1. The "sugar daddy" told me this story. As far as he is concerned it had a beautiful, happy, ending. A waitress started working at his restaurant (he is one of those daily regulars, hangs out for hours, etc). She had moved to Houston because her husband had stage 4 cancer. He was a vet. Sugar Daddy (now known as SD) said he would help them fill out all the paperwork for disability, aid for home care, etc. Commendable, I can't fault that. They had an appointment to go do some work one day, she showed up alone and said "I'm done with that man, he cheated on me with one of the aides, who was a friend, so I threw him out. He is on his own". Good for her, I thought. SD was upset by this and kept asking her who was taking care of the man. She said she didn't know, didn't care, he was a liar and a cheat screwing around while she was at work busting her tail to provide for them.
I asked what happened with the other woman and he said she was also married. I said I would have told the husband because he had a right to know he married a whore. SD got very upset by that and scolded me for "ruining someone's marriage". No, I replied, SHE ruined it when she did the sex acts.
I have been not calling him very often (SD) so I contacted him a few months later. He proudly related this story, the cheater had a health crisis and went into the hospital. She did not "help". She shouldn't have to, they were separated. Anyway, the doctors were ready to release him from the hospital but someone had to volunteer to be his caregiver. The other woman was not going to move him into her house. They called around to his family, none of them volunteered. What they did do was call the estranged wife and lay massive guilt trips on her how he was going to die alone without her, how he "was really sorry" etc. And she took him back, resuming her caregiver duties. They got some benefits coming in so SD saw it as a perfect, happy, ending. I almost vomited. That poor woman.
2. This one happened some years ago. I knew a woman I will call Jill from a Facebook group. She did not believe in mental illness, she believed that everything (like my pastor) was simply spiritual and that medication was a tool of the devil. I eventually had to unfriend her for the stance because she kept telling me I was going to hell for taking my meds.
Who are you to judge me? Everyone thinks I am getting high off my meds - hardly. Anyway her daughter had married a stay-at-home loser and had a daughter with him. He did no work and the mother had to work full time in addition to housekeeping and child care. So Jill moved her in next door.
Jill's husband had a stroke that left him vastly diminished mentally, he had the abilities of a small child only. He had a kidney problem and heart trouble and had racked up millions in Medicaid bills. At the end of it, she gave consent to pull ALL his teeth because "It might help with the infection in his blood stream". She kept forcing him into aggressive and abusive treatments progressively worse and worse weeks in ICU, all this for someone who basically couldn't think. Jill reacted to this by doing constant pitiful money grabs.
I have promised Ron, and the cats, they will not suffer. And that means making hard choices I will do it. Absent from the body is home with Jesus.
Anyway, the little granddaughter is watching all this and I am sure it is totally screwing up her love map. As if her parents hadn't done enough.
So, the old man died. It was a pretty big relief for everyone. Then the Jill keeps going on about how bullies are "tormenting" her granddaughter. Turns out they have pampered and coddled this little girl, bought her fancy bedroom sets they could not afford, clothes, toys, etc.
And my favorite: called her "Princess Sugar Pie". Now, I have a family nickname. They call me Miss H. I am fine with that. Ron has given me another nickname. Sometimes other people refer to me by Ron's nickname because he simply never calls me Heather. I don't mind.
But if you ask my name I will introduce myself as Heather. This little girl had been taught to forgo her given name and force everyone to refer to her as "Princess Sugar Pie". Family got angry when the teacher referred to her by the given name. Little girl goes around demanding everyone call her princess, and is very upset when people tell her no. She is 7-8, not a toddler. Accuses them of 'being bullies" because one older boy teased her for not using her "real" name.
Which is not "Princess Sugar Pie".
Can you imagine the ego on that girl? Grandmother utterly OUTRAGED no one is calling her "Princess Sugar Pie" because this is the real world and she ain't that precious. I wouldn't even refer to my cat like that.
I can't help but imagine her going around still demanding everyone call her that. It's like "How to make a narcissist".
Anyway, both those stories have been bugging me lately and I decided to share them.
4 comments:
People have a right to react to stressful situations in ways you don't agree with.
Just like you have the right to react to stressful situations in ways your readers don't agree with.
Does it make you feel better in some way to diminish others?
In the first story, the woman had a perfect right to do whatever she wanted, including taking him back. I just resented Sugar Daddy's smug attitude about it, that it was always the "right" thing for a woman to do. He has cheated on many women and one reason he has had so much trouble with relationships.
In the second story, it was none of her business how I handled my illness and she had NO right to tell me I was in spiritual trouble for doing so. It was torture to keep the husband alive and she admitted at one point it was only because she would lose benefits he got when he died, and was convinced she would lose the house to Medicaid (that one). The whole family raised the little girl to be an arrogant little brat, and then acted all shocked when she got blowback. It was their own fault. It was never stated aloud but in my family nicknames were for family members. I have a stepsister and my parents who refer to me as Miss H. But I don't go around saying that is my name, anymore than I do that with Ron's nickname for me. If someone wants to call me by it I answer, they hear Ron calling me, but I have plenty of people at work read my 'real" name off my badge and refer to me as Heather. I answer to both. But teaching a kid she is a "Princess Sugar Pie and everyone must refer to you as such" doesn't show good logic or understanding of personality disorders. She is a child, like any other child, and no one has to refer to her as a princess.
I like your stories and both people you are talking about in the stories sound like idiots. Too bad the first guy didn't die from his cancer. But maybe one day. As for the second story those parents and grandparents should all be put in some kind of parenting class as that kid doesn't stand a chance in life.
Thank you. Both just really bothered me as the second story saw herself as a victim; first story was a "Happy ending" to the guy telling it. I wonder if the cheater ever even said he was sorry?
It sounded like it was a pretty hopeless case and he was going to die anyway, if I had to guess the wife took him back just to get "the family" off her back.
I told Ron this, with our history if he is dumb enough to cheat I am throwing him out no matter what shape he's in. He made his choice.
Post a Comment