I rant about the homeless now

Well, after I put the groceries away Ron woke up and wanted to listen to music.  Since he pays the electric and the internet it seemed only fair.  I did leave the room during one song I hate.  Then he went and drank for a while.  I got him to eat a little but he didn't want much, it would affect the alcohol. 

He has 2 really bad traits and I suppose one of them is my fault.  He wanted me to read him articles about alcohol - before he developed a serious problem.  How it was absorbed and how it was metabolized.  I happened to read a line that said much alcohol is absorbed through the lining of the mouth, which has since led to Ron taking a chug and holding it in his mouth as long as possible, while breathing through his nose.  Not what I envisioned during my innocent research!  I had hoped hearing about it would temper his drinking, not amplify it.  I am just glad he does not know about the enema trend. 

The second thing, he won't eat until he is completely drunk, because he feel food tempers the alcohol "soak" and he doesn't get drunk as fast.  So he won't eat, is malnourished, everyone, I feel, is pointing a finger at me "Look at you all fat while this poor man has vitamin deficiencies".  I feel like I have to beg him to eat sometimes.  He doesn't have an active metabolism because he basically lives in bed.  So what few calories he gets are all coming from alcohol.  He doesn't "feel" hungry but he is not getting the fats, proteins, minerals, and vitamins he needs.  I worry about this. 

Anyway, he made a huge mess by the time I did get him to eat and had a blackout.  I gave up on him and laid down for a nap. 

He made some noise but I got an hour or so anyway.  At least I can sleep. 

When I woke up he had gotten himself to bed.   Safely. 

I will have to get his shirt to wash it, though, he got bean sauce all over it.  I don't mind food on the clothes if it's just eating while sober, he makes a mess, I am OK with that.  Frankly, I am just happy he can sort of feed himself.  Drunk stains, not so crazy but I will wash because "dirty" clothes makes me look bad. 

Then I got online.  Should be fun, right?  I have been bickering in a "homeless" thread.  I will try to compact my view. 

First of all, I am the only person who has had a homeless family member.  At the end of her life, my mother was living out of her car.  She didn't want rules, she didn't want her medication.  All she did want was the bottle.  With typical results of ending up homeless. 

I said I do not feel sorry for people who abuse drugs and refuse needed medication.  They have victimized themselves.  They victimize their families, and society.  They are not victims.   They are victimizers. 

I said every homeless person I met fell into that category, and I have met dozens.  They were all either/or mentally ill/addicted.   Many had both conditions.  It is extremely common on the street. 

Which would make you think, mentally ill people would say "Shit, I don't want to end up like that, I'm taking the pills!"  Pretty much what I say every day at pill time. 

But apparently I am an unsympathetic bitch and one person said they hope I become homeless.  Nice folk, right?  It's always the woman.  Men can be jerks but the women really stab you, in my experience. 

I have made my point, though.  It is easy to see someone on the side of the road as you drive past in your car.  You are in your warm and cozy car.  No one is invading your personal space and all you smell is your air freshener.  You see the cardboard sign and you think "Oh, poor thing". 

I have had to guide Ron, back when he could walk, around piles of feces on the ground and away from urine puddles.  I am accosted at bus stops, my personal space invaded.  I have to smell them and have had a bleeding limb shoved in my face while I was sitting down (they wanted money).  I have had to worry about bugs and personal safety, begging the bus to come in my head.  It has been unpleasant to say the least. 

They don't have any real hands on experience.  If they did, they would have a vastly different view.  Now, I don't have a problem feeding people.  Jesus did that.  I don't have a problem with detox/rehab programs, which I think are extremely necessary.  Jesus would help with that, I am sure.  Let's streamline the mental health system so people can get back on their medication easily.  But I don't see the need to "save" people who don't want to change the behaviors that got them out on the street.  Demonstrate a willingness to put down the bottle and take your mental illness medication, then we'll talk. 

I think I am a reasonable person but maybe not.  My whole life I have dealt with addicts so I am pretty burned out on them.  I said something to Ron one day about my next husband, after he dies,  Ron got very offended and said he wasn't going anywhere. 

I think I pushed a button.