They use bleach on the sheets, don't they?

Heidi, my local family is now in Europe.  I will talk to her when she comes back, or I might just get a week at one of the extended stay motels.  They use bleach on the sheets, I think. 

I have a small emergency fund, so if I'm about to lose it I can:

 1.  Call my sister in Florida - she is itching to get me loose of Ron.  She even investigated a local employment agency for people with mental illness.  She would be happy to buy me a one-way ticket and have me live with her until I got on my feet (not long, I bet). 

2,  I could call my Dad.   I wouldn't want to move back to California but he would help me get my own place, I think. 

3.  Aforementioned aunt and uncle. 

4.  I could call the adult services line and tell them what's going down; see what they advise. 

5.  There is at least one person I could call and spend the night (a married couple). 

6.  Rent a week, at the Rent-a-week motel.  They even have them on the good bus line. 

I absolutely agree, his behavior is completely unacceptable.  However, I feel he's going to have a crisis. 

Today's an example.  I don't know if our friend did it deliberately, but it was telling.  Ron needed to go to Fry's. 

He has fallen on top of his CPU one time too many, and broken the USB.  Chuck told him, OK, I will come meet you this afternoon and take you. 

In the meantime, I, just out of the Starbucks, had a lovely time at Favorite Dollar.  I thought of the various service sector jobs, and I think I'd do pretty well.  I asked God for a sign on job-hunting, and got a "not yet". 

So, when the time comes I'll be out there.  I think I would do well at foodservice, sales, cashier, caregiving, and any kind of heavy working with the public job.  I am a very bubbly extrovert, and I love to help people. 

The other day at Walmart, I got a couple all set up for tomato growing in a large pot, and I don't even work there!  So, a garden center can be added to the list. 

Anyway, I did that, and went over to the Christian bookstore.  They were worried about me, and I let them know what is going on.  They were VERY supportive. 

I checked the vending machine and let Ron know.  He seemed OK, it was about 2.  He mentioned he would like to bring some Sundrop and hand out samples.  I thought it was a great idea. 

So, I hung up and went to the import store.  I had fun, they had some lovely rose incense.  I'm a little retro, I like to burn it during my God Time.  It's certainly Old Testament if nothing else. 

Ron called me and said our friend was coming over, did I want a ride.  I said OK.  My bag was pretty heavy. 

A long walk to the bus stop, and I caught it.  Fed my bus card (the new card has to be removed from the holder, for the reader to process it), and got paid up. 

I have to take multiple buses home on my Day Out.  When I got off the bus I called Ron and told him I had moved.  He was in the truck and had me stay on the line. 

As soon as I got in the cab (it was about 3) Ron was just completely nasty to me.  All the way to Fry's. 

Our friend was like, Ron, cut it out.  He was very irritable, and sulking a lot.  I couldn't figure it out. 

He didn't want to go into the store, but yelled again when I called and asked for clarification.  Even our friend could hear him. 

I told him Ron was in a pissy mood.  He couldn't believe I said it and made me repeat it.   When we got out to the truck again, he mentioned how so many caregivers lose their sprarkle.  I agreed.  I think it was too subtle for Ron. 

Chuck and I were thinking hamburger, but Ron made more rude comments about weight gain and said no.  Came home. 

I was pretty queasy (one reason I wanted to eat!), and I had a ketosis headache.  That's good.  I want to burn some fat. 

Ron immediately went to his room and started drinking.  Ah.  He had probably stayed sober until then. 

When I got up, he sat on the front porch drinking.  Oh, that's my FAVORITE.  

I was pretty disturbed, earlier, when Ron said he wanted sleeping pills.  I told him he couldn't do that with alcohol. 

He wouldn't need to drink, he said.  He just wanted to go to work, come home, and turn off until it was time to work again.  I find that disturbing on so many levels.  I told him when he shuts "The world" out, he is also shutting me out, but that didn't seem to matter. 

Right now I think he's like a car speeding and veering all over the road.  You just know it's about to crash. 

Hopefully someone recognizable will emerge from the wreckage.