Wednesday, December 19, 2012

Not that depressed

My aunt recently mentioned they were passing a funeral processsion.  I never really saw them until I got to Houston, and then I thought "What a waste of money". 

After Ron's accident, his brother planned Ron's funeral aloud (2 limos, but I don't think they were saving me a seat!), as I told him, "Ron's not dead!".  The guy wanted a theatrical production. 

Happily, I will be planning Ron's funeral now, when he has one, assuming we don't get raptured.  Ron's easy.  I'll have it at the church, invite all our drivers, punch bowl, food, and a slide show to "One More Child" by Earth Wind and Fire (as requested).  Pastor will preach a salvation message and I'll hand out Bibles.  Then I'll donate his body to science, if they want it.  If they don't I'll cremate him. 

I'm pretty much the same, except "Built 4 This" by Thi'sl, and they'll have to get their own Bibles off the table.  Body goes to science, if they want it.  If not, cremate. 

I don't want a big, wasteful, circus.  My loved ones can celebrate me by sharing my Bibles and evangelism. Save the procession, people have to get to work. 

I'll be in Heaven anyway.  I won't care. 

[no, I'm not THAT depressed, just thinking about this lately]

1 comment:

Melanie said...

My husband always says, and he's perfectly serious-that when he dies, just throw him off the Bay Bridge into the Back Bay of the Gulf Of Mexico and feed the shrimp. He comes from a long long line of shrimpermen (that's what they call themselves *shrug*) but he only ever did any shrimping as a pastime (I was along, the only other person-I didn't find it so amusing!).

But even if that wasn't illegal, his two sons are pillars of the community and would never have that. So it will probably be the works, though I know he'd prefer donations to St Jude's Children's Hospital in lieu of flowers.

I'm not even sure I'll be able to be there, though family pride says I must make the effort. This man is the love of my life and the center of my life for app 30 yrs now, hopefully much longer, and I will be devastated without him. After all these years I don't know what his religious beliefs really are-he's very private about his inner life, even to me. He was raised Catholic-lapsed for many years. He knows I'm a born-again Christian and that I worry, to put it mildly, about his eternity and him not being with me in Heaven. He's always been a better person, in his own way, than most people he's encountered who profess Christianity. I've explained about grace, faith, works, fruit of the spirit, sanctification, etc, but he's a very pragmatic person-"show me the money". He started supporting his family when he was 14, including his mother and a disabled sister. He was the "strong one" of his family, and as all his siblings died off, even the older ones, he's transferred that sense of duty to various people he somehow "collects" as he goes through life.

All I know for sure (he says, anyway) is that he's not an atheist. He's extremely intelligent book- and streetwise, and never believes anything just because anyone says so.

This weighs on my mind at all times, whether at the back or to the foreground.

I suppose all I can do is continue to pray and try to be as generous and non-materialistic as he is, so he'll see Jesus' influence though me. That's a tough one, because I honestly haven't met many people who combined the strength and generosity which he does, no matter what they profess. (But he doesn't tolerate fools gladly-you have to pay more attention to what he does than to what he says if you want to recognise the good in him).

Rght now I can only pray that there are things working in him of which I'm unaware, but I'll never have peace of mind while I don't know. I pray he sees fit to open up about these things one day before it's too late. I know if he'd only be open, the Holy Spirit is mighty to work in his heart and and make him see it's as simple as faith.