But I was thinking tonight about something, how angry Ron would get whenever I got a compliment. He wanted me to look good, but not too good.
I'm not talking about dressing provocatively I really only did that for him when we were dating.
But if someone gave me a compliment when we were out he would start tearing me down verbally the minute we were alone. I didn't put it together until tonight, not that long ago.
He would get absolutely purple if someone noticed I was losing weight and said something nice about it. He would say things like "You are fat on the inside" etc. "You're just going to gain it back" he said that one more times than I can count.
One thing I realized talking to Buddy recently I would love to have a workout partner, go to the gym together, egg each other on, motivate each other, encourage good food habits. Maybe get him (whoever he would be) signed up for Carb manager too and we could look at each other's food logs...if that isn't too creepy.
But a team mate not someone with a scourge.
And it is OK to look good, to take care of myself. God wants me to present myself in a good, modest, way. He wants me to have fun with my appearance.
Does that mean I'm going to wear makeup? Probably not. I do have to walk around and wait outside in the humid Houston summers that's going to kill pretty much any makeup except maybe a tinted lip balm.
But the world's not going to end if I do.
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