Unspeakable

OH, I was horrified.

I had been getting impatient to get my blood test results.  Imagine my horror when I opened the email and saw:  the optimal level for lithium is .6 to 1.something.  That's not bad.

What is unspeakable: my lithium level was only .1.  That's right - 15% of ideal!  OH!  I was so aghast I had to check it several times.

I am so uptight about taking my pills.  If I miss a dose, I get really upset.  The rare times I've missed more than one dose, due to migraines, I had nightmares.  

Of course, once I came to terms with my horrible lithium level, I had some aha moments.  No wonder I am suffering from a horrible mixed depression.  No wonder I feel so hopeless.

No wonder I spent hours online, looking at strange things I'd normally never consider, and had a hard time getting certain thoughts out of my head.

Oh, how dreadful.  Hm.  How many negative adjectives can I cram into one post?

Then I had a look at the rest of the tests.  Pretty normal.  Happily not diabetic in spite of a year of dreadful eating.  Most tests were smack in the middle of normal or very close.  The few that were out of range reflect the lab tech's diagnosis of "very dehydrated".

I'm really glad I got the test.  It explains just about everything.  Frankly, I'm baffled how my level got so low when I am so consistent.  Maybe because I gained weight?

I'm also really glad it's something easy like a low lithium level; that, after a phone call, is easily fixed with an increased dosage (call your doctor!).   An increased dosage means "feeling better right quick".  Which, I actually am.

Ugh.   A level like that is like a nightmare come to life.  Thank God I went for the test.