Things I don't like

One of the things I hate the most about my illness, even now, beyond the hallucinations and delusions even: Wierd dreams!

I am always faithful about my medication because if I'm not, one of the first things to start bothering me are the weird dreams. I've been taking it right on schedule for weeks if not months now.

For instance: Today I took a nap (in another post I'll get more into how was my day). I fell asleep readily and the first dream I remember wasn't that bad. Someone was showing me a complicated evacuation route in San Diego, of all places (I've only passed through San Diego with a church youth group in my teens).

The route involved climbing stairs and going around and under things. All I really recall are seeing the ocean, and thinking "How are people who use wheelchairs going to use this?"

The next dream was more detailed. In this one, my husband (who was most definitely not Ron) was bringing me home from the hospital. I had suffered some kind of accident with amnesia. It involved a wierd little narrow, empty room with gold-wrapped presents and bottles of shampoo on the floor. Then we went to his place of work, which seemed to involve traumatized children, some of whom were physically sick as well. I was waiting around a lot. I went looking for him and suddenly realized (remembered?) he'd been having an affair with a co-worker. I told him and he was unrepentant. Then his co-worker pulled out some of my hair, and the roots turned to these horrible bugs.

NOT A GOOD DREAM! Yuck. People act so surprised when they see me enduring the side effects, and act like "This is horrible!". No! My ILLNESS is horrible. The side effects are NOTHING compared to this.