Monday, April 6, 2015

Take it for granted

I am always asking God to make me better, to literally put His thoughts in my head, love in my heart, etc.  I don't want to be a bitter hater.  I don't want my illness to rule me.  Even medicated, I battle. 

I was very pleased:  last night they had a party next door.  Again.  Holidays, I get it.  Easter was pretty big at my house, growing up. 

They hung out in the house for a while and then migrated to the backyard.  I heard the kids screaming and sighed a little.  I would not be going to bed early.  About 20 minutes later I looked out the back window.  It was still light out. 

I saw a soccer ball in our yard.  As you know, this has been an ongoing issue.  The last time I told the kids they were not allowed to bang on my door or go in my yard.  I would, I'd told them, check the yard and throw it back. 

I thought for a second.  If I threw the ball back then, they would of course make more noise.  But I don't want to deprive children of their toys, either. 

I went out back, quietly, and gently flipped the ball over the fence - again, quietly.  I'm sure they found it but I didn't make a big production.  They got the ball back, I got my peace and quiet (sort of). 

Happily, they were actually great.  The music wasn't very loud and they didn't drink.  I just heard the kids screaming in the yard - and kids are going to do that. 

It went on for a couple of hours with them in the yard, the party broke up, and they left.  It was wonderful.  I wouldn't mind if they did that every time. 

Of course, they didn't know I had to get up at 2.  I got to bed after 9 PM.  Not only that, as she's done after other parties, the dog decided to YAP! YAP! YAP! all night long, only shutting up after I arose.  

Again, I told myself, well, at least the neighbors will get a couple hours of peace and quiet.  Very proud of myself for really thinking like Jesus would - I want to be this person.

And, like I told my driver, the dog is going to bother them a lot more than she bothers me.  They need their sleep even more than I do.  They have the infant, I don't.  He works about 3 times the hours we do.  I can take a nap, they can't. 

So, if anyone's going to snap, it won't be me. 

It's a cost/benefit thing.  Does the benefit outweigh the cost?  Only they can decide. 

I just went after my Diet Mountain Dew, took my shower, and did my God Time.  I always feel so virtuous when I manage to get it done at 2 AM.  It's not like I get bonus points.  However, He makes me a better person and I develop better spiritual discipline.

Got that.  Got dressed.  Off to work.  It was a very long day.  Lots of stocking, helping Ron, other vendors are back (she was sick), helping customers, two deliveries, stocking said deliveries, two repairmen.

Finally, all done.  I bitterly wished I'd brought my folding chair.  In addition to complete exhaustion, my feet hurt.

However, Ron did his usual "5 things to do at the last minute" routine and our driver actually called us.  She was a great driver, I liked her a lot.  I had a hard time believing she was 50 like her cab license said.

We had to ride around a bit, get a lady from dialysis (when the vehicle was empty, Ron and I both agreed we are never doing dialysis - but watch God have something to say about that).  Poor thing looked mostly dead. 

Finally home.  I had 2 pieces of pizza left from Friday night.  I ate them, gobbled my pills.  "When I'm sleep deprived" I told Ron "It is super important to be properly medicated".  It is very easy to get ugly and depressed. 

So, that done, I went to bed.  I slept about 3 hours and woke up with a headache - I think I was just dehydrated.  I'm fine now. 

We have tomorrow, sort of, off.  We have to run a work errand but we will be getting some Church's chicken later.  I love their biscuits. 

I might get a picture with Biscuit surrounded by biscuits, and a picture of Gravy eating same.  That would be cute. 

Pray God I get a solid NIGHT of sleep tonight.  I can't ever take it for granted! 

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