But he's blind...

I don't believe in typecasting. 

Black men aren't all thugs, rappers, or athletes.  White guys aren't all computer geeks. 

Not every blind guy is a pervert; but I've met my fair share.  I have a theory on that.

Admittedly, I have girl parts.  I like men, specifically, I like my husband.  So I don't know how the male mind works. 

However, some men "look".  The "nice" ones are discreet and don't make me feel used. 

What if the man's blind?  Well, some of them become gropers.  Yeah.  You heard that. 

"You'd be amazed" Ron told me "At the trouble we got into at the school for the blind, finding ways to get into trouble."  One thing I found particularly troubling, the teenagers (I think they "had" to be 15) were allowed to check the book "Girls and Sex" out of the library.  It was a very graphic sex manual. 

A lot of people think the blind are more "spritual" than that - they aren't. They are human just like everyone else.  And if you're reading this for the first time I am not blind.  I am married to a blind man, though. 

So, here's a guy with an interest in "checking out" women.  How does he do that?  Well, in some cases they become gropers.  You said that, Heather. 

I know, offhand, about 10 male blind friends of Ron who were not.  But I also knew at least 4 guys who were.  They would hug me and move in for full body contact as they did so.  They would grind up against me in a strip club fashion.  Actually that would make 5 gropers. 

One guy, a co worker and no one Ron knew, used to put his hand on my butt, right over the crack, as I walked him places.  Everytime he did it I would stop, take off his hand, and scold him.  Then he would go back to doing it. 

It ended with a stern warning one day, and me leaving him on sidewalk at the wrong side of a very busy intersection.  "I warned him" I told my boss "I told him if he put his hand on my butt one more time..."

"But he's blind!" my sighted boss replied  "He didn't know his hand was on your butt."  I pushed my glasses up and scoffed. 

"Tony" I told him "I'm married to a blind man.  He knew where his hand was at all times.  He's a pervert and a harasser.  I could file sexual harassment charges, but I won't because I don't want to hassle you.  I have asked him repeatedly to stop, and he won't.  You know what that means as regards harassment...."  I let him think on that  "But like I said, I'm not doing that.  I'm going to drop this on two condtions.  One, you only have a man walk him around.  He never feels up the men.  And, two, I'm done with him.  He may be blind, and I know blind, but I'm not helping him anymore."  My boss agreed. 

Funny thing, too, none of the men ever complained about getting felt up. 

Most of the other guys I met casually, one time meeting, went on the "ick" list and done. But an old schoolmate of Ron's happens to live "fairly" nearby.  He rides the paratransit service. 

He used to travel everywhere with a girlfriend, who became a wife.  I don't know how that ended, but he rides alone now.  He generally rides in the front seat. 

The usual paratransit ride is a paratransit minivan with a wheelchair conversion in the back row.  It seats 1 wheelchair, 4 clients, and a driver.  I covet the front seat due to some unpleasant experiences in the back. 

For instance, a couple of the slower guys "like" me and pester me constantly if we happen to ride together.  Some people don't bathe, or wear too much perfume, or God forbid, have open sores on their arm and it's pressed up against my bare arm. 

I'd rather sit in the front. 

First come, first served, though.  If you get there first I'm fine with it. 

We hadn't seen him in years.  Then we saw him riding by himself a few months ago.  Ron sat behind "Jonny" who sat in the front seat.  I sat behind the driver.  Good thing. 

I didn't think much when Jonny reached his arm back and rested it on Ron's knee, caressing it.  I found it moderately creepy and a little wierd, but he's blind... 

Ron looked over at me, with a WTF expression.  He picked the hand of his knee and shoved it back into the frontseat area.  "Don't touch me, man." 

Jonny kept reaching back, going under his pant leg at the ankle, trailing up Ron's bare leg, etc.  Ron treated it as a joke as I got progressively more pissed.  We finally got rid of the guy. 

"He's just trying to freak me out" Ron said.  "He wants me to get upset and object." 

I thought, glad I don't know anyone like that and left it. 

Jonny did this another time.  I finally said "If you touch my husband one more time I will get out my stun gun and zap you."  I don't have a stun gun.  The driver sat up a little, ready for the show!   Jonny stopped. 

A third occasion we got picked up, and the driver asked me to sit in the back.  "We're getting the pervert" he said.  "I don't want him feeling me up while I'm driving.   If he sits behind me he'll feel me up."  The driver went on to tell us that Jonny is well known as a groper, especially of women.  Apparently he likes to run his hand up their leg and rest it on their thigh as he talks to them.  Some object, some don't.  "They all hate it, though" he said "You can see it in their eyes." 

They probably don't object because they think he doesn't know any better, being blind. 

Today Ron went to the liquor store by himself.  That's the rule now, he's fine with it.  He was playing a comedian he had on a flash drive, for the driver.  Apparently Jonny objected. 

Ron told him "You're a damned hypocrite.  You don't want to hear the f-word because you say you're a Christian?  What about feeling everyone up?  Where is that in the Bible?  You're a pervert and a hypocrite!"  He went on for a bit apparently - after the accident, when Ron gets going even I can't stop him. 

I can stop him - quicker - though.  Apparently the driver just enjoyed the show. 

So, hopefully that will be the end of the groper.  If he touches me I warn him, then I will hurt him enough to remember. 

Please, if someone, who happens to be blind, is touching you repeatedly in a way that makes you uncomfortable SAY SOMETHING.  It is not OK.  It is not "because they're blind".  It's because they're an asshole and they will continue to molest people until someone makes them stop. 

Thanks for reading.