When he wakes up

I debated video blog versus standard; it looks like I'm doing both. 

Some good news: I got a nice cuddle from my cat last night, and this morning.  She's a good girl. 

I also found my Lifeway coupon.  I called and asked them to hold "some" Bibles (maniacal laughter) but they said they can only hold for 2 days.  I will have to call in on the 6th and hold the Bibles I plan to buy on the 8th.  Ron is being awesome about it - sure, when do you want to go? 

I do love that man. 

I'm trying to stay busy doing things I love. It's hard when all I want to do is either shout at someone, cry, or both.  God knows poor Ron has been on the end of that plenty. 

Which leads me to this: I know many people didn't understand how I could stay with Ron after his accident, or during the binge drinking blackouts every night, but he stayed with me. 

Someone with my illness (bipolar type one, rapid cycling, psychotic, mixed episodes) is HELL to live with.  Not only did he do that but he hung onto his love for me for over 14 years, until I got diagnosed and medicated, because he saw the real me under the illness. 

I will have to tell him this when he wakes up.  I have a policy, if I have something nice to say I say it then and there. 

Committment.  We has it. 

Of course God gives us everything we need to keep the marriage going, I don't and will never say "Oh, we are so awesome, doing this on our own." because we are NOT.  God gives us the grace we need to deal with all our drama. 

I just wish I could turn the knob down on said drama.