I have to "deal".

I'm a messy housekeeper.

Ron teased me when I got the vacuum today; asking if I was an alien.  Things are messy.  I know he would like things to be different.

However, I just have a really hard time figuring out what to do, when to do it, and where things ought to go.  I can figure out the "how" pretty clearly, the rest is all a big fog.

Part of it's the Fetal Alcohol.  Part of it's the medication, I think.  I tend to be foggier - but other people seem to find it "cute" - which is a lot better than the horrible negativity "before" medication.  No one found me "cute" before!  [laugh]

I'll take the dumb, and the cute.  Kind of like the meme: this one I love, because it is SO me.

In fact, I'll tell Ron that sometimes "I has a dumb".  He gets it.  A little frustrated, but not at me, just the fact that I have to "deal".

And that's it - I have to deal with brain damage, mental illness, and some very strong medication.  But, that's all I've known - brain damage and mental illness.  Praise God for the medication.

Anyway the problem with having high-functioning brain damage - I appear normal, so people expect it.  Well, I can't give what I don't have!

I was apologizing to Ron today, saying I wished I could be that wonderful housekeeper, and he said "It doesn't matter.  You do a lot, and you make it look easy.  I asked for clear pathways, and floors, and you do it.  I could get out the backdoor.  I never fall over things.  I'd love it if you could do a few more things, but I accept this is all you can do, sometimes".

Thank you, Ron.

It's nice to be understood.