The cup

I think I was riding a small mania and now I'm crashing, starting to get more depressed.  I've got the same life I had a week ago, but brain chemicals have decided it's worth getting depressed. 

We had a pretty standard day.  I got up, took a shower, found more bruising on the outside of my left leg - how did I land on the floor?  I didn't hurt my back, head, arms, or hands so that's good but I must have gone down like a pretzel.  I remember my legs wobbling as I went down. 

Anyway, I got up and got ready for work.  I dressed in black and wore my black steel toed sneakers - my foot feels better in them and I can move around pretty freely. 

The driver was early and very aggressive about honking, and even called us.  She was 5 minutes early.  Ron said he was ready but not going out until the pickup time, to "teach her a lesson" "But I'm not like that other guy who made us all wait half an hour".  Even I felt she was a little excessive.  The lights are on in the house, people are moving around, your client is coming out.  It's only 5 minutes. 

We went to the warehouse.  Ron mentioned the mark of the beast and she started going on about how doctors are implanting the mark of the beast into people when they do procedures.  Whatever they're doing (and I doubt they are just shoving equipment into people), they're not doing the mark of the beast. 

1.  The MOTB is taken willingly.  Those who don't take it are executed.  That's not happening currently. 
2.  The MOTB happens after the rapture.  That has not happened yet. 
3.  Taking the MOTB involves worship of the antichrist.  He hasn't appeared on the scene yet. 
4.  The MOTB is in the right hand or the forehead ONLY.  Not other body parts.  Not "Five of them implanted when they did a breast cancer biopsy"

I didn't argue with her, Ron tried, a little, but she realized we didn't agree and clammed up.  Personally?  I thought she and her friends needed a good antipsychotic. 

But, as I learned with Ron's family, it's always difficult to mix ignorant patients/family and the medical profession.  They don't understand what is happening to them, or why, and they often see "whatever" as an opportunity to get "lots" of pain meds. 

One of the nicest compliments I ever got was from a doctor "I don't have to dumb things down for you".  I saw that as high praise, and worked to be an informed family member. 

Anyway, we got to the warehouse, early.  We were early, of course, so we had to wait, but they let us come in before opening and sit at a table.  When it was time, they told us it was OK to shop. 

I did the shopping, I forgot the Pop-tarts but they aren't where they used to be.  I still have some, anyway.  Sales of everything have been down a lot so I didn't buy a whole lot. 

I got everything and Jack came.  I asked him about his arm.  "It's hanging on" he said.  I was sorry to hear it was still bothering him.  "At least it's not hanging off!"  He laughed at that. 

He said (later) he has just about got the cart attendants "trained" how he likes things stored in the truck.  Good to hear. 

When we got to work, the bottled vendor was frozen again.  That put the cap on a very bad mood, for Ron.  I got the stuff and tried the procedure to fix it, hitting buttons in a special test mode on the machine.  It didn't work. 

I put the stuff away, I didn't really need to stock so I didn't focus on that.  I helped Ron with his stocking and found a coin jam in #2.  I told Ron about it.  He got angry at me and told me he didn't mess up.  I told him to go look at it and then talk to me about it.  He fixed it. 

Ron wanted to leave so I put him outside. 

I ate a bag of chips and drank a sparkling water (I am pretty much off caffeine and aspartame).  I started thinking.  When the repairman came out, he had wiggled 'the cup", when he was fixing it.  Maybe I should try wiggling the cup. 

I did.  It sank down to the lowest level, like it should.  I closed the machine, and it went back into place!  I did a test vend, and it worked!  I called Ron, he was very happy to hear about it.  He had already called the repairman. 

We probably need a new cup, which is $260 + labor.  Ouch.  But if we need it, we need it.  I think we should wait a little while and see.  But it's Ron's business. 

I'm like the old story about behind every successful businessman is a woman.  That's me.  I might use that in a job interview one day. 

Anyway, we came home.  We fixed 2 vending machines, troubleshot the bottled vendor (needs a new cup, maybe), got all the inventory into the stockroom and rotated.  I even talked to Ron about some bills that came in.  I didn't want to talk to him about it when he was drunk.  I finally got him in a good moment. 

We came home and I took a nap.  Torbie joined me, my favorite cuddle ever!  She slept by my head - my absolute favorite!  I use a lot of exclamation points when I write about Torbie!  I got up and did my God Time. 

Then I got on the computer, not much happening, I think a lot of people are out of town.  I called my Dad but they didn't pick up, probably out of town (they have a cell phone but I don't think they like to talk on the phone while he's driving). 

I left a message,and will call tomorrow.  I will emphasize: Bibles came, fixed a vending machine.  I will also mention my fall but only in passing. 

The canker sore on my tongue is getting better, thank God.  That was almost worse than the bruises. 

Biscuit is lying on my foot.  He's a good boy. 

They found the catnip mouse (all 3 of them) and had a grand old time batting it all over, biting it, and licking it.  They love their catnip.  Bubba really didn't care for catnip, and I don't think Frosty did either, it's hard to remember (Frosty died in 2009).  I have a nice photo album, though.  Frosty  I like the photo of him and Ron with the treats. 

So I had a bunch of inebriated animals at my house, but no drama.  Baby Girl wanted me to pet her tummy, but really wanted to bite me, too.  I stopped when she pushed me away with her back legs. 

I plan to go to bed early tonight, I don't know if it will be noisy or not tomorrow.  People don't seem do Easter Egg hunts at home anymore.  I know our church is doing one at a park tomorrow. 

We don't have any trips tomorrow so I will focus on cleaning the washer, and the house.  Have a good one, I am praying for you. 

A little stiff and achy

Yesterday was pretty quiet, I just stayed home and tried to "recup" from my splat.  It wasn't bad, as things go. 

A friend at work fell over his cat, down a flight of stairs, and landed on his hands, breaking both wrists.  He had to have surgery for that, and was out of work for months. 

I just have some bruising on my legs, and a rather stiff right foot.  I'm just a little stiff and achy. 

Anyway, yesterday was pretty quiet, except we went out for Indian food.  It is a nice little restaurant.  I was a little dressier than normal: I destroyed my flip flops when I fell, so I had to wear my sandals.  We had a good time, and came home. 

We bought the driver an appetizer, and she loved it.  She got out of her vehicle and asked the owner what it was, and he told her.  She also said the image of the chicken (he has images of the food posted outside, on the glass windows) looked really good.  I'm betting she'll be back. 

Good, I would love to drum up a lot of business for them.  I posted a very good review on Google so I've done what I can. 

We came home.  I went to bed early. 

I'm not sleeping well.  Not because my legs and knees are black and blue (I would post an image but I haven't shaved my legs yet), but I have a canker sore on my tongue, I am a mouth breather and it hurts at night, wakes me up.  The bruising doesn't help, when I roll over, either.  It's just an accumulation of small things right now. 

However, everything above the waist is fine, back, arms, hands, head.  I didn't have to to go the hospital and I didn't have to explain my bruises at work (I am wearing jeans, like I was before anyway).  I can do our supply run tomorrow and I was able to work today. 

I slept fitfully last night and woke up late.  I took a shower and did my God Time later (before I got online).  We went to work. 

We had been gone for 3 days.  I was expecting "blown out" (empty) vending machines.  They were not empty.  That was disappointing.  If we're not selling then we're not making money.  I stocked what I could.  Ron had slow sales on canned soda, but the bottles did very well.  I helped him with them. 

We did our inventory and got an idea what we'd need for tomorrow.  I have been cleaning out the racks in the stockroom so I have a lot more room to store inventory now.  I had been stacking the chips on top of the Dr Pepper, which caused inconvenience for Ron.  Glad I did it, I don't know if I have a very small mania (I'm not talking a lot, or spending more than usual, and sleeping OK considering), or I just got motivated, but the racks look a lot better. 

The trick is filling the shelves back up, or the other vendor might want them.  Space is at a premium in this stockroom. 

So, busy day tomorrow.  I don't know if Ron planned anything for after work but it's too late to do it now, if he wanted.  I'll just have to look. 

Nope, just work and home.  I will have to try something out of my delicious canned foods.  I don't keep a lot of fresh food, in part because I have a very old refrigerator.  I know I can eat a can of lasagne and take that with my pills.  I imagine a can of chili would work as well. 

The cats are good, Torbie slept with me last night and during my nap today.  Then she went and slept with Ron after I got up.  Biscuit and Baby Girl are running around having fun.  I just cleaned the litter box so that's done. 

They really like that Fancy Feast Chicken Primavera.  They eat it down to crumbs.  Before, with the fishy foods, they would only eat 1/4 to 1/3 of it, and leave the rest.  This stuff, they love.  So I bought another case, the last time I went to Walmart.  It is more expensive than the other canned food but they're worth it. 

I do find it funny that they love eating the vegetables in the cat food. 

