Well, here I am at week 8 on Atkins.
Yesterday, I had to ride with a blind (diabetic) woman who kept begging for a candy bar. I referred to it as "disgusting" on a message board and upset someone. I'm sorry, but watching someone who's gone blind from sugar addiction having to ride the paratransit system and still begging for a candy bar is disgusting. The intensity...the persistence...the attitude when I said no... the attempted guilt trip (I didn't buy a ticket) when she realized I meant no...was very offensive. Then she tried to ask a bunch of nosy questions which we refused to answer.
Ron used to work in the Tenderloin District of San Francisco. It is probably one of the worst cities in the US for homeless beggars/drug addicts. Even they couldn't hold a candle to this woman. UGH. I'm not sorry I called it disgusting. God tried to wake her up and she missed it. Now she's blind, feeding her sugar addiction - not on her own, but trying to sponge off of other, hard-working people who contribute to society instead of taking from it. Whooo. She'd really find that upsetting. It's how I feel, though.
It takes one to know one - I'm a sugar addict. I know it. So I avoid the stuff. I went through sugar withdrawal. It was ugly. I feel a thousand times better for doing it. I work in vending, surrounded by sugar and salty treats. I have to smell the candy as I put it into the machine. I have to touch it. I have to listen to the crinkly wrapper sound. I resist, I know I'd better or I'm going to end up as one of those one-legged, 400 pound women in a wheelchair that I see periodically.
I've got to be tough. Today was a good example. I was pretty tired and when I got up, pretty sore. I rode to work with a guy who probably weighs between 350 and 400 pounds. He's heavy enough that he has trouble fitting into his cab. We got to talking about Atkins. He seems really interested and wrote "Dr Atkins New Diet Revolution" down so he can get it after work. He is serious and committed to the idea of losing weight for his health. I think he'll do it. I told him "I hope you're half the man you are now when I see you again!" He laughed and agreed.
We used to ride with another driver who weighed about the same. I haven't seen him in ages. I hope he's OK. He was a young man.
When we got to work, I put in the snickers bars that caused all the excitement yesterday. Snacks are slow - a nice change, I only had to put in about a dozen bags of chips. A lot of running around and helping Ron, clearing off a pallet, and getting the milk order. Time to go to Walmart. We rode with a blind lady who turned around in her seat and stared at me (I guess she has some vision) when I was telling the driver about other drivers, who, when I was fat, would make comments like:
Gee, you're so big now. What happened?
You used to look so good. What happened?
Boy, you got fat!
No, ma'am, I won't let you lift that. You're expecting.
But now that I've lost 23 pounds, it's funny now. I brought up Atkins again (I'm a little ambassador of sorts). We went to Walmart, I got cube steaks and such, came home. The driver who brought us home said she loves getting our trips. That always makes my day. I want to be the client they're happy to pick up.
I was really sore by now - I will be taking some asprin when I finish this, and I took a nap. When I got up, I was craving sugar big-time. I was about to type "Thank God I don't have any sugar in the house" when I realized I do, in fact, have a 48 count case of snickers on the couch. Let's have a laugh together. I want a sweet. I'm walking right past the candy bars, never seeing them. So, I wanted a sweet. I decided to experiment with some protein powder, some fluid heavy whipping cream, and my mixer. OOOOOH it was so good and the first bite or two totally SLEW my cravings. I'm very pleased with myself.
Time to go throw some clothes in the dryer. I hope you're having a good one. I'm glad today is an off day for workouts. The humidity is brutal!
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