Reasonable Accomodations

Heather, you may ask, what are you talking about?  Well, I could give you the legal definition but I'll give some examples. 

I have a TV show; and I offer closed captioning.  I build a one story home with no steps and wide doorways.  I manage a pharmacy, and educate my employees that the wierd lady with the brain fog is on some very potent antipsychotics.  My restaurant offers braille menus (and I love you so for that!); and, as I build the sidewalk, I put curb cuts so someone in a wheelchair can cross the street. 

In my case, reasonable accomodations run a little unusual.  For instance, my lithium causes a mild hand tremor.  I can't eat "normally" when I'm having a bad day; I have to hold the utensil in a clenched fist as opposed to delicately balanced between my index and middle finger.  If "table manners" and "eating properly" matter greatly, we'd better not have lunch.  Especially if Ron's coming. 

Due to my learning disability, I "have" to watch TV with the captioning on.  I can't process it otherwise.  It's like people jabbering in another language, I only get a few words out of 20.  I imagine some people might find the scrolling letters annoying, but I adore them.  God bless closed captioning.  I even wrote a fan letter to Captionmax. 

I also need a lot more rest than the average person.  When I went out for a family wedding, I didn't make that clear.  I just assumed, since I talked about getting a nap every day and "needing a lot of sleep" it would be understood - those needs would continue.  I can't things on hold for "a special occasion". 

Instead, my family, God love them, just treated me as they would a "normal" person.  "We're too busy for a nap today, we have too many things to do to get a lot of sleep."  I understand that and I never complained, in spite of 6 hour "sleeps" every night and no naps.   When I got home, however, I cycled into a depression and had to sleep 15 hours a day, for a week, to catch up on my rest. 

Next time I know I will need to be a LOT more assertive.  "Just so we're clear, I will need to rest 2 hours every afternoon, and get at least 9 hours of sleep every night.  Can you assure me that'll happen?" 

I'm not normal.  I am disabled.  I need reasonable accomodations and I'm not sorry for it.  I only know life in this brain and it requires a lot of "charging". 

That said, surprisingly to me, my parents are very understanding. 

I think they figured "Ron" would need all the rest and downtime, and he does.  So do I.  So, when we went on the family reunion cruise they expected me to take a nap every day, and go to bed early every night.  When they come out to visit, it's the same thing. 

So, what does Ron need?  I think the most important isn't sleep or even any guidelines on how to deal with "the blind", but, rather, an understanding he has a broken filter.  He will say anything that comes to mind, anything.  A lady at Walmart almost smacked him today.  Her child was misbehaving and screaming at earsplitting volume.  Ron shouted "Gallate" which is a very rude term for "Shut up!"  I was already headed out the door when Ron rethought what he said and said "Heather, maybe you better come back and say 'My husband has a head injury' in Spanish." 

Yes, I know how to say "My husband has a head injury" in Espanol.  "Lo siento, mi esposo tiene la cabeeza lastimada."  Then they go AHHH. 

Yup.  Never a dull moment.  I need to teach him to change the verb tense to "tengo" and he can say it for himself.