A mighty splat

Some of you may mock, but I believe in spiritual warfare.  It has been my experience that my attack (Bible Handout) is often met with a counterattack.  One time I broke my toe, the day after.  Today, I fell on the floor and bruised myself.  I even broke my flip flop. 

I slept pretty well and woke up before my alarm, but I had Torbie in the bed, and Biscuit came along, so I stayed with them until the alarm went off.  I fed Biscuit his Chicken Primavera (he loves the stuff, so does Baby Girl), brushed my teeth, etc. 

I took my shower, thanking God for all the working systems involved in that.  I ate my protein bar and took my pills, and I did my God Time. 

A little ways in, Torbie showed up and wanted my lap.  She climbed aboard and sat there, purring, while I did my God Time, prayer, devotionals, Bible study, etc.  We had a very good time.  I kept thinking about the Bible verse "Where two or more are gathered, there I will also be".  That's Jesus talking.  So we hung out and had a good spiritual feeding. 

I went to Walmart with Ron.  Ron is, to put it mildly, rather anal about times at Walmart.  He only wants half an hour to forty-five minutes, no longer.  Paratransit was going to leave us there for an hour and a half, so he decided to take a cab home. 

I was OK with that, as long as I got my 45 minutes.  We arrived on time and I began shopping.  I got more candy for the bags I hand out, protein bars, some sparkling water.  I didn't get anything with aspartame or sugar.  I bought kale and plastic wrap to cover the bowl when I cook it.  I like to nuke it in the microwave.  Kale is pretty awful, but full of nutrition, so I try to make myself eat it. 

I got another case of Primavera for the cats (1/4 of my bill!) and a 3-way lightbulb.  I have a couple of lamps in here. 

I looked to see if they had capris, they didn't.  Well, not in my size.  What, do I need to go to Target or what?  Ron's going to love that!  I do have a good quality pair in my size, one pair, but I guess I can only wear one at a time, huh? 

All done, I checked out.  She was nice and didn't complain about loading my reusable bags. 

I bought a couple of breakfast sandwiches.  I was full after eating one so I offered the other one to Ron.  He said he didn't want to eat it, until he was drunk. 

That's right, Ron's now starving himself before he drinks, so he gets a better buzz.  Ay mi.  He was quite proud of this, said he doesn't get really drunk if he eats first, so he would save it and eat it after he was drunk. 

I wanted to take it back, after that, but I didn't want a reheated egg sandwich, later.  Mike the cab driver (there are 2, this is the one with the SUV) came pretty quick and we got everything loaded.  I really only had 2 bags (the third bag just had more reusable bags, and the kale).  We went home. 

I put my stuff away and threw out some trash.  I saw a spot of transmission fluid in the driveway.  It must have been Mike.  It was pretty big and Mike didn't idle that long.  I told Ron to call Mike and tell him he has a tranny fluid leak.  Ron didn't want to do it. 

I hope he figures it out on his own.  I didn't want to call because I didn't want to appear to be complaining about the stain - I could care less about it - and more concerned with the well being of Mike and his "truck".  I can't come up with a good way to say that. 

I took a nap.  I heard Ron drinking for a while, and then heating up the sandwich.  At least he ate it.  I heard him going to bed. 

Ron spends most of his time at home, in bed. 

And it's TORBIE!  Lying by my feet!  Nope, she's gone. 

I had a pretty good nap but I woke up with a nasty headache.  I took some Excedrin.  It was a good thing I did, and already had painkillers on hand. 

Today I had decided I would evangelize the trash guys.  I had some Gatorades for them, and then I bagged up candy with Scripture booklets.  Normally I would never talk about this, but for the accident. 

I was on the computer when I heard the truck.  I jumped up, but my right leg had gone to sleep.  I still tried to get to the door and fell flat on my butt/knee/ankle.  I trashed my flip flops.  I staggered to my feet and ran for my stuff, took my shoes off, and ran out the door.  I caught them and gave them their goodies. 

They were appreciative.  That was nice, they didn't have to be but they are often overlooked when it comes time to appreciate/spoil.  I like getting people like that. 

I limped back in the house.  Ron said "That sounded awful, what was that?"  I told him I fell.  He said it sounded like it hurt, I told him it did. 

I told him I had still evangelized the guys so I was happy.  I am still hurting but I chalk it up to spiritual warfare. 

You should have seen me crawling to my feet, it was pretty pitiful.  Happily I didn't break anything, I think I strained my right ankle a little. 

Torbie's back! 

So, I am sure I will ache for a few days.  Hopefully I didn't get my right kneecap, I use that to push the snack machine closed when I am working.  Biscuit almost killed me with a wet cat toy one time, he dunked it in his bowl and then dragged it on the floor.  I didn't see the water and slipped, one leg in each direction.  My right knee was black and blue for a while, and painful for longer than that.  No, my knee doesn't hurt, seems to be left buttcheek and right ankle today. 

Ron wants to take tomorrow off, too.  I wouldn't but it's his business, his call.  It is supposed to rain or I'd take the bus.  He is pretty drunk right now so not really in a frame of mind to discuss trips.  I will ask, though. 

Torbie's still lying by my foot. She's a sweet baby.  I'm glad I have her. 

That's it for today. 

All Spanish Handout

Here's the Bible Handout update: 
Yesterday I got 233 Bibles on my porch.  That was some work getting them in the house!  I've got them stacked up by the bear (long story) in my little "foyer". 

Today was my All-Spanish handout.  I had seen a lot of need for Spanish, and thought they deserved their own handout.  I had the sign, I certainly had the Bibles, so I went. 

I took a cab, as usual.  The driver was very nice.  He got a bag of candy with a scripture booklet, and a very good tip.  He was not a Spanish speaker or I'd have given him a Bible, too. 

I did have about half a dozen English New Testaments, and I ended up needing them.  I got set up. 

I walked up to one guy, he seemed kind of tough, tattoos everywhere, scowling a little.  I asked him if he spoke Spanish.  He said he didn't have any money (for me).  I told him that was great, I didn't want any.  He sat up a little at that.  I showed him the Bible and told him I'd like to give it to him, and pray for him every day.  He took it. 

Then the police came.  Someone called in on me.  He rolled up, saw me working.  I had my "Ask me for Free Bibles" hat on, clean, obviously not a tweaker trying to get drugs.  He asked me if I was accepting money.  I told him no, sir.  I understood I couldn't do that.  He basically told me to carry on and left. 

There are 3 laws.  Don't take money.  Don't touch the cars.  Don't block traffic (sometimes I am guilty of the 3rd).  As long as I obey the "three commandments" I am free to do whatever I want on the median. 

I had a lot of singles and doubles.  Some people wanted a Bible for themselves but they had a passenger, so I gave them 2.  Some people couldn't believe I was handing out Spanish Bibles.  When I showed them I was (it has a big title in Spanish) they accepted them eagerly. 

I had one guy, seemed even scarier than my first recipient.  In addition to a lot of tattoos, he had piercings.  He was scowling.  I offered him a Bible and he underwent a total change, softened up, thanked me, held it in both hands.  He was thrilled when I told him I'd pray for him daily (I try to tell all the recipients). 

I had one recipient I got on another handout thank me for doing this one.  He said some nice things about me but I'm just doing my job. 

I had a couple wanted Bibles and when I passed them by, walking, she was (passenger) reading it. 

I had a Mom and some kids in a minivan.  She looked pretty angry so I didn't think she'd be interested, but she waved me over and took 3. 

I had a long line of clear English speakers, but I felt a leading to walk down it anyway.  About halfway down a guy ran across the street and jumped up on the curb right next to me.  He was pretty tough-looking, tattoos, scowling.  I asked him if he spoke Spanish.  He started, then saw my sign, and me offering him a Bible.  He took it and ran the rest of the way across the street.  If I hadn't listened to the leading I would have missed a great opportunity. 

I heard someone yelling for me in the middle lane, and I went out to investigate.  She was waving a dollar out the window.  I told her I didn't take donations.  "Then what are you doing?"  I explained, and told her I had English, too.  She wanted 3. 

I had a very dark-skinned lady with long hair stop and wave me over.  I told her I had English, she said she needed Spanish.  3, in fact.  I was happy to get her set up and told her she'd be prayed for. 

I worked for 2 hours.  I handed out about 45 Bibles.  I had two partial cases, one whole Bibles, one New Testaments.  I only have a couple of New Testaments left. 

After I left I gave a Scripture booklet with candy to the lady at Walgreens (cold sodas), the guy at Dairy Queen (I got a shake), and the bus driver who brought me home. 

Please pray for the recipients!

After the Handout, I went to the Walgreens to get a cold soda, and then went to the Dairy Queen for "my" shake.  I had a different bus driver going home, I finished earlier than usual.  I walked home through the subdivision. 

