Thursday, January 29, 2015

Second Coat

I'm watching Biscuit use the litterbox.  He can't figure out it's easier to "cover" if one uses litter and not "air digs". 

I feel like yesterday shouldn't have seen so hard, but it was.  We got up, went to Walmart.  I didn't do my God Time and barely got my shower. 

I found the 20 cent seed packets from American Seeds.  I really like them, they have done very well for me in the past.  The packets have a generous amount for someone like me, who doesn't use much.  Best of all, they had just been delivered.  They were taking them out of the packaging. 

You'll recall me saying the ideal seed packet has been protected from heat, light, and moisture.  

I loaded up on some favorites and headed off to other things.  Mainly snackfoods for Ron and some spray bottles for discipline. 

For instance, just now Torbie was very interested in Biscuit's litterbox activities.  I thought "Oh, maybe she'll show him how to cover" (not that I care).  She crept over, raised a paw, and hissed at the poor baby as he sat there crapping.  The last thing I want is Biscuit running off and hiding, maybe to poop under the bed, so I squirted Torbie and yelled NO.  She ran off, Biscuit finished.  The girls don't even use the litter box.  They always go outside. 

One of the squirt bottles has a bad gasket, and drips a little when I squirt, but other than that they all work fine.  The kittens are continuing to work on Ron, who's fallen in love with them, using a special high-pitched "baby" voice I haven't heard in a while. 

We went to work, later in the day.  The late-shift employees loved it.  I paid a couple of refunds, and didn't - for the other vendor.  I felt bad for those people. 

We didn't need to stock much, it's a slow week.  Probably a good thing as the depression's been bad, the last couple days.  In fact, it got bad enough I took my medication at work. 

No one could tell, even Ron thought I was "fine".  I have learned to be a good faker, which is a mixed blessing.  On the one hand, people really don't want to hear about my problems (except you).  On the other hand, people exist who would want to know so they could give me a hug or whatever, but I'm "denying" them that. 

I will continue to "front", at least at work.  I feel it is more professional.  Of course this coming from the woman who shrieked "I'm going to get you" and chased Ron halfway across the cafeteria to whack him on the head with a piece of cardboard.  I also pretended to growl like vicious dog, and chased, a customer who teasingly stole a bag of pork rinds. 

Professional. 

So.  We had a good ride home, but when we arrived I was exhausted. 

I forgot to mention, our ride to work was very odd:  the driver was fine when she first pulled up, but when I came back out with Ron she was absolutely enraged about something, and drove like a demon trying to get out of hell.  She was very aggressive in her driving. 

Ron became so alarmed he actually called customer service and told them he was afraid for his safety.  I think the driver overheard, because she began driving more professionally. 

"I was about to ask them to send a supervisor" Ron said. 

Anyway, I went straight to bed.  I slept pretty well for a change.  The dog barked a lot while the family was up but shut up when they went to bed.  Poor dog.  My alleycat rescues get more attention and I'm "crazy". 

I got to sleep pretty late today (a day off).  We just went to Starbucks.  It is near a pet store, I went and bought more kitten food.  Everyone in the family likes the kitten food. 

They may not like the kittens, but sure like their food. 

I ate a snack and took my meds early, correctly figuring it was better to get a jump on them.  I couldn't find my Haldol, though, the pill pouch had opened up in my pocket.  I had lost a calcium tablet on the floor.  I figured maybe I dropped the Haldol. 

I had horrified visions of crawling toddlers eating my Haldol.  It's pretty toxic.  I finally found it in a wad of pocket lint, still in my possession.  [Sigh]  More drama than I wanted. 

So I'm firing pill pouches.  I'll put them in a small bottle instead. 

By the way, our driver was incredibly sick with a headcold.  That's why I stash a few (nondrowsy) remedies - I gave her some and sent her on the way.  Poor thing.  I hate it when I have to work sick (the contract drivers don't get medical benefits or sick leave). 

People need a lot of nurturing, and people who know me swear it's one of my spiritual gifts.  I'm sure Ron and the cats appreciate that! 

I took a nap.  I figure, days like this, take a nap and when I wake up the pills will have done some good.  I was right. 

I also try to get a lot of rest around cold/flu exposures so my immune system is tip-top. 

I had enough energy to attack my stick - I have to "varnish" it.  I have a spray can of clear, satin finish, polyurethane.  I also have an old t-shirt and jeans. 

By the way, I'm into the slimmer fitting jeans in my size (currently 22W).  Now I have 3 pair.  The old pair I use for yardwork (relaxed fit and very baggy on me now, also pretty frayed).  My "blue" standard wear everyday jeans, and the black jeans which fit beautifully.  I will need to wash off the cat hair, but they worked fine for today. 

I am happy to see practical weight loss.  I want to take care of myself (when I'm not depressed). 

A good example: my sister (an obese hoarder) recently had to have "emergency knee surgery".  I can imagine how that happened.  

Ron and I literally cannot afford that to happen.  Once I get my stick fixed up, I can go walking again. 

I don't want to be a walking target, anymore than I already am.  I divulge too much, including my real name.  I share a lot of details that make me easy to find; although I am exceptionally careful not to talk about my schedule. 

Anyway, time to go check my stick and see if it needs a second coat. 

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