Foul weather cats

Some times I struggle with posting stuff that makes me look "bad".  Being a public figure (a very minor one) I feel I should have it all together.

I slept in until 8 or so.  That seems to be my new standard.  It used to be 7 or so.  I fed a very eager Biscuit and Baby Girl.  Torbie waits until they finish and then eats.  I think that's one reason she has lost some weight, they don't leave her much.

Let me hasten to add, Torbie can well afford to lose the weight.  She is still about 14 pounds and should be about 10-11.  I would never let her starve, and she wouldn't let me starve her.  Besides, Ron gives her more than enough treats, his "portion" for one treating incident is about 15 treats.  And he serves them multiple times a day.  All those treats add up.

So, I fed the cats.  I did not take a shower but it was my day off.  I probably won't, I feel tired today.

I am sure the one poster who is always going on about "clean" subjects will be upset, but it's my body and my day.

I took it pretty easy, got on the computer for a while. Ron got up, we talked, and even cuddled for a while.  He was very happy with that, sober, didn't complain about pain or neuropathy.  It is nice to touch him without him screaming.  I kid him sometimes, all someone has to do to torture him is rub his back firmly.  He would be on the floor writhing. 

I took a nap.  I was a little lonely, because none of the cats came to sleep with me.  I don't expect Baby Girl, but Torbie was on the Bible rack in the living room.  How many people do you know with a rack of Bibles in their front room?  :p  Well, you know one. 

Biscuit was sleeping on the computer room loveseat.  He still is.  I think he likes it because it smells like me, that's where I sit to do my God Time.  He is very comfortable. 

I made sad noises (quietly, so as not to disturb Ron) and no one came.  It was discouraging but I slept alone for the first time in a while.  They must be foul weather cats, they only love me when I'm down. 

I woke up with a pretty nasty headache and took some Excedrin.  I suspect my sunflower seeds had something to do with that, I ate a 2 ounce bag before taking my nap. 

I swear, the list of food I can't eat gets longer and longer.  Maybe I should just live on pepper bacon. 

Ron got up, he was moody.  He "ordered" some alcohol from the liquor store.  He had the guy put it on hold for the cab driver.  But they only had 4 instead of 6.  Now, if I were the drinker I would just say "No vodka, let me get some cheap whiskey" but he said only vodka, and just got the 4.  That means he will run out 1/3 sooner. 

Someone banged on the door, it was a kid selling candy.  I bought some peanut butter cups for Ron and got myself some Skittles.  I didn't eat them yet, though. 

Ron got the alcohol and paid the driver.  He always tips generously so the driver is always happy to come back.  Now he had a problem.  The alcohol was in the garage (he opened the door with his remote), and he can't get out there on his own. 

Well, he could probably get out if there was a fire and I was gone, but it would be very ugly and would probably result in harm to Ron.  He asked me to help. 

I kept thinking he would probably hurt himself if he tried to do it on his own, so I took him out there (this is where I look bad), and waited while he got the "one" bottle he promised he would get.  He got 2.  "Why not get all 4?" I asked sarcastically.  He looked as though he was considering it.  He reminded me I would just have to "help" him that much sooner if he only got one so I pushed him back in the house. 

There, I am done "looking bad".  Cue wrathful comments.  But I am an imperfect person trying to do my best.  I don't want him hurting himself, trying to get liquor in the house.  If he could walk or see I never would have done it. 

But I am accountable to God for everything I do and I am sure He understands my motivations.  When I got Ron in the house, I told him he had to call the hotel for the business conference, and make a reservation. 

He wasn't happy about it, but he did it.  It will not be cheap.  2 nights stay about equal a mortgage payment for us, but like he said, if we don't go they will take our business.  We will get some of it back. 

I was happy, that is one more thing off my list.  Still not happy about the price, it better be a NICE hotel, but he did order two beds.  He is not good at sleeping with me.  He moves around too much, makes noise, wakes me up when he gets in and out of the wheelchair, etc.  I need my sleep to be in prime condition, and, at the conference, I will be the public face of the company (as I am at work).  I will need to "play the game" and be social, friendly, professional - which all means getting a good night of sleep in my OWN bed. 

And, for what we are paying, they should give us two beds.  This is not the last complaint you will read about what we will be paying. 

A mortgage payment! 

After he finished, I said "Now you can drink" and left him alone.  There is no way he could have made the reservation, drunk.  It is made so that is one thing off our back. 

He told me not to "bother" him and went off to his bedroom after he spent some time in the kitchen, drinking.  He only drinks in the kitchen because, in the past, when he has had the vodka bottle in the bedroom, he has gotten into it when drunk - not consciously, but in a fog of some sort.  Then he has horrible blackouts, hurts himself, keeps me up all night, etc.  So we can't do that.  The kitchen is the farthest area away from his bed, about 45-50 feet away (small house).  So, he has to get up, get in his wheelchair, ride himself to the kitchen, drink, and go back. 

Sometimes he lingers too long in the kitchen, has additional drinks, and gets into trouble.  The last time he fell out of his wheelchair I found him in the kitchen.  So, it's not a perfect system but he tries to keep the shrapnel to a minimum.  I don't, and won't, "let" him keep a bottle in the bedroom.  I haven't even told him about the bottle he left on the kitchen table.  It is half full, with one of his little portion cups on top.  I am not going to give it to him, that's for certain! 

I am not super hungry tonight so I will just make a big bowl of instant oatmeal and have that for dinner.  That should hold my pills. 

All my meals revolve around compatibility with my pills.  Timing of the meals goes to pill time.  That's just how it works and I am fine with that.  I'm just glad I have pills.  I had 32 years without them and I have NO desire to go back to that. 

I will probably go to bed early tonight.  I don't think Ron wants to go anywhere tomorrow so we will take it easy. 

Sometimes, I would love to take a nice hot bath with a little tea tree or lavender essential oil, but Ron hates both scents, and they fill the house.  So that's out.  He never leaves the house unless he is with me. 

It was surreal, the other day, Ron riding by himself on paratransit while I rode in another car, but it worked out.  Normally, when we leave the house we are ALWAYS together.  The only time we separate is at Walmart, when I leave him off to the side while I push my "buggy" around, collecting merchandise. 

I'm starting to get hungry so I'm going to dish up some oatmeal.