It seemed like every dog in the neighborhood was barking at me.  They were all confined, though.  As I passed #2, I got a glimpse through their fence.  Their little dog was clean and well groomed, running around in the yard.  That made me happy.  One time the dog got out, came up to me.  It was covered in mats and seemed very pitiful.  Now it's well groomed and a much better looking dog.  Good. 

That's one reason I am so diligent about brushing Baby Girl: an animal, covered in mats, is a very sad thing.  Not to mention it can hurt the animal and make it uncomfortable.  I learned that much watching "Animal Cops". 

I talked to Ron a little, he joked about bailing me out of jail (because of the officer, earlier, during the handout).  I asked him how much he would pay to get me out of jail.  We were kidding around about that. 

I do have one small problem.  They didn't fill one box of New Testaments properly, and one of the Bibles got folded over in half, with the weight of the whole box on top of it.  It is, to my opinion, pretty unusable.  I don't want to throw it away but I can't donate it, either.  I suppose I will create a shelf for misfit Bibles and put it there.  After the rapture, people will be desperate for Bibles.  Someone will be happy to take it, then. 

I took a nap.  I woke up with a headache and a backache.  I was surprised about the back, because my load wasn't very heavy today.  I had two partial cases, maybe 10 pounds in one and 12 in the other.  I also woke up with a nasty canker sore on my tongue.  It hurts.  I took some b-vitamins for that. 

Ron, on his own, made a trip for me to go to Walmart tomorrow.  That was very nice, especially since it's supposed to rain.  I made sure to thank him. 

I was not up to a trip to Walmart after the Bible Handout.  It's not hard work but it's draining.  I am happy to do it, don't get me wrong, but it requires a lot of focus. 

I'm still tired, and I just got up an hour ago, took excedrin, and took a b-vitamin (supposed to be good for energy).  I did take my pills when I got home, I had some chips and had already consumed my shake, that worked OK (I didn't get sick). 

Happily I did up my pills yesterday so I don't need to worry about doing them for 2 weeks, but I do need to get my blood test done.  Doc wants the results before he sees me on the 10th. 

That's it for now.  I'm praying for you daily. 

3 days in one, sorry about that

Saturday, our usual supply run.  Pretty uneventful except Jack's arm was bothering him.  It didn't stop him from working, though.  I hope he gets better soon.  I came home, took a nap, we went out to dinner. 

Ron got Indian food, I got Mexican.  When I tested my blood sugar 2 hours after eating, it was 100, which is fantastic.  So I can keep eating quesadillas and shrimp tacos.  The texture was a little off on the shrimp, I was worried about getting sick, but I didn't. 

Sunday we went to church.  For most, not a big deal.  For us, a very big production.  We took paratransit to a BBQ restaurant near the church.  Then we called a cab to take us to the church (paratransit does not do directly to the church).  It took a while but we got someone.  We had an interesting discussion, the driver was pretty angry at God, very angry at the Catholic church, and said he didn't need salvation, he could stand before God on his own.  Words to make any evangelical cringe. 

We finally got to church, had a good time.  They had a potluck, after.  We ate.  It was fun.  Then, trying to get a cab back to the BBQ place, we waited almost 45 minutes.  The church guys were just standing around with us going "Why don't you take a Uber?"  Well, I don't want my bank account hooked to my phone in any way.  I don't even have my email on my phone. 

The same guy came back for us.  One of the church guys gave him a Bible, which he took.  It was odd to see someone else distributing Bibles for a change. 

We got back to the BBQ place.  I had a piece of pie and some diet soda.  We waited almost another hour on our ride home.  And then we got stuck in traffic. 

Houston traffic often closes the freeways on the weekend, to do road work.  They did that with our freeway but none of us knew until we got stuck in traffic.  Stuck in traffic for 2 hours.  Ron was pretty well behaved about it, and I tried not to talk too much. 

We left the house at 9, and got home at 5.  Poor Baby Girl fell all over Ron when he got home, putting her front paws and head in his lap.  He picked her up and put her in his lap, and she let him.  She is very bonded to Ron. 

I was beat, I went to bed. 

This morning the alarm went off at 4, but I was tired and reset it.  I got up and got ready for work (did my God Time later, before I got online).  We went to work. 

The big boss had said we needed to write up, and sign, an agreement about the coffee vending machine.  We did that and I mailed it.  Then I told the other guy he could have all our coffee stuff.  He said yes to the cups, no to the rest, so I later threw out what he didn't want. 

I decided, since we had a decent amount of time at work, to help Ron with his work first and then do mine.  That worked pretty well, except he kept bugging me during "my" time.  I got everything filled, it looked great, got the sandwich delivery, stocked that, everything's looking good. 

Then I cleaned up the stockroom, some.  I threw out some stuff on Saturday, making a lot more room, and then today I threw out more.  One more "round" and I should be done.  I am throwing the stuff into communal dumpsters so I need to be respectful and not hog the whole thing.  Anyway, things looked good in the stockroom and in the machines.  I was/am happy.  We left. 

We came home with a really nice driver who asked about the cats, by name.  I thought that was very sweet.  While at a red light, I showed her a photo of Biscuit on my cell phone. 

We got home, I took a nap.  I woke up with a nasty headache and had to take some Excedrin.  I hope that doesn't affect my sleep tonight. 

I turned on the dryer, the clothes were wet from the other night when I washed them, and sat down to do my God Time.  About halfway through the prayer portion I heard a thump on the porch.  I know that thump.  That's a case of Bibles landing on my concrete.  Then the doorbell rang. 

I wasn't dressed so I threw on a bathrobe and ran outside with a Bible Promise book.  I thanked the driver, apologized for the load, and he was very nice about it.  Then I gave him the book, which he took.  Yay. 

Then I looked at the porch.  That's a lot of Bibles! 

I had to bring them in the house but I knew the cats would run out if I did.  So I locked up the cats, one with Ron, two in the bedroom (well, I thought I shut the door, but I didn't.  No one got out, though).  Ron was very ugly about that.  I brought everything in and stacked it up by the front door.  The dryer went off, still damp, and I set it to run again. 

Now I need to do my prep work for tomorrow's Bible Handout, all Spanish.  At church they kept asking me if I speak Spanish and I said "Not really".  I only know how to order takeout and curse someone out.  I didn't tell the church people, that.  The church people kept acting like no Spanish would be a barrier to a handout and I told them I've done it before.  It went fine before, it will go fine again.  God is the director of all this, I'm just an actor.  I just need to look up how to say "Please pray instead" when someone wants to give me money. 

I'm playing my favorite playlist and having a pretty good time.  Ron is angry and bitter today, but I remind myself he probably has biochemical issues at play there.  I remember, before my diagnosis, nothing made me happy and I was angry/depressed all the time.  Horrible way to live. 

Oh, and that reminds me, I need to do up my pills for the next couple weeks.  And, pretty soon, I need to get my blood test for my lithium level.  I don't want Doc yelling at me when I go in for my visit. 

That's it for now, sorry I didn't post for a couple days but I was beat after the kind of days I've been having. 

Got my Bibles

I'm tired

It's been a long weekend.  Nothing bad just long. 

I will post a detailed report Monday. 

"You're famous, in Chicago!"

Last night I almost lost my temper online.  One of my FB "friends" - unfortunately the ones who came from LCF seem to run very liberal - posted a long "political rant".  The gist of it is, she wants her kids included at school.  She doesn't want her kids bullied, but she doesn't want her kids to have to be "nice" to those dangerous weird kids who are just as liable to kill her kid, as look at them. 

I pointed out that was a bit hypocritical and left it at that.  I also pointed out the "dangerous" weird kids are a very small minority of the kids at school, nothing to worry about.  But I doubt she listened.  If this continues, I will have to block her. 

I went to bed early.  I didn't sleep very well, even though I had Torbie, and reset my alarm when it went off at 1:30 AM.  I got up around 2:45 (pickup was 4).  I took my shower, did my God Time later (before I got online), and packed a protein bar and my medication. 

Our ride was on time and picked up someone else before we went to work.  We have had this driver a lot in the early morning. 

We got to work and I began stocking.  I have another snack machine now that they fixed the "down" one, so more work - sort of.  People aren't really using it yet so I didn't have to stock it.  I did have to rearrange the pork rinds, they needed an adjustment, but other than that it was fine. 

I did chips first, then cookies.  Then crackers and candy bars.  After that, pastries.  Somewhere in there I got hungry looking at all my "food" and ate my protein bar.  I took my pills.  I drank a can of diet soda. 

Some good news at work: the other vendor is taking care of the coffee machine now.  They get all the trouble, and the "money" as it were (a few hundred a month), we get freedom and no stress.  Seems like a good deal to all of us. 

So I could just focus on snacks and food, my department.  Then I helped Ron with his work, getting drinks for the bottled vendor.  We also got our delivery. 

I thought it was cute, when Ron called in the order he asked for our delivery man by name.   Dr Pepper operations now takes the phone call in Chicago.  I'll remind you I'm in Houston.  When Ron asked for the guy by name, the clerk said "Wow, he must be really good, everyone asks for him by name!"  I told him that today "You're famous in Chicago!" 

