It's hard to be crazy

Last night, as I tried to sleep, I heard music.

The annoying thing, many times, at night, I hear music.

This is my life.  I lie there, tossing back and forth.  Is it real?  Is it, what we euphemistically refer to as a "Seagull" (hallucination), in my house?  How many years will I wonder if the music is real!?

I felt fine, so I didn't think it was a hallucination.  Generally they run with anxiety and paranoia.  Didn't have them.  Just mild annoyance and long-suffering.  Pain.

It is awful to doubt what you perceive to be real.  Ron has a moderate hearing loss, so I couldn't verify with him even if he had been awake.

I just lay there, wondering... I used the experience to remind me to call Doc and get more Haldol (he only wrote me a month's worth).  I decided to believe a neighbor had turned on some music, and I went to sleep.

Today was a good day at work.  We got a new coin counter.  I plugged it on the surge protector (very important to have surge protectors).  I didn't hear anything that wasn't there, and Doc called in a 3 month refill on my Haldol.

After work, which went very well, we went to Walmart.  I had just enough time to make my deposit and buy groceries (I like their diet yogurt).  I bought Ron his favorite chicken from the deli, ate, and took my lithium.

That's one thing the reality issues do: remind me to take everything on a tight schedule.

We got home, and I went to take a nap.  And there's the music again.  AGH.

Fast forward a few hours.  Ron is looking for the cat.  I open the garage door, and there's the music.

See, the back of the garage is a shared wall with my bedroom.  My head is very near that wall, when I'm in bed!

I had an alarm clock-radio in there.  It was on, for some ungodly reason.

I immediately stormed in and unplugged it.

That probably explains all the "hearing music" issues for the last year or so.  I seldom go in the garage.

AGH.  It's hard to be crazy.

Ron understands me well: "This is going in your blog".  You bet.