Rhetorical question.
I hang out on a prepper board, they are pretty level headed and I would say seated in reality. The general motto is "don't get caught with your pants down if things get bad". Facebook - today I had a long time friend ranting about FEMA camps coming next summer. I tend to run rather paranoid due to my illness.
Of course I believe some of my calls are monitored, especially the one I was talking about politics and naming politicians. I believe someone is getting reports of my online activity.
The problem I have, at the core, I had a family member in the intelligence community. One I trusted, who said yes THEY are watching everything you do and say, more than once, to me as I was growing up. Referring to me as a "civilian". That fed my natural paranoia.
Let's be blunt here I have at least one schizophrenic family member. I suffer from the disorder in addition to my bipolar but the bipolar is the "dominant" diagnosis and the schizo just a "bonus" "feature". So I have the trait.
My issue is balancing everything.
Of course, #1 I have to look at my faith. God is on His throne. He is in charge.
#2 Yes my family member did tell me about "them" and this person does not have schizo anything. Maybe some depression but considering that's reasonable.
#3 Almost everyone online (except the prepper board, amusingly enough) is trying to tell me to be fearful and "do for yourself while you can". Which doesn't match with #1.
So I end up where I am, I have taken some measures but nothing I deem excessive. I am not living in fear.
But I feel like virtually everyone (but the board) wants to pull me off down Fear Street.
No comments:
Post a Comment