Very early Tuesday

 Headache, plus Ron was yelling in his sleep so I got up early.  Last I heard it is supposed to rain today so he is probably in some pain.  

I wonder if I vocalize in my sleep when I have a migraine?  Happily not that level but enough I didn't want to sleep as headaches can get worse in my sleep.  If I'm up and it starts to get worse I can get it with the headache pills I have on my desk.  

Anyway I was doing some research I want to buy some vegetable seeds, not this instant but have a list ready to go.  I plan to spend about $20 total and then I will have them if things get really bad.  

I was also thinking about Brian and his wife.  Back in 2012 I had problems with the wall of my shower enclosure starting to fall in, I told a friend in Colorado about it and she contacted a branch of her church in my area, explained Ron and I are both disabled, do evangelism, money is very tight, could they help?  They sent Pete out who thought it would be a wonderful project, but he nicked one of the copper pipes doing demo.  He had planned to use a "shark bite" to repair it but the church said maybe they had better send another guy out.  

I was told the other guy was a plumber.  What that really meant he had done some plumbing in the Navy, on a sub. Big difference.  

He came out very late (after 8 PM).  Later on his wife told me he "always" took one of his children on his do-gooder projects "To show them how it's done" but that just REEKS to me of "doing works before men" which Jesus SPECIFICALLY spoke AGAINST.  When the guys opened the wall, though, they found some bugs so they told him - he made a big point of bringing boric acid powder - and probably figured it wasn't good enough for his kid.  So he comes out and uses a shark bite.  Pete was like "I could have done that".  I will say the repair held but apparently he went home and told his wife A LOT about me, Ron, and my home as his wife later told me "Oh, he told me all about your house"  WHAT THE HELL?  Not very cool.  Pete did 90% of the repairs and we became good friends out of that.  I would fix him dinner and I had a big cooler full of various sodas, juice and water for him.  He appreciated it.  And I made sure he was appreciated.  

While Pete was in town he took us to the church and it was OK at first.  They were very excited to have me distribute Bibles they had in a garage.  I eventually gave them all away.  That's when I started hitting walls.  Everyone, including the pastor, said they would give me all the Bibles I needed, but when I asked for more (I had a particular need for Spanish) they told me no.  Fine, I went out and bought them with my money.  

Then the pastor found out I had depression.  He said it wasn't depression but spiritual oppression from demons due to the work I was doing - and to his credit I think that was partly true.  But then he found out I was taking medication.  

The pastor said he had been on "mental illness medication" sometime back, "got hooked, and kicked it".  I am guessing it was sleeping and/or anxiety pills.  Then it escalated to finger pointing at me during the service talking about "sinners and addicts".   He couldn't differentiate.  

Let's take a moment to seriously consider this question.  Do they really want me around their children off my antipsychotic?  I don't think so.  Yet that's exactly what he was preaching.  

So I stopped pushing Ron to go and stopped watching the live stream.  I unfollowed Brian and his wife because she is one of those women, always a drama "Oh I have such anxiety the dog's haircut didn't come out perfect" kind of "problem" that makes people like me very frustrated - and equating her sort of "problems" to mine.  Are you suicidal?  Are your children in wheelchairs?  Is your husband blind?   Are you worried about your next paycheck and how you are going to pay your utility bills?  No?  Then it's not equal.  But I didn't say that I just unfollowed them.  

Every now and then something (I forget what) reminds me though of what a rude gossip he was about my house.  Yes.  It is messy.  Yes.  I had bugs in the wall I didn't know about (I did eliminate them).  Yes, the house was poorly constructed.  But don't use those issues as an excuse to look down on me which is EXACTLY what he did and EXACTLY what Christians are NOT supposed to do.  

I would have rather paid a plumber.