Frozen like fish stick

Well, that was a challenging couple of days.  Yesterday I worked about 10 hours straight for Ron, running trips to the warehouse, bringing some very heavy inventory to the business, and helping him stock it and put it away.  I came home, ate, and went to bed, thanking God I could have a nice long sleep. 

Until we had the drama.  Ron woke me up a few hours later, very drunk and behaving badly.  No, he didn't touch me.  Yes, he woke me up, slightly trashed my bedroom, and used some very bad language as applies to me.  I was pretty furious and had a hard time sleeping after that. 

My consolation was my beloved Bubba-cat (the black one), still curled up in my bed and sleeping away.  We had a good cuddle.  Now and then he'd wake me up for petting, I'd pet him for a while, and we'd fall asleep again. 

Yeah, I know.  The cat can wake me up but Ron "can't".  Well, Ron wasn't purring.  Needless to say I did not have a good rest or good dreams. 

When I got up Ron remembered what had happened.  He was very apologetic.  I told him "You say you can manage this - well manage it."  I reminded him he wouldn't stay long if I went off my pills and behaved badly towards him.  I told him "You need to manage the quantity you consume, the speed you're drinking, or both".  He agreed. 

I got up and did my God Time.  Ron moped around, convinced I "hated" him.  I told him no, but I did wonder about demon possession.  He gave me permission to try to get rid of the demon, if there is one, "next time".  We had a talk about "next time" - and my expectation he would either control the drinking, or stop the drinking.  I told him this was something I would leave him over. 

I need stability - at least some - and I need to get a set amount of sleep every night if I want to remain "stable".  He understood. 

I forgave him (Bible is real clear on that).  He went off and read his book for a while.  I read my book for a while - it's very good.  I haven't had enough time to read lately. 

I finished my book ("People of the Flood" by Vaughn Heppner), and decided to have a little day out.   I brought a little money and my bus pass, that was it.  It's not like I could read my Kindle at the bus stop. 

Which one?  The one where I got robbed? 

I went out and missed the northbound bus, so I caught the southbound.  I had a good transfer to the other bus, the driver actually saw me running and waited. 

I got off and went to the Christian bookstore.  I told them about the last handout, and let them know I had been making referrals.  They were nice about it, but it was clear I was the only one really excited.  I felt a little lame after that, and left. 

I headed to 1960.  It's a busy road.  I wanted to cross at an interchange where it meets another busy road.

However, I've been having some anxiety issues and froze like a fish stick.  For many years after Ron's accident, I would have panic attacks when I got near traffic, on foot.  I also have a huge fear of heights, and did I mention I had to cross OVER the interchange?  The two combined in a nasty way and left me frozen and very upset. 

The anxiety may be the one thing that gets me off caffeine.  I was miserable. 

Some Day Out.  I really wanted some of that bread pudding from Fiesta.  It's so good.  However, if I want it I will have to approach it from a totally different angle. 

I went to Starbucks instead, and the Kolache factory.  It was good; not as good as the bread pudding, but not bad either.  I gave some testimony to someone so maybe that's why God let me have the big freeze. 

Ron was almost out of cat treats, so I got some at the pet store.  He loves to treat the cats. 

I decided to come home.  I was pretty tired and the anxiety attack had worn me out, not to mention I never slept that great to begin with. 

I came home, the same 2 buses.  The first ride was great.  The second took a while. 

I watched a guy on the median, begging.  Some groups in Houston have a "God Scam" they use to beg.  They hand out a little flyer talking about their "ministry" and ask for "donations". 

Let me tell you, if you think that money goes to reaching the lost you are wrong, wrong, wrong.  I watch them, it goes right into the pocket.  This guy was wearing a blindingly white and red striped shirt, clearly brand new.  It looked like the one in the detergent ad, that blinds your eyes.  It was spotlessly clean and pressed.  He wore designer warmups, and z-coil shoes. 

The guys who really need the money are filthy, unkempt, bearded, wearing filthy, ragged clothes.  If you want to give some money, give it to them. 

There was another man on the bench with me, older, by about 20 years, than the man begging, and he carried a backpack.  He appeared to be ready to ride the bus.  I told Ron about the begging guy, and said "If he wants to make some money he'd better dress poor!  His shoes cost me half a month's pay!  (they do)"  The guy next to me started muttering under his breath, getting agitated. 

The bus came.  I got on.  The guy did not.  That's when I realized he was affiliated with the begging guy.  I hope what I said gets back to median guy. 

Doesn't anyone make an honest living these days?