He's not going to die.

Ron grimly went through the first round of prep, and we went to sleep (they only did his colon today, stomach has been fine).  We woke up at 2:30, and did the second round.  Well, I prepared it for him and went back to sleep. 

Thank you, Ron, for letting me get another hour of sleep. 

I woke up around 4:30, mildly manic due to sleep deprivation, worry, and caffeine abuse (once I got started).  I took my shower, did my God time, helped Ron bathe (the neuropathy makes scrubbing painful, he yelled some as I gently swiped the washcloth over his arm).  I helped him dress, encouraging him to wear the elastic waist shorts and casual sandals. 

We weren't going to work, after all. 

My aunt arrived on time and liked her little (very small) gift. 

I brought 9 Bible Promise Books.  I had hoped to leave them in the surgical ICU waiting room.  

We went to the hospital, got a little lost, found it 15 minutes before our arrival time.  I scowled at a malfunctioning vending machine.  Sloppy, and unprofessional, vendor. 

Ron sat on his walker, I pushed it.  We filled out yet more paperwork and he paid his copay (about $150).  I signed a million consent forms for him and we went back. 

They told me to strip him and put him in a gown.  I made bawdy remarks when they closed the curtain, and the nurse yelled "I'm right here!"  I got him in the gown and into the chair. 

More consent forms.  More questions.  Ron tolerates anesthesia well, I told them.  One time, when he was a child, they gave him ether.  The anesthesiologist shuddered "We don't do that now!" 

It took them two tries to start the IV.  They were going to do the back of Ron's right hand, which suffered pretty major trauma in the accident (massive road rash, so bad I thought he'd need grafts).  He took one look at it and sucked air through his teeth, clicking his tongue in disapproval.  He tried to get the big vein but it didn't cooperate. 

Another nurse came and started the IV on Ron's left arm (they love the left arm).  We hung out for a while, waiting on the doctor. 

Let me tell you, I would so rather wait on the doctor than keep the doctor waiting on me!   Sure enough, Doc showed up and they whisked Ron away. 

Doc had been very clear, this wouldn't take long.  I barely had time to run down to the cafeteria and buy the LAST Snickers bar, and a couple Diet Dr Peppers.  When I got back upstairs I ate my candy, waited a few minutes, and they took us off to the little waiting room. 

I hate the little waiting room.  It always makes me think of death. 

Doc came out.  Ron didn't have a tumor, he had colitis.  "Pretty serious" per doc.  "Diffuse moderate inflammation found throughout entire colon" per report. 

Hey, he's not going to die, colitis is TOTALLY treatable, and we have an explanation.  Ron had an atypical presentation, normally the patient is in extreme pain along with all his other symptoms. 

"When has Ron ever followed the program?" asked my aunt.  Good question. 

I feel so vindicated.  I knew something was wrong, something serious, and more than one medical professional wanted to blow it off as hemorrhoids (which Doc said were minimal).  It sounds odd to say I am so happy to hear the diagnosis. 

I'm glad he won't die, of course.  I am very glad he won't need any surgery.  I am glad he will have to cut back on drinking, that's in all the data on the condition.  I am glad Ron's demonstrating a willingness to learn about the condition. 

I'm glad this is treatable.  I'm glad I wasn't just being hysterical Heather, the way SOME tried to make me feel (I forgive them for that, I'm sure they get people freaking out over hugely minor issues). 

Doc continued.  He had taken samples.  We would get the biopsy results in a few days.  It could be an inflammation process, or an infection.  He'd have to see.  He would formulate a treatment plan based on those results, which we'll get Wednesday. 

"That fast?" Ron asked later. 

I asked about diet.  Ron could eat anything.  What about probiotics?  "Let's wait on those".  Hm.  

Doc and I finished, he went off to probe other colons, I supposed. 

They sent Ron to recovery.  It took him about half an hour to come around.  His nurse came out, exasperated "He wants to dress himself!" I grinned.  Sounded like my Ron, alright. 

She gave us the discharge instructions and I suggested she notify Ron of the no-alcohol rule.  She said she would.  She gave me the report (so that's where Doc went), and left after giving my aunt instructions on the pickup spot. 

A nice male nurse brought Ron out, riding on the seat of his walker.  "Did they tell you what they found?" I asked.

"No" Ron replied, looking surprised.

I told him he had colitis, etc.  "They can even put medicine up your butt!"  The male nurse laughed.

"I don't want that" Ron replied.  The nurse snickered. 

"Well, they have pills" as the nurse nodded.  I told him he had NO tumors, etc.  I'm really surprised I was the one to tell him.

Perhaps they did, earlier, and he forgot.  

I was feeling a very strong leading to leave the rest of my Bible Promise Books with the endoscopy gang, so I did.  The nurse was very touched. 

We got Ron loaded.  He wanted BBQ, but the place wasn't open.  It was barely 10 AM.  I kept forgetting we'd gotten up at 3.

We went to Carl's Jr.  Ron used the toilet and came out "I just farted so much I nearly floated away!"  My aunt and I laughed.  They fill the colon with air to get a good view.

He ate about half a breakfast burrito, before pausing.  "I'd better stop".  Good idea, Ron.  He has been fine.

I ate my burger and asked my aunt if she'd mind running me by Walmart to get my medication.  She was delighted to help.

Everyone wants me medicated.  Me, most of all. 

I went in and thanked the pharmacist and tech.  "My husband had a horrendous colitis attack the last couple weeks, I thought it was cancer... the meds really kept me together.  Thank you!"  I paid ($140 for 4, three month refills, and the extra money for the "new" Wellbutrin pays off in way fewer side effects).  I got that and yet another Diet Dr Pepper.

Ron's accident taught me to appreciate people, to let them know you value their contributions in your life.

They were surprised, but happy to hear it.  I paid and left.

Ron gave me the money back on my medication.

We went home.  My aunt gifted me with five (I think) six packs of Diet Dr Pepper - basically one a day for a month.  Nice!

I eagerly hauled them in the house.  My aunt left.

I went to sleep for about 3 hours.  I don't know if Ron went to sleep right away, but he was asleep (still is), when I got up.

It's good to hear him snoring and know he will be OK.