"They make me ashamed I am black"

It seemed so harmless, we just wanted a dinner.  Ron made the trip yesterday.  It would be our first dinner out in weeks.

I encouraged Ron to make it early (1 PM) so we wouldn't run into the difficulties we find with the later-day trips.   As you know, it has been hell for us going anywhere in the afternoon.

Our ride was over an hour late, a driver who is often sullen and dare I say, lazy.  Example, she wanted ME to push Ron up the wheelchair ramp even though that is her job and I was wearing flip flops.  Had I tried to push him, I would have lost my balance and we both would have fallen.  So I refused to do it, she made a big production out of grunting, huffing, and groaning (not THAT hard) as she got him into place.  Then sitting in the driver's seat panting and huffing saying "That was so hard" and "It's so hot out".  I push Ron all the time, it is not "hard" he is only 150 pounds.  It was milder than it was last week, still hot, but not "So" hot.

I mentioned paratransit would be a lot easier for all concerned if they had a simple policy: if you can drive a car, you don't get to ride.  The driver got very upset and said that none of her clients was able to drive a car.  BS.  I have sat there next to a client talking to me about their vehicle and how often they drive it, saving paratransit for "big trips".  People like that need to get off the service.  Blind, wheelchair, slow, head injury - they ride.  All the rest of it "Granny has an ache or pain" - no.  Drive your car.  Otherwise they bog it down for people who cannot and are stuck waiting on the "luxury" clients who use it as a "free ride".  She got very upset over that and said that all of her clients had lost their right to drive, that Medicare paid for the rides (wrong!), etc.  I finally let it drop.  My grandmother drove a car every day until she died, in her 80's. 

We got to the restaurant.  I figured surely we would have a nice meal.  It was about 3 by now (so much for 1) and they seated us at one side of the restaurant next to a very large gathering of adults.  As I sat I heard one of the men literally screaming (friendly) conversation at a man seated 2 feet away.  No one was hearing impaired, they were all just very loud.  The two men shrieked and screamed comments at each other, and, periodically, one of them would stand up and scream at the whole table.  All of it non-aggressive but a very loud and disturbing affect.  The way they carried on you would swear there was a jackhammer right next to them and it was the only way to be heard.

Aside from them, the restaurant was very quiet, so it wasn't necessary.  And, like I told Ron, had it been a fretful baby or toddler, hungry, waiting for food I could have understood some disturbance, but this was people who had already eaten making a scene and loving every minute of it.

Ron began making comments like "Shut up" "No one wants to hear you"  etc.  They continued.  At some point I believe one of them heard Ron because he stood up and screamed a loud comment at the restaurant about how it was so and so's birthday and they were "just celebrating".  They continued.

We ordered our food but the other table kept getting louder, especially when the manager, who apparently knew the loudest one, came out and comped the whole table free desserts.  They really went crazy then.

When our food came the waitress asked if I needed anything, I asked to move across the restaurant because "They are disturbing him".  Truer words never spoken.  Ron was on the verge of saying some unforgivable things.

I told him, if he did, the other party would make a big scene and demand a free meal, and probably get it, too.  I said the only way to "win" that game was not to say anything.

"They make me ashamed I am black" he replied.  We moved across the restaurant and it was much better.  We ate our food, had a couple of diet sodas, talked.  Ron said it was a good thing I moved him when I did because he was about to say some really awful things.  I said it would have just played into the whole victim mentality and they would come out on top - free meals, free publicity, etc.  I mentioned that loud mouth seems to be "someone important" based on the way the manager was sucking up to him and it was wise not to engage.

We paid (left a good tip of course) and went outside so we couldn't hear them at all.  Our ride was late but I expected that.  He finally showed up.  I got Ron loaded.

The problem with Ron today was he had a whole extra hour of drinking at home in the kitchen waiting on the ride, and was so sloppy I made him ride in the wheelchair compartment.  He was just able to ride in the back seat on the way home but had some troubles getting out when we did get home.  He is still pretty loose and I am concerned about getting him into bed.

After we got picked up to go home, we had another pickup, but she had gotten impatient and taken a cab home instead of waiting for her assigned ride.  That will get her a penalty mark.  And another good example of "if you can afford another mode why are you taking paratransit".

Then we picked up a client at a wound care clinic.  Yuck.  I want to boil Ron in listerine now that we are home.  No wonder so many drivers have sanitizer and rubbing alcohol.

I got Ron in the house (not easy) and went to check the mail.  I fed Cleo before we left (on the porch) and she was very happy on the porch when I got home, checked the mail, and came back in the house.  I found something from my health insurance on the porch.  I opened it.  It had a check in there for me.  Which I will absolutely deposit.  I also found the battery tester.  No alarm clock yet.  But it is out for delivery.

So I have $130.  Extra.  Ron paid me back for the batteries and alarm clock, with an extra $25 besides.  So that is awesome.  I just need to get to my bank.  I have about $30 spendable in my account.

I plan to do kettlebells tomorrow.  The outside of one knee was a little creaky today so I didn't want to chance it.  I will probably skip the side lunges tomorrow.

We are going in later so I don't have to get up at the crack of dawn to work out.  Don't get me wrong, I have, and had good workouts out of it, but if I can get up at 7 instead I will do it!

Ron is nodding off in the kitchen but adamant he does not want to go to bed.  So I will just leave him, I took my pills already and can get access to drinks so not worried about that.

Edit: I checked, his alarm clock came.  It is not a talking alarm clock.  It is a standard, complex, alarm clock with a talker button.  His old alarms had all the buttons talk "Time set" "3, 4, 5" etc.  This one does not.  And it is very complicated to set.  It is beyond me right now at my medication.  I probably could have got it but Ron wanted to (understandably) play with it and hit all the buttons, erasing what I had done.  I told him, since it is very clear in saying it does have an "announce on the hour" setting that must be turned off manually - that I didn't do - we were taking the batteries out until we got it figured out.  I can wake him up.

I took my pills, right now I am fairly useless.  I took everything, all at once, to boot.  My brain is full.

We will figure something out.  I don't want Ron to leave his phone on with the alarm set because a couple of times various jackasses from work have called at 1 AM screaming they lost a nickel.  I cannot work the alarm on my phone, it is too complicated and virtually impossible to silence permanently.  My stand alone alarm works pretty well but only has one alarm setting.  I am also on a list online "making" $150K a year.  So I get a lot of spam calls. 

Worst case Walmart has some alarms, or LSS group, we have got alarms from them and Maxi-aids before.  And those alarms worked fine.  I should have just done that, but Amazon has worked well for us on everything else. 

It's just, why does it have to be so hard?  I am just trying to take care of him and the cats.