Monday, May 27, 2019

The rest of Monday

I think I got a taste of how some of you feel. 

I will go ahead and tell it and then backpedal to my day. 

I was on a message board, we were talking about what qualifies a person as disabled.  I said it really teed me off when someone with disabled plates, hang tag got an attitude about having to wait on Ron, who is so obviously disabled.  I could understand if he looked and moved normally.  But he is in a wheelchair and clearly had a stroke in addition to being blind. 

Someone (not me) said people with drug and alcohol issues shouldn't get disability.  Social Security handed down that edict quite some time ago.  Someone else actually said I didn't understand alcoholics, that many of them "need" it for pain, or to sleep.  The same damned excuses Ron has been giving for years now.  I almost popped a blood vessel. 

I quickly countered I had heard that for years, but empirical evidence showed he was in just as much pain after drinking.  He was just buzzed on top of it.  He didn't remember the pain because of the alcohol but it was still there.  I also disproved the "sleep" issue.  He can sleep just fine without alcohol, even in a new place. 

I had a lot to say, which I won't repeat.  Basically: I loathe drunks, I can't ABIDE their excuses.  I see them as weak morally and a danger to themselves and others.  Only God can love them. 

That's pretty much it.  But my reaction on hearing those excuses reminded me of some of the responses I have gotten on here.  To whatever extent, I get it. 

I still have about 10K views a month.  Interestingly enough I am popular in Norway. 

So, back to my day: I took a shower and shaved my legs today, so I don't have to do it at 4 AM tomorrow.  I watched a little TV and took a nap. 

Torbie laid down with me but left while I slept.  But I got the cuddles so I was happy. 

She is such a good cat.  She is a true gift and one of the reasons I believe God loves me, He gave me her. 

I got up, drank some caffeine lemonade, that helped.  I watched some TV and read a fitness book I found.  I will be doing some cleaning once I get dressed.  I found one dumbbell handle - I can use that working out and save myself some serious money, for a while. 

My back is getting stronger on my weight training program, and I am about out of dumbbells, so glad I found this and I can make a heavier weight.  It is really important for me to have a strong back with the home care I do. 

Speaking of, Ron was making a lot of pain noises.  I checked on him, he was taking a pain pill, which he had forgotten.  He went in the kitchen and drank. 

He has been very affectionate today, saying all sorts of wonderful things but I have to take it with a grain of salt.  If I believe that, I have to believe all the horrible stuff he says.  But I am glad he is feeling positive about me. 

He drank a lot.  I won't go into details but he does some very unattractive things when drinking.  I hate to see it. 

He got pretty soaked and wanted to go back to bed.  I took him, he got in pretty well.  He is camped out there now. 

His shirt is a total loss but I will help him put on another one for the doctor tomorrow.  That's why he bought me the washer. 

I am happy I don't need to buy dumbbells but I will need to buy some racks for the garage, and put everything on them,before I move forward with anything.  I am happy I have better access to my dumbbells but it cost me a fair amount of space.  I have the Olympic (huge) barbell on my squat rack, I may take it off and put it on the floor by the wall, that will give me more room. 

But for now I'm going to clean near the door of the computer room and see if I can't find that dumbbell handle.  I can't see me getting rid of it.  I just need to locate it. 

I have an old suitcase I kept for Torbie, she likes to scratch on it, and takes a lot of joy in it.  I will empty it out and keep it for her.  It is pretty shredded, I will most likely get rid of it after she dies. 

Hopefully that won't be for a while.  So, Ron is in bed.  Trips made for tomorrow.  I just need to do some organizing.  I think it will help with some of the tension I've had from Ron's behavior all day.   I also need to figure out dinner. 

I am pretty worn out for a day off. 

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

Ron does not drink because he is in pain (you have said and so has he that the pain pills remove the pain - when he takes them). He drinks because of his own mental demons and will never stop. Even if all his pain was gone tomorrow and he didn't have to take pain pills he would still get blackout drunk. It is unfortunate but true. Scary when you start lying to yourself about why he does what he does. I guess it makes it easier to deal with. At least you are channeling your energy toward something positive with your exercise and getting stronger.

Heather Knits said...

Oh, I agree. No one "has" to drink.

Whatever the issue they have a medication for it. PTSD, depression, mania, OCD, pain, you name it.

People drink because they are addicted, plain and simple.