Today on our ride home from Krogers (we use the paratransit shared-ride service because I can't drive, another post topic), an older lady asked us several very intrusive questions. She had a difficult time believing we didn't have children and even more trouble with the concept that we don't want them. I have to say, you should all get down on your knees and thank God we didn't.
What is it with this whole societal concept that I'm not a "real" woman until I have kids? I have regular cycles, not that it's anyone's business. My life is difficult enough managing my disabilities. And my husbands? Now, add a perfectly healthy child into the equation - a lot of work and buckets of money. No thanks. Children take a tremendous amount of time and energy, time and energy I don't have. I need to take a nap most days and so does my husband! I have a healthy ego that does not need an infant to complete.
Now, let's take a look at the fruit of my womb. Most likely, it will have a mood disorder. My medications cause birth defects so I'd have to go off my known-to-work drug cocktail and go on something else. I'll probably get sick again from that (my main goal in life - not getting sick again with bipolar freakouts). It could have the Bubble boy disease (what possibly killed my brother at age 3 weeks). And my husband's DNA needs to be taken out and shot! He has congenital glaucoma (50% odds of his child having it), nerve deafness, etc. When he learned that, he got fixed. I think it's wonderful. So why do people get an attitude when we say, we're not having children because we'd never bring them home from the hospital? What is the deal? They should be thanking God that we're not costing the taxpayers hundreds of thousands of dollars! Instead, they get angry at me. I'm baffled.
I happily pay my school tax. I enjoy the neighbor children. Now that I'm taking my pills, I like kids in an abstract way. I think they're cute. But when I want something to lavish with love, I'll go pet my cats. Suck it up.
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