Sunday afternoon

 So I feel better, I just left a scathing, one-star review for that turkey's book.  Depression is a sin.  UGH.  Makes me so mad.  

But then I think of people with epilepsy, they had to deal with stigma too.  They sure "looked" demon-possessed.  

Anyway, got more depressed, decided to walk to the gas station.  I had a panic attack crossing the footbridge over the bayou.  I am fine crossing it at the other side of the subdivision but this way, sometimes, I freeze up.  And the last thing I want during a panic attack is to be frozen on the thing that is causing the angst.  

See, I have 2 big fears: traffic, and heights.  The footbridge manages to combine both into a horrible cocktail of lockstep frozen panic.  I managed to force myself to keep going.  Not fun, though.  

It would be nice to stop and look over the water flowing underneath me, but for some reason that bridge just freaks me out.  I got to the gas station.  I had enough money ($5) for a parfait and a soda, so I got the parfait.  It had vanilla pudding layered with real whipped cream, and nilla wafers.  I couldn't eat it there so I had her put it in a bag.  I had the parfait in one hand, the soda in the other and I was certain that would help me focus and not panic.  And I froze again.  I just told my brain to keep moving me forward.  

I guess the lesson I will have more anxiety when I have depression, they run together.  I remember a mental health tech asking me about anxiety and me telling her, I have that constantly and that is true even now.  

One reason I am so strict with my caffeine.  But I got home OK.  

On the way, passing through the park, I found a broken, dead, tree branch (about the length of a pencil) with a large air plant on top.  It was very pretty.  I like air plants.  I used to have one many years ago.  I saw it again on the way back and decided to take it home.  It would just get thrown away by the yard crew, mowed, or disposed of some other way.  It was not getting back in it's tree.  

So I took it home, found my old clay orchid pot, cleaned up the pot, and then put the air plant in it.  I did some reading and decided to dunk it in some water, did that.  Moved it around a few different windows.  It is in the front window now.  

I think it has pretty good odds.  I don't have to worry about the cats knocking over soil because it is living on a branch, the way God meant it to.  

Let me see if I can get a photo

So it's something to keep me occupied.  

Tomorrow I go to the warehouse and then to work, maybe the bank as well.  I will see.  Again, something to keep me occupied.