My life is full of wierdness.

This mixed whatever mood persisted today; in an ugly fashion.  I told Ron, if this continues tomorrow, I'm calling doc.  That's why I have a doc, so I can see him and get a tune up now and then. 

Ron has been TREMENDOUSLY helpful and kind.  If nothing else, he is appreciating me and doing his best to be supportive.  I believe he loves me, as much as he can. 

I told Ron today: I felt a little bad that I can't work full time, or drive, but figured if God needed that He would have made me that way.  Ron agreed, and asked me who'd be handing out Bibles on the ghetto bus if I didn't do it! 

I have yet to meet another. 

[sigh]  So, about all I can say is I went into work for a while, came home, ate lunch, and took a nap.  I didn't manage much else today.  [shrug] 

So, it was a low energy day.  Ah, for a mania.  I can do 3x a normal person's work when I'm manic, so it all does average out.  I'm glad I have an understanding boss. 

We got up, our ride was late.   The driver was grilling me on how to "get on" at the Post Office (so she could make the easy money - ha!).  I tried to tell her, it doesn't work that way. 

They are only hiring "Casuals" right now, a temporary worker.  They work less than 6 months at a time, then get laid off and have to reapply.  The Casual makes $9-12 an hour, works nights, and does a lot of heavy physical labor in very noisy and stressful conditions.  TOLD her that; she kept bugging me. 

Feeling masochistic?  USPS Employment

My favorite was the plumber.  I asked him why I always saw guys in the maintenance uniforms pouring bleach down the drain.  [bleach eats metal pipes]  "What's the big deal?" he demanded "Bleach isn't an ACID." 

What.  Do you say.  To that? 

In my case, nothing. 

So I told her.  She was such a horrible driver I am secretly hoping she does quit Metrolift.  

We got to ride around for an hour and a half, picking up developmentally disabled people on the way to their adult day programs.  I wasn't having kindly thoughts; my first cue that even in spite of my meds, I was having a problem. 

I kept repenting and asking God to help me have Good Thoughts.  Then the driver, whom I'd given candy, started grilling me on the contents of my tote bag (warm, bottled, sodas) and demanding I give her "trail mix".  Excuse me?    I didn't even HAVE trail mix!  [laughing]

I'd already given her candy, which I'm not required to do, a pretty big bag at that!  [sigh]  Some people are just going to be demanding, entitled, and get on nerves I didn't know I had. 

I told her no, I didn't have any trail mix as she took yet another surefire "shortcut" that added another 20 minutes to the trip.  I was thinking, no wonder she was so late, and you are going to get yourself fired; driving like this.  The vans have GPS tracking. 

Every turn and your speed is fed right into the computer.  [raised eyebrow]  Oh, well.  My mood was just horrendous, and I'm trying to hold it together long enough to get to work and pour anothe diet soda down my gullet. 

I did, and did.  I did everything, and felt like I was  good productive employee.  One of the guys was out on sick leave for quite a while, but he's back.  I gave him a big hug (after getting permission), and listened to all the gory details of his surgery.  People LOVE to talk about their operations! 

Got out of there, and out to the bus stop.  Our ride came right quick.  Worst part of that ride, I had to sit in the back.  I adore the front passenger seat, unless it's one of those creepy white guy drivers.  I always get in the back if it's them. 

We got home and Ron helped me fix lunch.  It was good.  I was pretty wiped out, and took a nap.  I checked on the plants. 

The corn is developing ears.  It's like the "elbow" between the leaf, and the stalk, is sprouting "hair" - the cornsilk.  I find it really interesting.  I have huge tassels coming up off all the cornstalks now.  I like it, it's cool.   I only have about a dozen stalks total.   I may take some photos tomorrow. 

I've never grown corn before.  I like it.  Certainly plenty of compost material, hopefully a tasty vegetable.  It comprises quite a percantage of Bubba's beloved cat food.  He won't eat the healthy stuff. 

Pretty exhausted and still battling the nasty mixed mood, I got the computer booted and ran my antivirus.  For the curious, I have a reconditioned desktop Ron bought for my birthday/anniversary a few years back.  I like it just fine.  Ron asks me if I want something "better" every now and then but I'm fine.  I do need to backup my media, though. 

Ron wanted some downloads.  My family like to get him gift cards for music (pretty hard to shop for a Ron, you'd think - but a gift card for music or Starbucks, and maybe some salty snacks, and you're his favorite).  We got him a couple of old time ones. 

He was teasing me about "Losing my Religion" - I told him that would probably concern some people if I posted that; but not as much as Blue Oyster Cult's "No fear of the reaper" - she commits suicide at the end - horrible song.  [shudder]

Seriously, I'm not overly worried about this.  Yes, I may need some extra help, a needle in my arm to check my lithium level, and maybe some Depakote; but I am still enjoying things like my garden and able to do most of my daily living stuff.   If I wasn't, or showering was a huge effort, and I was unable to get out of bed - that's bad.  I can work, and enjoy my Days Out. 

This isn't fun, but I'll get it.  God's got my back; and He absolutely needs me like this. 

I tell you one thing, it sure has me leaning on Him!   I can hardly urinate without His help, and when I do, I always thank Him for healthy kidneys!  [laugh]  For real.