Socialization

As a teenager I was accused of anti social behavior.  I was in an untenable family situation, I had raging, undiagnosed, bipolar disorder, force fed 40 mg of Prozac a day on top of that (which made the bipolar worse).  Couple that with a rebellion against God and you have a pretty unhappy kid. 

And here I am today trying to socialize 2 feral kittens.  I have had a policy with Spot "Pet while you eat", some sites said to force petting on him at other times but we didn't like that (either of us) so I stopped and let him come to me.  He does. 

So I'd say he's about 80% socialized.  He lets me pet him (willingly), comes over to me with his tail up, meows, rubs against my ankles, etc.  He isn't hiding as much, either, and willingly comes out whenever it's feeding time. 

I slept pretty well last night.  As you may know Ron likes to go to the kitchen in the middle of the night, for vodka.  He sits in his wheelchair and drinks.  Mama cat didn't want to waste an opportunity (none of the cats bother me at night when I am sleeping or trying), and went over to Ron,begging. 

Ron is quite proud of his unofficial title as "treat man".  He began giving her treats when something small rubbed against him.  He looked, it was Spot, meowing and begging for treats, his tail in the air, as Ron petted him ("Heather, he's so small!").  According to Ron he gave them both treats as Spot marched back and forth, rubbing against Ron with his tail up (confident/happy body language).  I was really happy to hear that. 

I woke up with a vicious headache.  I will not be working out today.  I took some of my new Kratom (at this rate I will need to get more pretty soon, I only got the 60 count capsules).  It helped a little, I got up. 

All 5 cats wanted their breakfast.  I fed everyone the appropriate food (nothing of note except Biscuit threw up in his food bowl, I had to get a glove to clean it out and give him fresh) and they munched happily together.  Spot was very social with me, especially compared to a few weeks ago.  Ron told me about last night and I was thrilled for him.  I want all the cats to interact with him. 

I put on my bathrobe and went outside with a bowl of food for Cleo.  I didn't see her at first, she came over from #2.  She crept in sideways, watching me.  I turned my head and said hi to her.  She paused.  Her tail slowly lifted in the air and she said: meow.  That is a big step socially.  It was a small, quiet, meow.  She gave me a couple more as she came up on me. 

And then #2 put up their garage door, making a lot of noise, banging sounds, talking loudly. That was it for Cleo and she ran off.   But I saw it as a big step. 

I have been looking up feral kitten videos.  Most of them focus on "taming" forcing them into purritos, holding them in your lap and force petting them, etc.  That looks like rape to me.  It's just not how I think I should approach Cleo EVEN ASSUMING I could get my hands on her, which I can't.  I have put one finger on her back, twice.  Each time she jumped, turned around, hissing at me, and ran off. 

I'm going to tell you about Frosty.  First, I need to tell you about Bubba (the black cat).  Bubba loved friends and brought home other cats to live with us on two occasions.  The first one was Frosty.  He just showed up one day, with Frosty, meowing at Frosty.  He was clearly reassuring Frosty I was OK when I went outside, but Frosty ran away from me with tuna in my hand.  Ran away.  From tuna.  I did a very slow process of putting the food at the edge of my property and standing on the porch while Frosty ate, then working it closer and closer, slowly petting him, then holding the door open and inviting him in with a big bowl of tuna right inside the house, etc.  At the end of it Frosty became a lap cat and loved to spend hours on me every night as I watched TV. 

So, I've done this.  Just not with a kitten.  Frosty was by all accounts around 10 when he came to me. 

So far I have basically gone out on the porch and put the food by my feet.  Spot came and ate.  I slowly began petting him and getting him used to being handled, until I picked him up and brought him in the house.  I don't pet him if he doesn't want it.  I call him and put my hand out, if he comes over I pet him and give him a treat.  I also pet him while he eats, inside the house.  He approaches me on his own, and Ron - which makes me really happy as Spot was afraid of the wheelchair. 

Cleo has proven more stubborn, it was a huge deal for her to be in the same yard as me.  She has worked over to eating next to me without petting, but if I sneeze or make a sudden move she bolts.  You can see why I get so angry at the #6 kids for chasing her.   Today she meowed at me, which is more domesticated than feral, and her body language is warming up.  I am proving myself to her, I am safe, I am consistent, I am a feeder.  I won't hurt her or allow her to be harmed (except for the spay),    I may get her in the house after all, it remains to be seen.  If I can, I will.  I don't want her outside with the real ferals (#6 children). 

Other than that the cats have been unremarkable.  Mama cat likes to go out in the garage so we are letting her for now (it is attached to the house), we keep the door propped with a dumbbell. 

The headache is not getting better,even though I took more Kratom.  I believe I am working on a migraine so I am going to lie back down.  I filled my primary purpose, feeding/watering the cats and helping Ron with some things. 

I just need to be upright and functional when my grocery delivery arrives.