What a week

 I had two dreams about Ron this week but first a little back story.  

I had 3 grandmothers growing up, the "good one" (Dad's Mom) who adored me and made me "feel" like "the favorite" even though I'm sure she loved us all equally.  I used to visit her every summer for a few years.  Good times, I always loved seeing her.  I wrote to her sometimes.  My aunt still has the letters which grandma saved.  She died from complications after back surgery literally right after Ron's accident (needless to say 2003 was a bad year!).  

Then I had the grandmother we didn't talk about, my biological mother's mom.  She had apparently come out to visit and see me a few months after my birth and that ended with some sort of massive quarrel and Mom banning her from ever seeing me again.  She was "not right" (grandmother) mentally so my mother must have felt she was some sort of threat.  And my grandmother had the borderline "you are either ON or OFF" mentality.  I was "off" after that so she never made contact.  I sent her a letter after Ron's accident but she tore it up in dramatic fashion.  Well, I tried.  My sister had told me she was mourning my mother's death (who had died right around the time Ron got hurt, also, I wasn't kidding about 2003), so I thought I should reach out.  To quote the song, shot down, in a blaze of glory.  

Then I had my adoptive grandmother.  I wasn't really close to her but she was nice enough to me.  She died just this week.  

I had two dreams about her, and Ron, this week.  The last dream was more clear, in it she and Ron were waiting in a vacation cabin and he was walking around.  

One problem I encountered when I visited my family; they want to believe I had A Great Love Story.  I look at it this way, there were 2 sides to my marriage: we had a great love story that overcame the odds; and he treated me badly.  And both sides are true.  They (parents) only want to talk about the first half.  So I didn't bring up the second.  

It doesn't really matter, it's over now.  To quote the song, "In the end, it doesn't really matter".  

It's over.  

I am a little dizzy today.  I think it's a holdover from the migraine, I'm glad I'm off.