Avalanche

Last night and today, I had the song "Avalanche" running through my head.  Manafest, Avalanche

I've had a secret fantasy for a long time; Bibles showing up on the doorstep, ready for distribution.  It's been my little dream, and it's coming true. 

I'm so happy I could cry.  Mom talks a lot about my "faithfulness" - "Heather, you're so faithful".  I aim to be obedient and able, whatever God wants. 

Wow... I have an avalanche of Bibles... someone else is asking me what I'd like to hand out.  How do I feel?  Incredibly blessed, grateful, and very responsible for the recipients.  Some big time thank you prayers. 

I'd like to share what I'm telling God right now.  If you have a God allergy this is where you go away, I guess. 

God,
Thank you so much for all the awesome people and the Bibles they are giving me to distribute.  I don't mind saying, I'm scared by the responsibility, but I'll just go where You send me and hand them out as You direct.  You know I am totally committed to the Big Bible Handouts, and the everyday ones as needed. 

THANK YOU FOR USING ME.  I don't mind having all the pain and wierdness in my life, because it means You can use me.  I don't care what it takes, if it will keep and make me useful, bring it and give me the grace to deal. 

Lord, KEEP ME USEFUL.  I am scared I will get arrogant, prideful, and useless.  Please don't let that happen.  You have been so good about that in the past, reminding me to keep my eyes on You.  Please, please, please keep it up.  I don't care what I have to endure if it means I can share You. 

Thank you for "giving me a heart for the lost" - as Mom says.  I can't stand the thought of them facing life without You; hurting and struggling and suffering, thinking You don't care or don't exist!  We all need you so much Lord, please continue to let me share You with them.   Thank you for protecting me from Haters - I see them out there and they're scary.  I know You have protected me and please continue to do so, unless it means we can reach more people. 

Keep me accountable and a good witness.  I know myself; I am full of pride, judgemental attitudes, and other ugly stuff that makes You look bad.  Help people to see You, in me, when it matters.  Help me to be a good witness for You, and bring glory to Your name.  I don't want to shame You.   Please help me to have Your thoughts in my head, Your words in my mouth, and Your love in my heart. 

Give me the discretion to know when to reach out, and when to stay quiet.  I know some people aren't ready yet; help me to know when they need Your word. 

You are the boss.  This is all Your program, of distribution.  I know that.  I'm just the Bible Donkey.  Please guide me and show me how to do Your will. 

I want you to say "Job well done, Heather", when it's time for me to graduate and I'm standing in front of Your throne.  I know I'm saved by my faith in Jesus.  Only my faith in Him, saves me. 

But I do want to be USEFUL!  Thank you so much for all the awesome people who helped me get Bibles, and all the recipients.  Thank you for letting me see their eagerness to get a Bible.  Thank you for making the handouts FUN.   Thank you for giving me an appetite to do Your work. 

Thank you for an understanding husband and family, and awesome blog readers  and facebook friends who egg me on in the handouts.  Please continue to guide and lead me.  I can't do anything outside of You, and I know that. 

Thanks for picking ME to do Your work!  What a huge honor!  Thank you, thank you, thank you! 

Oh, and extra prayers for the awesome Bible givers, please give them good health, good relationships, and good finances.  Help me to make the Bibles count and do Your work. 

Thanks again! 
Love,
Heather B