Seared

Ron was very distraught today, like 99% of America.  I wasn't. 

I got to thinking why.  Of course we have 'the usual" - Dad's office shot up when I was 13, I didn't know if Dad was alive for hours. 

Here's the original:  ESL shooting.  I was already extremely depressed, this put me into the hospital about a month later.  So, it's pretty safe to say old "Dick" nearly killed me, too.  I still have a grudge on that.  I still remember what it was like, watching the TV (Dad was away from work, meeting with the my doctor about my depression - if I hadn't been bipolar he would have been in the middle of the shooting), waiting and waiting to see if Dad was coming home.  The relief when he did, and the sight of Mom hugging him as she told him what happened.   Since he's still alive, the shooter, I pray for him, grudgingly, every day. 

I also thought of another incident:  Serial killer shot up my hometown when I was 5.  "August 18, 1979: Franklin shot and killed a black man seated in a Burger King in Falls Church, Virginia. Franklin confessed to the murder on videotape."  Boy, he really wouldn't like Ron and I, would he? 

I think the 1988 incident really seared my heart.  After that, no shooting incident could shock me.  If my Daddy wasn't safe at work, no one was safe anywhere.  I also recall the McDonald's shooting in the 80's as well - how many of us thought "If you're not safe at McDonald's, where are you safe?" 

I think, after that, I developed such a thick layer of scar tissue nothing could shock me.  A constant diet of workplace and school shootings has rendered me numb. 

I can't wait to get off this planet on the Rapture Express.  Every now and then, people ask me, "Why do you think we're in the end times?  Things have been going on like this for milennia." 

Have they?  Really?