The repairman, when he came out on Wednesday, gave one of the other vendor's employees a really good compliment, so I made sure to tell the guy himself, and his bosses, about it.  I believe in letting people know that people are saying good things about them. 

I helped Ron do his work and we finished up a couple of minutes before the pickup time.  I did a quick inventory and texted it to Ron, then we left. 

We had to ride with him to go home.  This driver, for whatever reason, has gone utterly insane with the air freshener.  It is overpowering.  It is like riding inside a Glade Plug-in.  It gets in my hair, and on my clothes.  I reek of cheap air freshener for hours afterward.  Ron's allergies go nuts and he has a lot of trouble. 

As you can imagine, Ron was quite vociferous on the way home, calling in one complaint after another.  The driver was adamant he was doing nothing wrong, but he "let" me put a window down for Ron.  Some people take a little bit of power and go crazy.  And I'm stuck between two very strong willed personalities.  I did not play peacemaker.  I just encouraged Ron to be calm and let him know we were almost home. 

When we got home, I got Ron in the house.  I smelled my hair.  Yup.  It reeked.  It still does.  He must use some kind of spray all over the seats.  He says he does it because some clients have a bad body odor.  No one smells that bad.  Hopefully a supervisor will talk to him about it and he will moderate his usage of this stuff, whatever it is. 

I took a nap, I hadn't slept well last night.  I slept OK for a couple of hours but woke up with a pretty nasty headache; possibly from the air freshener.  I didn't eat any trigger foods. 

So I took an Excedrin.  We went out to a fish place near the house.  We had a good ride to get there and a nice waitress. 

I had the fried plate.  Basically everything in the net, rolled in cornmeal batter and fried.  Plus a stuffed crab.  It came with cole slaw and fries but I didn't eat them.  I did have key lime pie for dessert.  Ron had a shrimp appetizer and then a basket with shrimp and fries. 

We had a good meal, talked, kept it positive.  He only had one beer, even when the waitress offered him another one. 

He called a cab to go home because he didn't like our pickup time.  The driver was nice about putting up the wheelchair.  Some of them stand there and watch me do it, this guy took it away and did it himself. 

We got home, got our wheelchair, went in the house.  I did my God Time.  Then I talked to Ron some more, about Torbie.  She was laying next to him purring so loud I could hear her from the door way.  He was petting her. 

I checked my blood sugar, it had been 2 hours since I ate.  140 - good.  I cleaned the litter boxes and washed my hands.  Torbie was still with Ron. 

I fed the cats (dry food) and got online. 

Tomorrow will be somewhat busy.  We go to the warehouse, buy supplies, go to work, put it away.  We shouldn't need to stock because we did a "big" stock today.  We go home, take a nap. 

Sunday should be interesting.  Ron agreed to go to church on Sunday so we will try to make that work.  It is tricky because the transit service doesn't go all the way to the church.  So that will be an adventure. 

It will be nice to talk about the Bible Handouts with people who are interested in evangelism.  I don't have many people like that in my day to day life; they are all mainly recipients.  Nothing wrong with that but it will be nice to talk to some other evangelism minded people. 

God wants me working on a team.  I have a good team, don't get me wrong.  I have prayer warriors, donors, and recipients.  It would be nice though to talk to someone who actually cares about reaching the unreached, though. 

I still have some issues with the pastor saying "You don't need mental illness drugs" but I have to assume, if I laid all mine out for him and explained just how evil I get without them, he would understand.  Nothing I take is addictive, all of it has serious side effects.  Besides, I don't need anyone's permission to medicate.  I know it is God's will for me to take my medication. 

They are also having a potluck, which should be fun.  They do these periodically, I think it comes from the New Testament, the early church ate a lot together.  As long as I stay away from chocolate and peanuts I should be fine. 

I plan to go to bed early tonight.  Last night I had a nightmare about my sister, that she was back in my life.  I'm still not in touch with her due to several issues, I felt she was abusive to her daughter the night before her wedding; she was engaged in some fraud; she was a terrible employee; she divorced her husband because he was autistic; and I felt she was trying to break up my marriage so I would move there and be her caregiver.  I also feel her church is a cult. 

One of the worst experiences of my life was when she called me one day to tell me they had done a big handout of the cult Bibles, at a state fair.  I was horrified.  She said I gave her the idea and that's the last thing I wanted her to do.  I didn't say anything. 

I could handle Ron, or her, but not both. 

So, hopefully, no nightmares tonight.  Busy day tomorrow and Sunday. 

I just hope Ron sticks with the going to church thing. 

I hate my nightmares

Today we went to Walmart.  Ron agreed he didn't mind going to Walmart if we didn't go after work, and didn't go too long.   So we made the trip. 

Our pickup was late so we lost some time there.  Then we had to pick up a woman at a condo complex nearby.  There are a couple of clients that live over there.  It is "OK", not that great, has a huge no trespassing sign, and is not surrounded by a metal fence like most apartments in Houston. 

Anyway, she took her sweet time coming out.  Her man came out, he weighed about 500 pounds.  I don't know how he got up the stairs but he did.  He was carrying a plate full of pastries and other carbs.  I had to notice a correlation between the food and the weight. 

Then she came out in her electric wheelchair.  She had sores on her leg, weighed well over 500 pounds.  The van literally tipped to the side as the lift got her off the ground.  She parked and immediately demanded the snack plate, and began eating.  I couldn't bear to watch and looked the other way. 

They wanted to know where we were going.  When I told them, she complained that, the last time they had been dropping/picking up at a Walmart, she had demanded he buy her a hamburger and he had refused.  She kept complaining about that.  He said it was a "bad" Walmart, and he didn't want to get robbed.  He told us where it was and I agreed, it was a "bad" Walmart.  It has a reputation as "The Ghetto Walmart" with the drivers. 

We finally got to Walmart.  Last night, I had a series of nightmares.  The worst involved Tokyo getting nuked, I don't know by who.  I was in a panic when I woke up.  I was glad I was already going to Walmart because I wanted to get some canned food. 

I didn't sleep well the rest of the night.  I hope my dream means nothing.  I really do.  I don't think I have the power to make things happen but occasionally God will allow people to get a glimpse beforehand. 

I remember one guy on Rapture Ready.  Early September, 2001, he had a dream, and stats talking about how we need to pray for suicide bombers because we know they are going to hell.  He said he had a real burden to do this.  Then 9/11.  We were all like, whoa.  He has had some more dreams since then but hasn't shared them. 

I don't want that. 

Anyway, we got to Walmart.  I parked Ron.  I had a half an hour.  I bought some bottled water, cat litter, canned cat food (the Primavera one), canned people food (that dream fresh in my mind), etc. 

I rushed to finish and found out they had redone the ride so it wouldn't come for an hour.  Great.  I bought the driver a hamburger and made my deposit.  Then the ride showed up. 

He was a nice guy and remembered us fondly.  We had a little quibble over who would lift the heavy stuff, I wanted to do it, he wanted to do it.  I put the heavy stuff in and he took it out.  He even helped put the cat litter into the garage - above and beyond.  Why didn't we call in a compliment on him? 

We got home.  I put the cold stuff away and stored the bottled water.  I took a nap. 

I forgot to turn off my phone so some spam calls woke me up, but I slept OK.  I think I had Torbie, too.  I love to sleep with a cat. 

Ron was decent to me today and said some nice things.  I have to go to bed now because I have to wake up at 1:30 tomorrow morning for our ride. 

It's going to be an interesting day tomorrow. 

Internet down today

I will post and review comments when I can.  :-(

Not a very positive post

I am so furious at Ron I had to ask God to lead me on what to do.  Yell at him?  Shut up and take it?  Those are pretty much my 2 choices.  I want to do God's will, but I have boundaries, too. 

I couldn't sleep last night.  Apparently the Excedrin I took in the morning affected me adversely.  Just couldn't drop off.  When I did, I had strange dreams and didn't sleep well. 

I got up and got ready for work.  We got picked up on time and things looked to be progressing well.  Then we went to pick up the other blind guy.  He lives a couple miles from us.  We arrived at, I'll call it 6:50.  The driver performed the trip and it came up that he had a pickup time of 7:35.  Like any driver, she called to see if that was a mistake.  She had us (Ron and I) and a slow guy in the front seat.  The driver honked,the guy came and looked out the window.  He was dressed. 

Because he could, the other guy made us wait almost an hour because "I don't like to come out before my pickup time".  Paratransit and dispatch allowed this to happen.  Ron was furious and it set the tone for the day. 

Nothing I did was right, even when I was breaking my back helping him move cases of drinks and helping him stock "his" machine.  He was rude, cruel, and verbally abusive.  He complained constantly.  He got very upset because I made a mistake, I gave the key to the coffee machine to the other vendor before I checked the validator.  We might have made perhaps $8.  But Ron was furious and kept going on about how he pays the bills etc. all I do is waste money.  I told him fine, I'll give you some of mine.  "No, your money is really mine".  I let him know that was not correct and he backed off, but usual verbal/financial abuse stuff. 

