All in

I lay in bed last night, it was 2 AM.  I could feel the bugs all over my body, biting, crawling, and jumping.  I had suffered with them for a couple nights running.   I tore up the bed looking for them, disturbing the cat, and seriously considered fumigating.  I had to get rid of those bugs.

My problem was that they didn't exist.  I was hallucinating.  I still am.  I can feel something crawling in my hair, but I know it doesn't exist.

You've heard a lot about Ron.  So, when I heard him making alert noises, I got out of bed, and told him I was having problems with invisible bugs.  He talked me out of using the pesticide, talked to me as I took my protocol medication (If I hallucinate, I take another dose of something, per Doc), and encouraged me as I waited for it to kick in.

For all appearances, he was delighted to see me, sorry I was "ill" and couldn't have been nicer or more matter-of-fact.  I imagine most "normals" would run screaming.

Happily, today I had an appointment to see Doc.  First, though, we went to the grocery store.  I got a few things and came back home, then we got our next ride.  Doc is a ways off; we rode for nearly 2 hours.

When we got in to see him, he had a resident with him.  I am always happy to discuss my illness, symptoms, and management with anyone.  Especially the prescribing doctors of tomorrow.

I shared my test results and Doc agreed the lithium level was terrible.  He agreed my new dose sounded about right, and told me to get another test in 6 weeks.  He said the bugs are usually related to stimulants and/or anxiety.

So, I intend to cut out my only stimulant, the diet soda.  Doc was very nice as he told me I need to lose the weight; he's worried about my health.  Ron was clearly also concerned about my health.

I'd be a real idiot to ignore that.  I like to think I'm not an idiot.

So, I'll be low-carbing again, AND getting rid of diet soda.  It means a rough couple weeks for me, a lot of migraines, but I will come out of it a lot healthier at the end.

And if kicking the bugs means kicking the soda, I'm all in.