The dishes can wait

I had a lovely afternoon.  I spent a lot of time looking out the bedroom window, watching the birds eating, a thunderstorm, and the birds again.  I saw a fledgling sparrow peeping at Mommy, who painstakingly picked up a millet seed in her beak, and placed it in his open mouth, then ate a seed for herself.  She taught him how to eat birdseed, and as I watched the little guy slowly became more proficient at feeding himself. 

It was a beautiful and tender moment.  I would have missed it, if I'd been tuned out, with my headphones or sitting in front of my television.  The little guy kept looking at me with a beady little eye, as if to say "Thanks, Heather". 

Well worth the price of birdseed.  It is so easy to get overwhelmed in things I can't control.  I won't make a list; everyone has them.  Home repairs, possible neighbor issues, you name it.  I could always have hysterics over finances and poor sales.  My illness, Ron's health, my family... it's a lot. 

I can't carry those loads; so I do my best to give them to Jesus.  If I catch myself worrying again, I turn them back over to Him. 

I also enjoyed an excellent book.  I finished "Germ", and it was excellent.  I'm really glad I have another huge book by the same author. 

It's been far too long, since I read a good book, watched a thunderstorm, and enjoyed some sparrow antics (I have to say, sparrows are my favorite - Ron likes the doves).  My illness doesn't always allow me to enjoy life, but when I get a window, I take it.  I hope I take it.  I don't get them that often. 

I'm not going to spout a bunch of cliches, because they always annoyed me, especially when I'm depressed;  "Oh, take time to enjoy life?"  When, in the unrelenting pain, do you suggest I do?  Before or after I whack the suicidal impulses?  AGH. 

So, I won't say that.  But when your illness, or your life, gives you a window of clear thought and smooth emotions, where you have the opportunity to enjoy a few simple pleasures in life, do it. 

The dishes can wait.