A lot about bleach

Well, he was quiet.  Mostly.  But Ron has spent most of the day on the floor, getting up every several hours to "top up".  Pretty sure this is a new low for him; but he's quiet and hasn't made any messes. 

Y'all on me to leave him.  I don't think it will come to that.  At the rate he is going he will kill himself before I even have a chance to leave him. 

I did some more cleaning.  I think I have a teeny-tiny mania.  Just a smidge, nothing like what I used to have, but underneath it all I have a tiny bit of a revved feeling.  So I put it to work with cleaning, which was mainly getting rid of trash. 

Example: my water bottle.  I make Crystal Light drinks in it, as it is 2 quarts.  I put the large packet, 2 quarts of water, and drink that for a while.  On a good day I drink 4 of them, so 2 gallons. 

But it developed mold.  I tried scrubbing it out but it didn't work very well.  It was still "gross" and probably a hazard to my health.  Last night I finally put some bleach into it and filled it with water.  I let it stand for several hours, then flipped it over so it could clean the top part, too.  Today all I had to do was rinse it out, but it still tastes bleachey.  I guess I used too much bleach.  I rinsed it really well so there's no residual bleach. 

That would be a hell of a thing, to accidentally kill myself.  And no one would believe it was an accident. 

I just took a drink off my water bottle.  Tea, with a subtle undertone of bleach.  OK, next time I won't use so much bleach, but it looked awful.   I wouldn't let Ron drink out of it but I was using it every day. 

I don't take care of myself! 

So, I slept OK except for strange noises from Ron every now and then.  I also heard him rolling up and down the hall to get more vodka.  At the rate he's going, I'm surprised he has any vodka left. 

I woke up around 8, I had Biscuit in my bed.  He was cute and cuddly.  "We" fed him, and I checked my blood sugar, which was OK.  About 109 I think. 

I took a shower and did my God Time.  Torbie joined me during my God Time, curling up against my leg on the couch.  I found it very sweet. 

I took a nap afterward, and called her up into the bed with me.  She laid down on my leg and I stayed, frozen, in a very uncomfortable position, for about an hour.  She finally moved, but not far, just off to the side on a nice fold of blankets.  I had a good nap after that, except for Ron dragging himself off to get more vodka. 

I got up and did some cleaning, and watched a little TV, but I didn't like what was on so I left it on and went into the other room.  Ron made some noise in the back a couple minutes ago but I'm not interacting with him when he's drunk, if I can avoid it. 

I had a bowl of cereal for dinner.  I ate some salt first, because Doc was pretty clear I need to keep my salt intake up.  I could get really sick if I don't.  Amazingly, the lithium, salt, milk, and cereal all get along agreeably in my stomach. 

I'm listening to some music and trying to have a good time.  I can't let Ron suck me down his rabbit hole of depression and alcoholism.  It rained today so I couldn't go out, but I might, tomorrow. 

Ron didn't want to go anywhere tomorrow so he didn't make any trips.  I don't know if he was capable, anyway.  I guess he will spend tomorrow drinking himself onto the floor, as well. 

One time he told me he was lonely and I never spent any time with him.  Well, I can't.  He's always drunk.  I am happy to spend quality sober time with him but he's never sober. 

It will be colder tomorrow so I may stay home, I may go.  I have the bus pass and the bus route running nearby (about half a mile away).  If I go, I will probably miss my nap but it may be worth it. 

Ron will have to take me to Walmart on Saturday to get my medication.  It should be in by now.