Where's the knitting?

Let's see. I've done the pilot and ranting on a few subjects near and dear to my heart.

So what about the knitting?

I don't have digital pictures yet (coming soon!) so I'll just have to describe my projects. I learned to crochet when I was 8 because someone gave me a "Knitting nobby". I couldn't figure it out. I tried so hard I ended up in tears! I asked my Mom and stepsister. No joy. So, they taught me to crochet instead.

I was definitely an on-again-off-again crocheter. When I'm manic, I tend to feel a tremendous flow of creative juices. Hundreds of color ideas and textural images stampede through my brain. I buy yarn, lots of it, and happily plan and execute, until... the crash. The depression hits and the poor sad yarn would languish in the closet for another few months.

After Ron's accident, I made dozens of 2 strand granny square afghans on a lovely N hook Ron bought me for a present. Pretty much everyone involved with his care got a handmade original. Crocheting really helped settle me out and smooth all the rough edges of my mood dramas.

Last year, however, my illness took an ugly turn and I became deeply and repeatedly suicidal. The only way I could talk myself out of it was by playing the what-if-I-don't-die game. What if I jumped, and survived with a broken neck? I thought life was hard before, try it as a quadraplegic! What if I took pills, and lived, but fried my liver and kidneys? Eeek. I became so depressed I'd sleep with my Bible. I was too exhausted to read it so I'd cling to it like a teddy bear every night.

The depression led to my diagnosis (actually, I was cycling into mania when I met the expert and it was fairly easy to slap me with the bipolar label) and medication, praise God. However, I had a hard time getting into crochet again. I'm sorry, but I just associate it with "Being Sick".

My illness and disability come with unique benefits, though, one of them being a tremendous creative impulse. I really enjoy pulling a couple balls of yarn into something spectacular.

Currently, I'm working on a worsted weight Feather-and-Fan shawl. My grandmother (now with Jesus) used the F&F pattern in all her afghans so I guess you could call it a tribute. I'm using Cascade 200, in Orange Heather, golden yellow, and an in-between yellow/orange. I also have a few little accent rows in Paton's Merino red. I love to take it along with me every where I go, and then I can whip out a few rows while I'm waiting on our ride. I'm working it on a 29-inch circular size 8 (5mm) needle, which makes it easy to stuff it into my bag at will. I've botched a few rows, missed yarn-overs and such, but I'm having a lot of fun. People who see it seem to love it, and I'll be so toasty this winter! I love warm fall colors.

It's two feet wide and I intend for it to be about 6 feet long.

Here's the pattern:
Feather and Fan
Mulitiple of 12 stitches (I don't know which multiple I used in the shawl, according to my notes it should be about 60 or 72)
Row 1: Knit
Row 2: Purl
Row 3: (P2tog) 2 times, * (yo, k1) 4 times, (P2tog) 4 times, repeat from * to end of row. You will end on 2 P2Tog (that scared me to death at first, so I'll state what I wish the pattern maker wrote).
Row 4: Purl.

The pattern is especially pretty if you end color A on row 4. I use a water splice (wet the ends of the yarn and rub together with my hands), so I don't have any ends to weave. Photo coming soon!