to never choose a man over a pet.  She loves my Dad but if she had said no he probably would have relented.  He does adore her and would crawl over broken glass for her. 

Fast forward a few years, I am 8 now.  She came running into my bedroom one night, very excited.  She had talked him into getting a parakeet.  I came home from school one day and there she was, a blue parakeet in her cage.  We had fun with her, she liked to sit on the arm of my glasses and peck at the hinge.  My sister taught her to stick her head in a mouth.  It was pretty funny.  We took turns feeding her and changing her water.  I used to love to watch her play in her water bowl. 

She got a friend (also approved by Dad), a few years later, an all white parakeet, also a girl.  When we flew out to CA I had the birds in a cat carrier under my seat, on the airplane. 

About that time a cat showed up at the house, my stepmother snuck him hot dogs which Dad was never supposed to hear about.  This time she did talk Dad into keeping him, if he (the cat) got neutered and declawed.  Dad had bought furniture before I was born and by God he was going to keep that same furniture as long as he could.  He still had it when I moved out. 

Sorry, cat, he got declawed.  So we had a cat and two birds.  My stepmother found a tripod style brass stand for the birdcage and a safe place to put it so the cat wouldn't jump on the cage.  Poor birds. 

About this time, I was in the 6th grade, I caught an escaped parakeet and brought it home.  I knew how to handle a small bird due to my experience at home.  My stepmother took him home.  And then gave him to one of her friends, who let the bird eat a cassette tape and it died a horrible death bleeding internally. 

That was the first bird.  In the 7th grade I had a reputation as someone who liked birds, when I was manic I wouldn't shut up about them, sorry people.  My stepsister introduced me to a classmate of hers who had a slightly deformed bird, I loved him and was given the bird, cage and all.  I kept it in my room for a few days until I was caught and the bird given away again. 

In the meantime, a relative had given me a subscription to "Bird Talk" and I was reading about the joys of bird ownership every month with centerfold photos of birds to boot. 

And it happened again, 9th grade I caught another escaped parakeet.  And it was given to the lady who had killed the 6th grade bird.  At least she kept the cassette tapes away from this one.  I was getting pretty upset by this point, I felt like God kept giving me birds and she kept taking them away. 

I don't see the harm of having a couple parakeets in my bedroom would have caused.  I had an allowance and bird seed is very cheap.  In the 10th grade they had me as a student aide in the high school office.  One day I came in and found a beautiful love bird, in a cage.  I loved it.  A woman's daughter had left home and she didn't want the bird any more.  Notice a theme here? 

She said I could have it, I snuck it in and did not tell anyone about it.  I named it Peaches.  My stepmother found it one day.  "Where did you get it?"  I told her.  She tried to give it back but the woman wouldn't take it. 

Let's take a moment to feel sorry for all the poor unwanted birds that passed through my life.  The man next door had a daughter who bred birds.  Without my permission, my stepmother sold Peaches to the breeder. 

I thought I would at least get the money, but she said no.  In the meantime she has a cat and two birds. 

So, when I met Ron, I didn't have any pets tying me down.  That would have been a big factor for me, because I would have taken any birds with me.  But I didn't have any birds, did I?  Because they had all been taken away. 

My stepmother had a calico when she met my Dad.  Dad only "let" her have two cats.  That was it, no more.  She has zero cats and I have two calicos, a torbie, a gray and white, and a bengal.   Of course I have a lot of responsibility and expense (today was over $200), but I think it is worth it. 

And she can't take them away anymore.  I leave it to you to decide if any of this was "fair".