"Rest up and recover"

I wasn't too happy when I had to get up at 6 AM today.  I didn't sleep well, I kept waking up congested, or sneezing, just miserable. 

I think, when I'm really sick, I'm too affected to really "suffer" (I've said this before).  "Half" sick, like my cold, is just enough to experience the misery without the relief of the exhaustion I get when I'm truly ill.  So, it's worse for me to have a cold, than a flu. 

It feels worse, at least. It's my blog, I'll whine a little. 

I have no appetite and have to force myself to eat.  Especially when I'm taking my medication. 

So, I got up and took my shower.  I stuck my morning medication in a baggie and stuck the baggie in my pocket.  Let's hope I never get searched!  Lots of pretty pills! 

"Really, officer, I'm crazy!" 

We went to Walmart.  Ron kept saying my Depakote and lithium were $30-some dollars.  I didn't believe him.  The last time I bought Depakote, it cost over $130.  No way had it been... reduced? 

I checked the medication, it was the real deal, then I paid and snatched it up like I stole it, putting it in my bag.  I figured out later Doc wrote it for DR instead of ER.  Apparently extended release costs an extra $120.  Thank you, Doc.  I got DR which is, I guess, "delayed" release. 

I always think I "have" to pay what I do for my medication, but as it turns out I don't. 

Ron's just castigating Chuck.  I guess we won't be using him as a driver anymore.  Ron is really furious at Chuck for "failing" him the other day.  Ron roasted him a new one, now Chuck (sad to say) knows what it is like to be on the receiving end of one of Ron's alcoholic rages. 

Chuck made a big production out of telling us (Ron and me) "Just tell me if Ron gets out of hand, and I'll stop buying him alcohol."  One night I called him (Chuck) in tears, telling him Ron was being very verbally abusive, and holding the phone in the air.  I figured that would put an end to the alcohol buying, but it didn't.  A week later he showed up with a case of vodka. 

Now, sad to say, he gets it.  I'm not even remotely happy or vindicated.  I wouldn't wish Ron's rages on anyone, except maybe the man who ran him over. 

Ron's decided to have a blackout.  It's going to be a long night most likely.  I wasn't sleeping too well anyway, I'll console myself with that if Ron keeps me up.  I'm hoping he just goes to bed. 

I tried to tell Ron we don't have viable alternatives, but he wouldn't hear me.  As far as he was concerned Chuck had "failed" him and he has big issues with people who do that.  It is not uncommon for him to yell at me when I get sick.  I can sort of understand the whole "You need to fight this and get over it" "pep talks" but he has yelled at me, going on about what "he needs". 

Ron can be amazingly generous, and amazingly selfish, all in one package. 

I got the rest of my stuff, 12 hour mucus stuff without the cough suppressant, some Children's Claratin (I can take that, it doesn't make me freak out like the adult dose).  I got some more food for us and treats for the cats.  Since I have over 100 cans of cat food (at 2 a day, they go pretty fast), I decided not to get any more cat food. 

I paid, found Ron, and we left.  We had a pretty good ride home.  I only had one tiny issue with the driver.  My bags have two sets of straps, short ones, and long ones.  A lot of drivers grab one short strap and one long one, and try to carry it like that.  It doesn't work.  But if that's the only issue I had I'm doing pretty well. 

We got home and I put away our food.  I set my medication by the pills-of-the-week organizer and took a nap. 

I didn't take my 12 hour stuff until 6 PM.  I took the 4-hour stuff until then.  I don't want the stuff to wear off in the middle of the night, when I'm sleeping. 

I didn't sleep very well but I got a little rest.  Today was supposed to be my "rest up and recover" day.  We'll see what the night looks like. 

I finally got up around 4.  I didn't, ashamed to say, do my God Time tonight but I may do it before I go to bed.  I'm doing the minimum here for now. 

I put my lithium in the pills-of-the-week and figured out the Depakote was a DR instead of an ER.  I doubt it will make much difference.  Maybe I'll lose some weight. 

Speaking of weight loss, I have no appetite - this happens when I get sick.  I used to scare the hell out of my adoptive Mom with this.  It will come back when I'm better.  In the meantime, I just have to endure. 

I'm not depressed, I have what I would call an average mood. 

I took one of my Claratin because I got tired of the itching in my nose.  That prickly itching sensation just drove me nuts.  It is better.  If I could just get rid of the congestion (but decongestants would cause a fatal seizure, so I'm stuck with the mucus pills - which, all told, do a decent job). 

Ron's passed out in his wheelchair, in the kitchen.  I won't try to move him or he'll fall. 

I just checked our trips so I can set the alarm.  Let me do that. 

I am really happy to announce I have not just the heated mattress pad, but the vaporizer, with the "vapo-steam" inserts.  I really liked that the last time I was sick.  I can't really smell it but I'm sure it would help. 

I wish you could have seen me grimly eating my dinner, pasta with chicken.  I wasn't hungry (how many times have I told you?  -grin-), but I had to take my pills.  I had done them up already.  I know pasta and chicken is an OK TV dinner to consume with my medication.  I ate a tiny pecan tartlet with it, they sell them at Walmart.  That, I did enjoy eating. 

It wasn't enough sugar to mess up my immune system. 

Well, my steamer has been steaming for a while now, Torbie's in the bedroom, and I have a couple of drinks to help with the inevitable dry mouth from the mucus pills.  It's off to bed. 

I'll let you know how the whole thing pans out with Ron and Chuck.  Right now Ron was pretty furious.