We came home.  We had a good ride home but a bit of a wait.  I was OK waiting.  Ron was pretty quiet.  And I managed to take a nap when I got home. 

I got up before Ron did and did my God Time.  If I don't "sneak" like that, I am subject to religious abuse, vitriolic attacks on my faith and against me personally for believing.  You don't like some of the comments?  They are nothing compared to Ron when he gets going.  So I managed to have a peaceable worship time. 

Even Torbie joined in, that was very nice.  She got in my lap and purred while I petted her, did my devotionals, Bible Study, and prayer time (collectively known as "God Time").  I had to use the lint brush when she left, though. 

I love to wear black clothes, and I don't have a black cat.  No, I have a white cat, and two brown tabbies.  Cat hair shows up on everything, especially black.  And I love it.  I like finding a cat hair on my shirt and thinking about the cat who left it there. 

Ron woke up, vicious mood.  Like a cornered rat.  He calmed down, though, and we left.  Good, I thought, we can have a nice little date night and celebrate my last Bible Handout.  It went OK at first. 

We went to the Indian food place.  He got some chicken and pan bread (naan) to go.  Then we went to the taqueria.  You may remember the taqueria is where Ron was - can't dress this up in pretty clothes - sexually harassing the waitress.  She made it into a big joke but I noticed she avoided him today.  I don't blame her.  I would have told the boss and had him banned from the restaurant. 

I ordered my food and ate it.  It was good.  Ron had a beer and became progressively more ugly.  I finally called my aunt to shut him up, figuring, he would behave if he knew I was talking to her.  It was a pretty safe assumption most days.  He doesn't want to "show his color" in front of my family.  He wants to impress them, even though they know all about the verbal abuse. 

Today he kept interrupting me and trying to make me "confess" every mistake I have ever made to her.  He got pretty ugly about it.  I was losing my temper, but kept it bottled. 

The ride came and the waitress pointed it out.  I took Ron out and he verbally abused me on the way to the vehicle.  Some comments "My next woman is going to be able to drive" stuff like that.  Huh.  I thought you believed marriage was for life, Ron. 

Is that after you drive me off, you mean?  I didn't say it but I was this close to unloading on him about crapping all over me, constantly, being so negative, always attacking God, and being ugly to the drivers.  He seemed to pick up on it though, and was nice to the driver on the way home. 

I asked God to show me what to do.  I want nothing more than to go shout at him for a good 10 minutes, but that will just feed his whole "You're unstable, you haven't taken your pills, have you; I'm going to call your doctor!" diatribe. 

He is on the phone now and listening to harp music, so trying to calm himself down, I guess.  I wish I had a treadmill.  I could really use a run right around now (too many loose dogs, I don't have shoes, perverts, etc. are some of the reasons I don't run in public anymore).   Or some weights, if my back wasn't killing me from work and yesterday's Bible Handout. 

Anyway, I'll calm down.  I will work with God on how to establish some boundaries with him.  Years ago, I had to blow up at Ron and tell him I would leave him if he kept up the verbal abuse.  He was totally shocked, but did reform for a while.   Or I could try the calm approach at some point when he is relaxed and see how that goes - I'm leaning that way. 

I am just tired of being used, and used up, and crapped on, not appreciated, etc.  I don't expect him to thank me for every little thing I do but I am tired of him shouting at me all the time. 

I'm the only one who's helping him.  

You think he'd remember that. 

Heather, I'm getting sick of the Handouts!

Yesterday I had a migraine. I was sick down to my *toenails*. I woke up today with a moderate headache but the migraine was gone, and the Excedrin worked on what I did have.

I got my stuff together and checked my last case of Bibles. I had an unfortunate accident with the case a while back and I was worried some of the Bibles might be damaged. They were all perfect. I reloaded them in the case and headed out the door.

I had a rather dour cab driver but he took a Bible and I got set up on the median. I gave one Bible to a nice man with gold teeth, one to a woman going the "wrong" way, and tried to give one to a man who told me I'd already gotten him last week.

Spanish. I am doing an all Spanish, because I gave away nearly half my Bibles in Spanish today. The scripture booklets were a big hit and one guy got so into his booklet, he missed the light! They were honking at him to move.

I had a lot of singles and couples. One lady asked for a Spanish Bible. I gave her two. She tried to give one back and I indicated the elderly lady in the backseat. She handed it back. I didn't get any kids this time, or people asking for Bibles, for kids, but I had a lot of singles and doubles.

Two people asked me what I was handing out, they weren't interested (or already had) in Bibles, but they wanted to know what I was doing! I told them and they harrumphed a little bit, but didn't say anything. I was doing NKJV today.

I saw some police but no one wanted a Bible today. It took me about 2 hours to distribute 28+16. I had one left when I finished. I went to the drugstore and bought a cold soda. The cashier looked a little curious at my getup and the gear (I was dragging the cart behind me, with the empty box and tote bag), so I told her what I do. She liked it, so I gave her my last Bible. She was very impressed and started reading it right there at work!

I had two good Samaritans offer to buy me drinks. I thought that was very sweet but I had a drink. I thanked them profusely. If they come back, and it's hotter, I'll probably take them up on it!

Thank you for your prayers. I covet them, especially for the recipients. I can't do what I do without prayer backup; I know that.

Thanks for reading!

Now, for more detail: when I got to my venue I couldn't get the cart unfolded.  The wheels fold flat if I squish it down, but I couldn't unsquish it.  I became mildly panicked.  How can I get the Bibles out to the median if I don't have a cart?  I prayed about it, remembering my devotional from the other day how God wants to help us out, and it worked.  

The Handout was pretty standard but easily half the people passing me up were Spanish.  Sometimes I could get them to take a Bible just by showing them I had Spanish.  In fact, I can't recall anyone who said no.  So I can definitely do an all-Spanish.  I just need to gather up what I do have and take that out.  I can order more in the meantime. 

I called Ron and he wanted something from Dairy Queen.  I went there and had a burger and a vanilla shake.  I bought him a #6 (Chicken fried steak patty on a bun) and took it home to him.  He enjoyed it, but said it was "too much, like something a day laborer would eat".  He collapsed into bed after eating it.  

I forgot my candy, so of course I felt like a total shit when my driver (the same one I had last week) told me how much he had enjoyed his candy.  Oops.  I'll do better next time.  I need to remember to get it ALL together before I call the cab.  

I wanted to take a nap when I got home but the Excedrin I took this morning had me too wired.  I could not sleep, and I tried for an hour.  I even had Torbie! in the bed.  

Off I go to balance my checkbook and order some Bibles. 

Edit: ordered my Bibles.  Got a lot of Spanish since that's what they want.  100 Spanish NT, 
100 NKJV Whole Bibles 
28 KJV Whole Bibles 
5 Large Print (I have been getting requests) Gospel of Johns 

Have no idea where I'm going to put them all!

Church source (my supplier) sent me a coupon for 10% off PLUS free shipping over $25 (which I crushed).  So God saved the sponsors about a hundred dollars or so.  Enough to get that last 50 Spanish NT.  

One of my worst Mondays in a while

I started getting the headache last night at about 4 PM.  It got worse. I took some Tylenol, didn't really help, now I can't take anything for hours. 

I went to bed.  The pain got worse.  I took some magnesium citrate, I haven't taken it in about a week so I know I needed some magnesium.  It did help some for a while, then the headache came roaring back. 

I didn't sleep well.  I woke up around 4 AM, the time for my alarm, and began vomiting.  I didn't know Ron was awake, but he heard me.  It wasn't just once, either.  I was down to vomiting bile.  I felt and sounded pathetic. 

Ron decided, on his own, to cancel work, which involved a lot of fast talk with the other vendor.  I threw up again. 

When I get sick, I get sick in a 3 gallon bucket.  It is very effective.  I don't like to kneel down over a toilet when I'm getting sick, assuming I even make it to the toilet. 

Anyway, pretty sad scene, Ron rolls in big hero.  I curl up in a ball for hours.  I haven't puked in a while so I drank some Powerade, it stayed down.  Yay Powerade.  I drank that off when I woke up, I'd have a few sips and go back to sleep. 

I got up around 4.  The headache was fading, so only a one day migraine.  I got "lucky" this time. 

I went in Ron's room to ask about a trip for tomorrow and he was utterly drunk.  I asked for one thing, a trip to the taqueria, 2 to 2:45, tomorrow.  When I checked with him just now he said he didn't understand what I wanted.  He was very, very, drunk.  Overall, though, he was pretty quiet. 

