I hate those "find out your ancestry" ads.
I know enough about my family to feel like a total loser. My Dad's family, men and women, all college graduates for over 100 years. My Dad has an MS in engineering from a very well known university.
I don't know as much about my mother's family: Mom attended some college but couldn't complete it due to the bipolar/alcoholic/teen mom thing. Her mother, though - my maternal grandmother (the one diagnosed with schitzophrenia), was a mathemetician.
I didn't even make it through pre-algebra.
Then let's look at me: mixed performance in school due to an undiagnosed learning disability. Once that was diagnosed and the teaching adapted (leave me in a quiet corner with a stack of workbooks), I pulled straight A's. I actually liked learning.
However, I dropped out of high school for two reasons: one, the special ed program was requisitioning special computer equipment for "my visual disability" - one reason I was not "permitted" to graduate with my class. They wanted it for the next fiscal year - if I graduated on time my "visual impairment" went with me and no computer system. I didn't like being used. It made me VERY angry. I have "coke bottle" glasses, that's it. I'm not "visually impaired".
Secondly, I turned 18. I knew I could not attend college and live at home. Too many reasons to mention. I also knew I wouldn't be allowed to date Ron even though I was an adult. I dropped out, moved out, and ran off with the love of my life.
I don't regret it. Even when things have been awful, I don't regret it.
Ron nagged me into getting my GED. I got some of the highest scores for my county. I attended some college, 15 units with a 3.2 GPA, almost enough for a certificate (but we moved to Texas and I had to work full time once we "landed).
Do I wish I had a degree? No. I see a lot of people struggling even with the degree. I have heard many horror stories of student loans, as well. I'm very glad I don't have that burden of debt.
But, I have to admit, I feel like a black sheep when I think about all my "smart", degreed, relatives.
1 comment:
Your dad and his family might seem smarter to you because of a college degree BUT that intelligence did not lend itself to compassion for you when you were a child growing up and the way he allowed you to be treated by his wife (your step mother).
I would rather a person be not quite as smart (we want a little common sense) and have a great afinity toward people (especially kin) and compassion toward making sure we are good to each other and other people are good to the ones we love.
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