Last year is probably going to go down as one of my more significant life events

 It really woke me up and got me thinking about things in my life.  

Ron was abusive.  He was manipulative, gas lighting, selfish, and a control freak.  

I think that's one reason I'm not interested in looking for someone else.  Afraid I will end up with a jerk.  I will leave that up to God.  He knows where to find me.  

One thing I grapple some people in my life have this narrative of Ron as a loving husband.  Pretty much everyone.  I don't think it will do much good to take that apart.  People I've met since his death I have been clear Ron did not treat me right, no details.  

I'm going to think on that for a while, I think.