Once my head felt better I ate some quinoa.  I wanted something sweet after that so I ate some watermelon (I had bought it already cut up).  The watermelon was not optimal but good enough.  Then I cleaned the litter boxes.  I had needed to do that for a little bit and had planned to do it last night - until the migraine.  The cats were understanding and used it anyway. 

Ron is still totally drunk, swimming in a soft sea of ethanol.  [sigh]  I guess it's too much to ask him to stay sober when I'm sick.  He saw it as a day off and took advantage. 

He kept offering to take me out to dinner, but I'm having a hard enough time with the quinoa.  I'm not nauseous, but it isn't digesting quickly. 

Ugh.  I think I'll go back to bed. 

Ron gave me the day off.

My retching was so pitiful Ron called the other vendor to get our delivery.  We can go in tomorrow. 

I threw up again and went back to bed. 

Ron's pretty deaf, I didn't know he could hear me but he made sympathetic noises every time I was vomiting, which I appreciated. 

He got me the day off which is what really matters.  I don't think anyone wanted me yarking in my bucket at work.  Not good for business. 

We can work tomorrow.  Let's just pray the thing is gone by then.  If it's a 24 hour migraine I still have about 5 hours on it. 

Migraine

Migraine today.  Vomited up my phenergan.  Have to work, have deliveries coming. 

A lot about my towels

I slept in until almost 8.  I slept pretty well, too.  No cats, though.  Ron told me later that Torbie had slept with him last night. 

I got up and took my shower.  Ron got up about the time I planned to do my God Time.  We talked for a while first, it started out OK but then he went into his usual tirades about God, etc.  I told him I was done talking, I was going to do my God Time.  "Oh, Him" and he went on some more.  You'd swear I was cheating on Ron, with God.  He finally left me alone and went back to bed.  I did my God Time. 

Actually, before I started my God Time, I gathered up all the dirty towels (I missed one) and carefully arranged them in the washer, so it wouldn't come unbalanced during the wash cycle.  Nothing worse than an out of balance washer on the spin cycle. 

I added a bleach tablet and set if for soak, then did my God Time.  I learned God wants me to "bother" him with all my issues, because He wants to help.  That was nice to hear, so I asked God to make the washer work properly during this load. 

I finished my God Time and started bagging up candy.  I am currently "doing" Peanut M&M's, fruity snacks, fruit roll ups, now and later, salt water taffy, caramels, Starburst, and two kinds of gum.  To that, I add some hard candy.  I also have a Scripture booklet in there. 

Generally the candy is received with great excitement and joy.  But I had one driver recently who took the candy, then told me "You want my teeth to hurt".  What?  "I have bad teeth, and they hurt when I eat sugar.  You must want them to hurt."  I assured her I didn't, because how could I know?  With what they pay the drivers they can afford to get their teeth fixed, anyway.  I didn't say the last. 

But, generally, people are very excited.  Any kind of evangelism, even handing out candy with Scripture booklets, is bound to face a little opposition.  Rarely, I get a healthy eater who treats me like a leper/drug dealer and refuses it, adamantly.  I respect that and always "take it back".  I do wish I had an extra scripture booklet to give them, though. 

I need to carry some. 

The soak cycle finished for the towels.  I ran another load with detergent, this time (detergent kills bleach, something Ron learned in his food safety class).  That took another hour.  I worked on the candy until I ran out of something, I forget what.  But I called it "done".  I had pretty much bagged up a good couple dozen bags. 

The wash cycle finished.  I ran an extra rinse/spin with a half cup of vinegar to get all the suds out of the towels. . When I had my old washer, I used to open the lid and gape at all the suds agitating out of my towels, when I did that. 

Then I put the towels in the dryer and ran it.  I ate a hamburger, took my pills.  I took a nap. 

I woke up with a headache.  I had nightmares about a pterodactyl and a horror movie.  I was happy to get up. 

I watched an episode of my 600 pound life.  He was over 800 pounds, and at one point became verbally abusive to his fiance.  It's like it summoned Ron.  He came out, wanting to drink.  Quote "I don't know if I had 3 or 4 drinks" (he had sworn to only drink 2 because he gets ugly if he has more) "So I'm going to just go to bed."  First, though, it was the usual tirade about God being "slow" and "torturing" him.  And the guy on the screen is playing head games with his woman and I couldn't help but feel for her. 

He (Ron) finally left me alone, and went back to bed.  He is asleep, I spoke quietly to him and he's just laying there.  I had meant to change his pillowcase. 

Torbie found the skink.  Biscuit brought it home a few days ago.  I saw it in the bathroom but couldn't get it.  Torbie had it out in the hall, batting at it.  It looked "tired".  I tried to coax it into a disposable plastic cup, it wouldn't go.  I patiently explained (as Torbie sat by, watching me work with it) that if it went in the cup, I would put it outside.  Otherwise, I explained, Torbie would eat it.  It went in the cup.  My hands were messing up so I wouldn't have been able to pick it up anyway. 

He (?) got a quick ride to Ron's room, and I opened the window.  I put it out on the recycle can, and shut the window.  Then I threw the cup away.  Another rescue. 

I rescue pretty much everything the cats bring me, except roaches.  Those get killed. 

It's pretty late, time to go to bed.  Goodnight, I'm praying for you. 

 

"Yours, mine, and cats"

I had trouble falling asleep last night.  When I did, it was late, and I didn't get enough sleep. 

I still got up and did some of my God Time (I will finish once I'm done with this post) and got ready for work.  We went to the warehouse. 

The driver had to park far away from the entrance because an SUV was blocking it, letting out a woman dressed in pajama pants.  This is Sam's Club, lady, not Walmart.  The whole "walking around in pajama pants" is just a really bad look, but at least it is modest.   Some of the things I saw at Walmart burned my eyeballs.  One important thing: if you are obese, wear clothes that fit.  We don't want to see your cellulite bulging through your skin tight leggings, bursting at the seams.  I am always careful to wear slightly baggy jeans as a result. 

I went in and got our supplies.  I got extra snack machine supplies because I have a snack machine to fill. 

We could barely fit it on the carts, and then I had a hell of a time collating my carts and getting everything compacted so it would fit in my stockroom.  I stocked what I could, and did a test vend.  I checked all the machines, they looked good. 

Bad, actually.  I would have rather seen better sales, and less inventory. 

We finished up and came home.  I was pretty beat so I took a nap.  I woke up before the alarm clock went off and enjoyed lying in bed with Torbie (who is now on my foot as I type).  The alarm went off and I got up. 

We were going to Walmart.  Ron complained about going, quite bitterly, but this trip was for Biscuit, getting our boy some chicken flavored cat food since he likes people chicken - chicken for people - so much.  Ron was still pretty ugly and very negative. 

He lectured the driver all the way to the store, sharing things like he hopes God puts all the unsaved in a "slow class" so "we can get out of here".  "Everything is made of atoms".  "Money isn't worth the paper it's printed on" etc.  It was just toxic. 

I felt so bad for the driver.  I hear this on a regular basis and am pretty good at tuning it out, but this guy's just trying to make a living.  I saw a kiddie cart but told Ron I would leave him up front.  He liked the idea. 

I didn't want Mr Negative rolling around with me! 

I got things on my list, Ron wanted shakes and disinfecting hand wipes, cat treats, etc.  I also bought him a nice turquoise pocket-t.  He will like the pocket, I will like the color.  I bought myself a package of black t-shirts.  I feel pretty comfortable in them and, as a "Winter" (link), I look good in black.  It is amusing that orange, the color I wear for Bible Handouts, is considered the least flattering color for my type! 

I wanted test strips for my glucose meter.  I found a box of 20, but I wanted 50, if possible.  I asked the pharmacy tech if they had a "bigger" one.  He came back with a 100 count test strip for my meter.  Being a practical woman, I asked "How much?"  $35.  Pretty cheap considering.  I took them.  Well, I paid for them and then I took them! 

Now onto cat food.  Fancy Feast had 3 flavors of chicken cat food: Florentine, Primavera, and chicken in gravy.  I got a few cans of the Primavera, one of the Florentine, and a half case of "in gravy".  When I got home, I opened up the Primavera and Biscuit and Baby Girl went crazy for it, eating almost the entire can.  Good.  I want them to have something they really savor. 

I think I will donate all my "fishy" foods to the shelter.  They are in fine condition, but they are not exactly "wanted" by Biscuit and company.  The alleycats will love it. 

I finished my shopping, I bought a couple of pints of ice cream on my way out.  I was feeling vulnerable to the siren call.  That's one thing they always say on "My 600 pound life" "Food is my best friend, it's always been there for me, it's my consolation" etc.  I am guilty of that to some extent. 

We had to wait a while on our ride home and Ron began complaining again.  He said he would pay for me to take a cab, next time, but he was tired and his back hurt.  He had been sitting up in the wheelchair for a couple of hours, but prior to that he had been sitting up in the wheelchair for about 5 hours.  If I take Ron to Walmart again, I need to take him on a day we don't work, so we can just go to Walmart and home.  "Stopping by after work" is too hard for him and wears him out.  Then he wears me out! 

