Saturday, August 15, 2015

Dominant species

Still horribly depressed, but the anxiety is very slowly improving.  I was thinking about it today.  I have had bouts with anxiety for a very long time. 

Much as I'd like to think it "just" popped up - it's a part of my illness.  Boo. 

Of course, the anxiety wasn't helped when Ron told me someone had hacked his debit card and bought $100 worth of I-tunes.  He will have to fight it, but at least he killed the card.  Agh.  I'm sure he'll get the money back, but it's aggravation we don't need. 

It's one reason I always tell him to keep a minimal balance in the account. 

I was pretty exhausted, and have battled a nasty headache most of the day.  I didn't do my God Time yet but will attack it later. 

I did do some housekeeping, took my shower, shaved my legs, dressed, got my back brace, etc.  I dressed in my moisture-wicking performance t-shirt (worth every penny of the $12 I spent), capris, and steel toed slip ons, and headed out the door. 

Truck Day.  During the course of the day, I handed out 4 Bibles, all of which were very well received.  Generally speaking, if God leads me to hand out a Bible, the recipient is thrilled.  Two ladies actually hugged the Bibles.  :) 

We went to the store.  They were running some kind of promotion.  Everyone was buying these huge televisions.  Even if you gave me one, I'd have nowhere to put it!  I think the replacement for my current TV would run about $150, maximum.  However, I'm completely happy with my oldster, and the criminals sure didn't steal it when they robbed my house, did they? 

That was worth it right there. 

[sigh] 

I bought all the snacks I felt I'd need, and the sodas Ron needed.  I had a difficult time getting everything into the stockroom at the end of the day, let me tell you! 

Sometimes I think God helps me by bending the laws of physics, to enable more mass in a smaller space!  [grin] 

Anyway, I got it out of the store, into the truck, out of the truck, onto the carts, into the building, into the vending machines, into the stockroom.  I also rotated to move the older stuff first.  It is REALLY easy to screw up and stock the new stuff first, but you have to rotate! 

I also did countless candy bars and the ever popular sour gummy worms. 

I helped Ron, but overall the machines didn't need much. 

Ron has been in agony all day.  He confided his neuropathy got very bad when the got the apple brandy, and it's just progressed.  He's only drinking a beer at night now (his choice).  I supported it. 

At any rate, he's been hobbling, bent over, in clear and obvious pain.  It is really awful to love someone in chronic pain. 

I have asked him, repeatedly, if he'd like to go to urgent care.  His answer remains: no.  

Torbie, by the way (my brown/orange tabby) nearly killed him this morning.  Ron can trip and fall, very easily, if he encounters any obstacle while walking. 

Torbie decided to act possessed and wad up the bathmat, in front of the toilet, today.  I'm glad I peed first, or he'd have fallen and hit his head on the tub.  I straightened it out, she did it again. 

I know a little about cats.  I could leave it, she'd do it again, and Ron would fall.  I could take it away completely, "solving" the issue, somewhat.  Or I could put it on the pink storage box, her favorite lounging area.  I chose to do the last.  She happily wadded it up and rolled on it, delighted. 

I guess she doesn't know the hot pink clashes with her fur.  Or doesn't care.  

Felines are the dominant species in my household. 

I worked my butt off, again.  I literally had aching gluteus muscles.  I was pretty stiff when I got up from my nap, too. 

We had a little more time than we needed, good.  We actually had time to use the bathroom for a change. 

Our ride was late and the driver, not optimal.  It is very alarming when I give a clear direction "Take the next exit" and they drive right past it.  She either drove too aggressively or not aggressively enough.  I don't know who passed her in training, but I don't think she'll last long. 

I'm not hating, I'm scared!  I wouldn't want to ride with her again, due to fears for our safety. 

Have you ever been dependent on a driver you felt wasn't safe?  It's not a good place, and leads me to wondering just why my birth mother had to drink, so very much, every day of her pregnancy with me. 

We got home late, but we arrived intact.  I call that a win. 

We took a short nap.  I woke up with a pretty vicious headache, but I still wanted to go out. 

Our ride came pretty fast.  We were her last trip of the day, and boy she was happy to find it was a very short trip. 

We went to a Salvadoran restaurant.  I met the owner at the wholesale club.  He only had a couple items, I had over 50, so I "let" him go first.  Ron really thought that was awesome and said that's why he loves me. 

I don't see it as a big deal.  I hope someone would do that for me! 

I had a couple of very cold Sprite Zeros.  I ordered one pupusa.  I had the loroco, squash blossom + cheese in basically fried cornbread.  It was very good, mild and tasty. 

Ron had 2, more "manly" offerings, pork, beans, cheese.  He gobbled them up like I don't feed him, and even Gravy licked his hands when he got home. 

We had a good time.  The neighborhood was a little iffy but we'd be fine if we went earlier. 

When we got home, I left very good reviews online.  They're a new restaurant and I want to give them a boost.  Besides, they deserve it. 

They left a very kind comment on my review, I'm glad they liked it.  I only told the truth. 

I have a gift with words, I can use that for good, and I will. 

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