Thursday, April 9, 2015

My butt hurts

Oh, I am so tired. 

Hours of heavy physical labor, a very long day. 

Ron complaining nonstop the entire time. 

I mentioned it as often as possible, maybe he could be a little more positive?  He went into his "You can't control me" theme. 

I found him more exhausting than the hours of manual labor, stocking, helping customers, and aiding him.  While in the stockroom, alone, I asked God silently why I found Ron so tiring. 

"It's the complaining" I got.  "It's incessant - a river of negativity.  No one is designed for that." 

Our business is doing better than ever, no serious health problems, the cats are fine, the neighbors OK.  My mood is finally not-depressed for a change, let me tell you a cause for joy. 

But, according to Ron:
God could fix me with a thought.
God is torture man.  He even refers to God as "torch" - short for torture man.
God is "too slow" in His return.  "The people who are left aren't worth it, Lord". 

"I don't yell at Casper the friendly ghost" he says, "So my complaints are proof of my faith."

I don't think any amount of medication will ever help me understand that.

However, I thought of one of my devotionals from some time ago.  Go through your life, it said, without a single complaint.  Don't even complain about the weather.

I plan to take this for a run, at least with those I deal with in person.  I will probably continue to use the blog as my vent box.  I can't modify his behavior but I can change my own.  I don't want people to view me the way I see Ron just now. 

Anyway, all said and done, I did it all, and did it well.  I earned every bite of the takeout I just ordered.  

Oh, I'm tired.  Even my butt hurts. 

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