We got home.  I dragged everything into the house and sorted out "Yours, mine, and cats".   I gave the cats their primavera and they loved it.  I put the ice cream away, and the cold drinks in the fridge.  I threw away some old leftovers. 

Ron collapsed into bed.  He didn't even go for the vodka. 

I called my parents.  My Dad and I were talking about picky eaters.  My cats, and he was talking about me as a toddler when he was doing the single parent thing.  He fed me flank steak a lot, he didn't know you had to slow cook it so it was always pretty tough.  Being a toddler, I didn't have a good set of teeth and balked at eating it, but Dad said if he let me get hungry enough, I would! 

Probably get him for child abuse now if he did that, but he was just doing his best.  He fed me a lot of scrambled eggs, cereal, milk, normal kid food. 

Dad is doing well, he is about 1/3 into his radiation treatments and doing well. 

They didn't really ask about Ron's drinking and I didn't really offer.  No news is the same news. 

Ron asked me to check the mail.  I ran into a neighbor who has a sinus infection from all the pollen - the allergies make the sinuses swell, they get blocked, infection sets in.  Happily I am not allergic to Houston pollens.  Mold and cats, yes.  Garlic.  Crab, mildly.  But not pollen. 

Speaking of allergies, I need to go get my blood test.  I am reluctant because they had such a hard time, last time.  But I'm sure the old tech has moved on and they have a new one.  Up until last year, I never had a problem.  So maybe I just had a bad tech last time. 

(Torbie is still lying on my foot)

It looks like they aren't having a party at #6 tonight, maybe they went to a venue somewhere.  I can get some sleep tonight, looks like. 

Ron didn't want to go anywhere.  I wanted to ask him to take me to church tomorrow but I knew he would just get ugly. 

I can always watch it on the computer. 

I like to see myself as the person who fixes the machine

Halfway through my morning, I thought "It's going to be a long blog tonight". 

I overslept, in part because I had a fat, purring, Biscuit sleeping on my chest.  I laid under him well past my alarm and had to skip my shower. 

Whenever I skip washing my hair, I always end up meeting the important people.  And it happened today. 

So.  I got to work with Ron and the bottled vendor "arm" was frozen in an odd position.  Great, broken.  Good thing the repairman was coming out anyway.  Ron was very upset and kept hitting it.  Not smart, I told him. 

I stocked what I could for snacks.  Ron's boss showed up to conduct a review on the other vendor (we get these, periodically, it's part of our contract) and then the repairman contacted us.  He had arrived.  I got him and brought him back to work.  He showed me how to reset the arm so we won't have to call him for the next "repair".  He fixed something else that was wrong with the vendor, and then he moved onto the snack machine. .

I had a bouquet of fake flowers stuffed into a coil, to make it pretty.  He took one look at it and said "There's your problem, they are blocking the electronic eye".  He tested it without the flowers and it worked perfectly.  All the mean things I said about that poor machine!  I felt a little bad I "broke" it.  I like to see myself as the person who fixes the machine. 

Then he went to help the other vendor for a while. 

The boss came back and said, if we want, he can try to get our coffee machine subcontracted to the other guy.  That would be ideal!  I was thrilled.  Ron was thrilled.  I think the other vendor said yes because he was talking to Ron about changing the lock. 

Awesome!  That machine has been one headache after another.  They can have the money.  We would rather have the peace of mind that comes with "No coffee machine!" 

That was an answer to prayer.  The boss left. 

Our repairman came back and fixed the coffee machine.  So it's working for now until it gets switched over.  Good. 

After all that, we were done.  We went home and I tried to take a nap.  I couldn't sleep.  But Torbie lay down with me so it wasn't a waste.  She doesn't lie against me, but nearby. 

I got up and got ready to go out to dinner.  Ron wanted Indian food.  We went there and had the restaurant to ourselves (they only opened several months ago, and it was a slow period).  I had the Tikka Masala and an insane amount of pan bread (two portions), and Ron had Tikka Boti with garlic pan bread. 

And I'm going to check my blood sugar, it's been 2 hours since I ate.  138.  Just in the OK range.  But I ate a lot of bread.  It's not in the bad zone, that's what's important, but from now on I should probably only eat one bread. 

I made my list for Walmart tomorrow.  I explained to Ron it was very important for me to go to Walmart and buy Biscuit some chicken flavor cat food, because he liked the people chicken so much.  Ron understood and made a trip to go there, and arranged with a cab to take us home. 

I will be getting more glucose test strips (I think it is important to track my sugars and stay out of the diabetic ranges), the cat food, make my deposit for my health insurance, etc.  I will be busy at Walmart! 

First, we have to go to the warehouse and get our supplies, then go to work and stock, put them away.  I will have to check the coffee machine.  Then we go home, hopefully take a nap, and then go to Walmart later. 

I say "hopefully" take a nap because my calendar says #6 has a party on March 18.  Well, they always round it to the nearest Saturday.  So that means they will/might have it tomorrow night.  They had one a few weeks ago, it was just the older boy and a few friends, and the Dad.  The mother took all the small kids off somewhere.  It was actually fairly quiet and not so bad. 

The normal parties have about 20 children under the age of 10 running around, shrieking, and kicking balls into the fence.  They talk very loudly, scream, and generally make a horrendous racket.  Sometimes the father also turns on the music pretty loud (probably to drown out the kids) so I have that, too.  And they go late. 

When I was a kid a party went from noon to 3 PM.  These days, at least with #6, they go from 7 PM to 11 or even 12.  For holiday parties, they go until 3 AM. 

I normally go to bed around 7 or 8 so you can imagine how I feel.  Or maybe you're a parent/grandparent and love screaming kids, and think I'm some sort of aberrant monster.  It doesn't matter: they might have a party. 

Sometimes they don't have a party on the date and I don't see the car in the driveway, maybe they go somewhere else.  I can hope they'll do that. 

We'll see.  I plan to have fun at Walmart after work.  It will be a lot of fun to give Biscuit his chicken nums and see if he likes them as much as I hope he will.  He's such a good boy, and so loving.  I want to spoil him as much as I can. 

(He's lying by my foot as I type)

That's it for now.  I'll be praying for you. 

Around the Handout, again

Around the Handout: I had a pretty normal morning.  Did the Handout.  Came home on the bus.  This time, I set up the sign so it wouldn't rub up against anyone.  But it didn't matter because the bus was virtually empty. 

I rolled the cart down the main road of our subdivision and encountered a couple of small, cute, escaped dogs.  Probably not fixed, spring fever, got a heat and looking for man.  Or a bitch.  I mean that in the "female dog" sense.  They didn't bother me, I didn't bother them.  The fluffy white dog kept looking at me endearingly, but I told (her?) I was a cat lady, sorry.  Besides, she was clearly someone's pet.  I wouldn't have anywhere to put her, anyway.  My back fence is not tight and I sure couldn't bring a dog in the house. 

I got home and put away the cart, bag, and vest.  I have a mesh safety vest I wear when I'm working so I don't get run over.  I almost did, again, today.  A guy decided he wanted a Bible right as the light changed.  I had to run in front of an SUV.  The SUV was very nice about it.  I would have honked and done some hand gestures. 

Other people can be a lot nicer than me, sometimes.  Ron was drinking and playing music.  I told him I was home. 

We had about an hour before we went to Cracker Barrel.  I had a gift card from my (step) sister from Christmas.  We had the same driver both ways.  He was an interesting guy but boy we had a lot of him.  I was happy to get home. 

While at the restaurant, I gave Ron a hard time about eating a biscuit.  "Him!  You're eating Biscuit!"  Ron started choking on his food and had to take a drink. 

I just can't eat Biscuits anymore since I adopted him.  I also ate better than I had planned, I turned on "My 600 pound life" looking at the naked lady with all the fat really killed my desire to get a dessert for dinner.  I had the grilled chicken tenderloins.  They were pretty good but I am not a huge fan of chicken overall. 

We got home, it was 4 PM.  I tried to take a nap but it wasn't happening.  I will just have to catch up tonight.  I plan to go to bed early. 

Tomorrow will be busy, back to work, and then some errands.  I also want to get back to Walmart at some point and get some Fancy Feast chicken cat food.  Biscuit was so excited by the canned people - that sounds wrong - canned chicken for humans - that I would like to get him some chicken cat food.  I hope he would really enjoy it. 

Biscuit tends to get bored very easily with his food.  He'll eat it, but not much.  Bring in something new he loves and he devours it!  It really illustrates the difference.  He is a very big boy so I don't need to worry about him losing weight but I want to take care of him, make sure he's really enjoying his meals. 

He got in my lap today, all by himself, he stayed there for several minutes while I talked to him.  Torbie got jealous and tried to get in my lap, too, sat on his head even.  He didn't budge so she left.  Then he left a couple of minutes later and I never saw Torbie again. 

