Wednesday morning

 Hopefully I explained my remark earlier about failed marriages.  God knows mine wasn't much of a treat.  One thing I see with Jack in particular, if a man I date has kids they are likely to have MAJOR issues with me in his life.  That is something I would rather avoid.  

Speaking of Jack we went through the drive through this morning.  He was thrilled to hear he could "get" a combo, I got a combo, and I had money left.  I am sure he enjoyed it, I will hear all about it Thursday I am sure.  I had plenty of time to eat my food before work.  

I had an easier boss today, she left me alone to do my job. 

Next day.  

Torrential rain as I was leaving work so I took the cab.  Not sorry about that but that means I have to be careful as my emergency trips are gone.  

I slept pretty well, too.  I remember wondering if I would ever sleep again after Ron died, just lie down and rest for 8+ hours.  Now I do a lot of nights so that is good.  We did get more rain in the middle of the night, though.  

I bought more cat food yesterday so I don't have to feel bad about feeding them today.  

I went back to bed for a while and was thinking about presents.  I am slowly building up some gifts for my parents.  I have what I consider to be a good amount right now but I might get some cookies for Dad and I lost my tape again so I will need to get that before I ship it.  I am not sure what I will do for my aunt and she reads this so I won't tell when I do.  I have a few ideas.  

But I was thinking about gifts.  My #1 favorite gift was craft stuff.  I loved all  that.  I have dabbled in many crafts, crochet, knitting, lace making (fine needle crochet), I wanted to try tatting, spinning yarn, beading, you name it.  So I loved anything along those lines.  One of my all time favorite Christmas gifts was a small weaving loom.  

But I always got dolls.  Now when I was little I really enjoyed stuffed animals.  Like a lot of kids I had "my" stuffed animal.  When I woke up from eye surgery I wanted my stuffed animal.  I was coaxed into giving it up when I was about 7 and it was done in a clean and loving way so I am OK with that.  But I had other stuffed animals, bears, etc.  I liked getting those but one year my birth mother was manic, I told her I liked stuffed animals, and she bought me a whole trunk full!  My adoptive mother talked me into keeping a few and donating the rest to toys for tots.  The tots got some good stuff that year!  My birth mother was erratic, some years I would get a lot of gifts from her but most years I got nothing.  

One thing I remember from my 10th birthday someone sent me flowers in my birth mother's name and I thought it was great she had remembered me.  Were they from her?  Who knows.  But I liked the thought they were.  By the way I don't like cut flowers now because they die.  I would rather have a nice bouquet of fake flowers like I did for my wedding.  

But I kept getting dolls.  I am an engineers daughter.  I wanted legos.  I wanted an erector set.  I wanted craft stuff.  I didn't want another doll.  They all got donated eventually.  And I had to write a gracious thank you note "Oh she is so pretty I can't sleep without her" sort of thing.  That's why I prefer a list then I know I'm getting exactly what I want.  I don't want someone wasting their money on me.  

Gift giving is a love language but that can be small, a while back a friend brought me a Mountain Dew.  that was very sweet.  You can bet I drank it.  I gave her a pepper spray, she leaves the store at night at midnight and I feel better about her in the parking lot now.  That's all I can afford but we both feel better her having it.  

I think I sound ungrateful, I hope I'm not.  It is raining right now so no trip to the grocery store.  Not yet.  And I will have to wear my waterproof shoes when I do go.  I am glad we are not dealing with drought conditions that can be difficult for a foundation.  And there are a million things to worry about with a house including foundation issues.  

#6 kid is having a tantrum in their driveway.  It is embarrassing.  Ron and I always said we would be strict, and spank if necessary.  Not a lot of young parents are doing that these days.  

I remember one time I worked at Target, I was a cashier.  We had a candy display by the checkout it went from ground level up to about shoulder level.  Kids would always ask their parents if they could have candy, Mom would say no.  The kid would open it anyway (milennial age).  The parent would sigh, hand it to me to scan, and then GIVE IT  BACK to the kid.  Teaching them that disobedience is  rewarded.  One time and one time only: the mother handed the candy  to me, and then, firmly, said THROW IT AWAY when you're done.  Yes, ma'am, I said promptly and threw it away.  The kid started wailing and the mother grabbed him and said "We're going to talk when I get home, but I told you no and NO MEANS NO every time!"  The kid sniffled a little but looked up at her with a lot more respect.  

Ron "looked" with his hands, and when he was able to shop with me he would "look" at the candy display by the checkout to tease me.  He didn't like candy he was just pulling my chain.  

I used to love Reese's and then moved on to Snickers but I don't eat candy now.  I just had some walnuts that was it.  

Plan is to take my shower, do my God Time, get dressed and out the door, go to Asian grocery and get sesame oil, go to main grocery and get everything else.  It should be an interesting day.  

That's it for now.