I just have to wait

It rained a lot, to my ears, last night. 

When I went to bed the water was about even with the sidewalk.  I was worried it would rise and we would find ourselves in imminent risk of flooding again. 

Imagine my delight when I got up this morning to find a wet, empty, street, with two gutters of water on either side flowing into the storm drain.  Excellent. 

I did have a colony of ants on my porch.  They had camped out in my "fake grass" welcome mat.  Ugh. 

You may remember I hallucinate bugs crawling on me; and I've had a lot of this the last couple days.  The ants want somewhere to go: we are dry.  So they are trying to move in,

However, I'm getting crawled on so much I'm starting to hallucinate it now.  Ugh. 

I woke up with a pretty nasty headache (from using bug spray) in the middle of the night and I took a Naproxen, and ate some applesauce. 

I went back to bed and slept OK, woke up with the headache still but the Diet Mountain Dew (I have a case of them) cured it.  Then I went out front to take a photo of the yard.  It is pretty unremarkable so I'll skip posting it. 

That's when the ants got me. 

I went in the house and did my shower, God Time, etc.  I listened to some music and cried a while. 

I cried yesterday, too. 

Everything is OK from a physical standpoint, but I've been under a horrible strain for the last half week.  It takes a toll. 

I still hate myself when I cry; I see it as a symptom.  It's not.  Sometimes I just need to cry, but sobbing hysterically was such a part of my illness for so long, it is hard not to view it with disgust.  Also, crying during verbal abuse just "fed" Ron and made him worse, so I had to "toughen up". 

At any rate, I cried until my Bounty paper towel fell apart.  I did feel better. 

I posted on my social media.  People are concerned, and from what I see when I turn on the news, I don't blame them. 

The rain has stopped for now but the wind is picking up.  It makes for some strange noises.  I think #2's patio furniture.  They have lots of it; failing to realize Houston only has nice weather about 2 months out of the year.  The rest of the time the patio furniture sits idle.  I just hope it doesn't go flying into the side of my house. 

I tried to take a nap but the racket woke me up.  I heard it a couple nights ago, too. 

Now that the storm is moving around I guess we will get more winds + rain as opposed to just rain. 

I just pray we stay dry. 

Ron and I are focusing on eating all the stuff out of the fridge and freezer, just in case we do lose power.  I should be able to do a mobile post from my cell phone if necessary, and I have some portable cell phone chargers. 

When it comes to things I have done, I have done pretty much everything.  I wish I had a completely waterproof bag for my "bug out" stuff, important papers, credit cards, things like that.  I did find a waterproof tablet case and I put some important papers in that. 

So, I sit here, for the third day in a row, wondering if we are going to flood (the dams have released a lot of water and that could possibly affect me), wondering if Ron will hold up, wondering if Ron's bottle of vodka will hold up, the cats will be OK, our stuff will be OK. 

I have great faith that God will carry me through whatever happens, and I can certainly use this disaster as a great opportunity for Bible Handouts, but for now I just have to wait.