Torbie slept with me last night, and slept in my bed for the entire Bible Handout, as far as I can tell.  She was in my bed when I left, and when I came back. 

Baby Girl's been around but she's more Ron's cat, I don't see a lot of her unless she wants something.  Ron's asleep "I ate a big meal so it's pointless to drink" after our meal. 

That's it for today.  Have a good one, I am praying for you. 

Another Bible Handout

I did a Bible Handout today. Yesterday, though, I almost killed myself getting the case of Bibles off the bookcase. It was about 5 feet off the floor. I couldn't get it to move and gave it a mighty yank. It came flying off (all 30 pounds), nearly hit me in the head, I lost my grip on it, and it fell on a milk crate on the floor. The Bibles were fine, I was fine, so was the milk crate. 

The case behaved better today. I got it loaded on the cart. I didn't bungee it to the cart because that causes problems trying to load everything . I picked up the case, then the cart, then the bag. Much easier. 

I had a nice driver who was just thrilled to hear what I'm doing. I gave her a Bible, some candy, and a really good tip. She gave me a big hug. 

I got set up on the corner. It was pretty slow but I had some unusual transactions: one guy with cerebral palsy was very excited about getting a Bible, his caregiver got it for him and handed it right over. Then I had the nice man with the gold teeth. 

Of course I had plenty of Spanish. I really need to do an all-Spanish Handout. That could be pretty impressive. As it is, I handed out 8 Spanish New Testaments and a handful of Scripture booklets (www.wmpress.org). 

I had a lot of pedestrians, it was a nice day. One young black man came by, eyed me, and went to the bus stop. After a while watching me work, he yelled "Can I get a Bible?" Absolutely, I told him. He said he just wanted one and ran across the street to get it. I asked the lady at the bus stop if she wanted a Bible and she said "Spanish". I gave him one for her. It was my last. He ran back across the street and the bus came a few minutes later. 

I saw a ton of kids riding with their parents, and almost all of them looked VERY interested, but the parents generally said no. One black lady told me "You're the only positivity I've seen on the corner!" and got a Bible each for herself and her daughter. One Spanish-accented guy wanted an English Bible each for him "and my kid, is that OK?" Of course. My last transaction of the day: I had 4 Bibles left. A minivan drove past, kids gaping at me. I didn't think much of it until they started yelling. 3 kids, and a mother, all wanted Bibles. You bet, and I'm out! 

I went to the drugstore and bought a nice cold soda to celebrate. 

I had a lot of people who told me they had Bibles already. I asked them to pray for "Everyone who gets a Bible". They all affirmed they would do that. I must have had over a dozen people agree to be my prayer warriors, and one man said he would pray every day! I was thrilled. I can't do this without prayer backup. 

As usual, people were shocked when I refused "donations". I told them I had friends who help me buy the Bibles. You do! I strive very hard to be a good steward, every penny donated for Bibles goes to just that. At worst, it goes to shipping for the Bibles. All the cab rides, sign, my junk, snacks, that's all my money at work. I have to answer to God and I want to get a "Well done". 

Thank you for reading yet another post and thank you for your prayers!

Another day, another headache (and a trip to Walmart)

I went to bed early last night, and woke up in the middle of the night with a headache so bad I took my 8-hour Tylenol.  I was able to go back to sleep but it only knocked it down a little.  Pretty nasty. 

I did some research into warning headaches.  Ones you should go to the ER, sudden, severe headache, etc.  Loss of vision or paralysis.  Trouble speaking.  I don't have any of those.  They build while I'm sleeping and I wake up to them. 

I have pretty much eliminated caffeine and aspartame so that's not it.  I have other triggers, I just have to find them.  An allergen blood test said I had mild allergies to crab (which I love), garlic (also loved it), and "bean soup mix" (I can live without that).  I realized that a lot of headaches I had back then tracked to eating garlic previously.  So I pretty much eliminated the garlic. 

But I figure I have other triggers.  I took my shower and did my God Time, got Ron dressed (he can pretty much take care of himself if I remind him of things).  We went to Walmart. 

We had the driver find us a kiddie cart, then I took him in.  We went to the bill pay center and paid the electric bill.  Ron entered the wrong routing number years ago (possibly when drunk, he won't admit it though) and the electric company refuses to take any electronic payments anymore.  So it's either write a check or go to the bill pay center.  We go to the center. 

I pushed him around as I did our shopping, we bought some food.  I got kale and quinoa, not together but 2 bags of precooked quinoa and a bag of raw kale.  There was a couple manhandling the loose broccoli, complaining about it, I had to ask them to move so I could get the kale.  Then they stared at me, riveted, as I selected a bag of kale.  They made me glad I got all my vegetables in prepackaged plastic bags. 

I got Ron his Tums.  The good news on him eating antacids, he is getting some calcium.  I just wish I could get him to take some magnesium. 

I wanted mayo because it goes bad pretty fast.  I only consume mayo at home when I am making a tuna salad, and I haven't, lately.  I (correctly) figured my mayo had expired and I would need a fresh one.  I couldn't walk down the aisle, though, two extremely obese women in scooters were parked next to each other, jabbering about Olive Garden Balsamic dressing.  They couldn't accept it was sold out.  No one wanted to get up and look for it, so they just sat in their electric scooters, blocking the aisle.  I had to park Ron and walk between one of them and the shelves, so I could get my mayo.  I almost had to ask them to move, because one of them was pretty much in front of the mayo.  Well, she was in front of the Miracle Whip.  I don't use that stuff, I prefer real mayo.  So I managed to get it with a little difficulty. 

Then we went over the canned meat aisle.  I got tuna and Ron wanted some shelf stable meals.  He likes them because they don't take up room in the fridge.  He can eat them cold or heat them up in the microwave. 

I knew I had plenty of lemon pepper for the tuna salad, so I wasn't worried about that. 

I didn't get any crap food, just grapes.  I figured they would be a good, safe, treat. 

No chips, no ice cream, nothing.  Not even a diet drink mix.  I did buy a Diet Dr Pepper on my way out, though. 

Next, I went to get cat food.  I didn't know something I found out later so I got them Tuna Feast.  Then I got some plates for the cat food (disposable, 6 inch foam).  After we checked out, I got us some hamburgers from McDonald's.  I got Ron a double cheeseburger with bacon, mine was my usual double cheeseburger with only ketchup. 

We ate our burgers while waiting on our ride.  She came and loaded the wheelchair, then I put up my crap.  Some clients, and their "providers" expect the driver to be their personal slave, putting things away, taking it up to the house, etc.  That's not her job, it's mine.  That's why I get to ride for free. 

So we got home and I put everything in the garage, handed Ron the toilet paper, and put the groceries in the house.  I pushed Ron in the house.  He was laughing.  I didn't know why until I took the toilet paper, he had hidden a bottle of vodka under the TP.  He knows I won't help him (and that includes pushing him in the house) if he has alcohol. 

I was a little peeved but I shook it off.  I chased him out of the kitchen until I could put everything away. 

I took my pills, including my antidepressant (that's always good for aggravating a headache!), and then a nap.  I didn't sleep very well because the Excedrin and the antidepressant had me pretty wired up.  I napped a little, though. 

I got up after a couple of hours and decided to organize the tuna by sell by date.  I had some that needs to be used in a year (front) and tuna that is good for years to come (back of the cabinet).  I also found a few small expired things I got rid of.  I took the jar of pintos (those things would be rock hard if I tried to cook them) out, making room for Biscuit!  He climbed in the cabinet.  He had so much fun sniffing around and exploring.  I didn't have the heart to move him.  He stayed long enough I had time to take a good photo. 

I found a can of chicken that was only "good" for another week.  I have an ambiguous attitude toward canned food sell by dates.  On the one hand, I don't think the food decides to go bad after a certain day, on the other hand, I don't want to get botulism.  I generally err on the side of caution. 

I opened up the can of chicken and drank off the broth.  And Biscuit went nuts, jumped on the counter and started gobbling the chicken right out of the can.  And I felt awful, because, if I'd known, I could have bought him a case of chicken cat food.  He sure liked the people chicken, though.  I finally took it away because I was worried he'd get sick. 

I had a can of tuna I had dropped on the floor and dented very badly.  I wouldn't trust it to hold up in storage, so I opened it.  And Torbie went nuts, wanting tuna.  I gave her some and finally had to take it away.  I was worried she'd get sick. 

At least she can eat the tuna flavored cat food we bought today. 

I mixed up the canned meats, added some lemon pepper, and mayo.  It was pretty good, very filling, and low carb.  It shouldn't be a headache trigger either. 

I logged everything I ate, yesterday and today.  I plan to keep logging my foods. 

I plan to go to bed pretty soon and get a good night's sleep.  The headache is pretty much gone, hopefully I can get some sleep. 

Have a good one, I am praying for you. 

Biscuit puts away groceries